Ten Things Dan Murphy Learned in College
Or, "why college really ain't that bad."
Sure, college is the most expensive way to learn to party, but you come out on the other side with a degree and a blackbelt, in most cases. So, I decided to ask Mystery's Dan Murphy what skills he learned in collegedrinking or otherwiseand have him tell me in his own words:
I definitely learned how to party. I think I'm pretty good at partying. When I graduated, I also graduated from partying and I knew I'd have to hold up my name as a partier, now. I got so many blackout stories, but that's part of partying, too. It's probably the most expensive way to learn how to party good, but whatever.
I learned to do kegstands way before I got into college, but I got better at them in college. I can do them a long time. It all depends on how the dude's countin', but I can do 30 seconds no problem. I mean, I'll pass out upside down and I'll still be chuggin', you know? My mom got me one of those little Heineken kegs for Christmas last year and I tried to do a kegstand out of that, but, you know, it was just drinking as much as I could out of that damn spout.
3. The self-inflicted kegstand:
We did a bunch of them at that Dreamspot. A bunch of people did. Dude, Danny Deanhe was handling all the party moves that night. I was kind of tired and sore and it sucked, because everyone was partying and I couldn't party, 'cause I was trying to skate. So, I was having a few beers, but you know how that goes. I always hurt myself, every time I'm wasted and skating. You're talking about that front flip, where you put your hands on the keg and put your feet up against the wall? It's like a kegstand, solo. I did that in college a few times. Danny Dean did that that night. He ate s**t dude. He got his feet so high in the air and the keg slipped out and he came down on the keg. He's the guy who fell stompin' the balloons in the Dreamspot. We told him we didn't think those balloons are gonna hold you, but he didn't care. He was more concerned about spilling his beer, he smacked his face on the ground.
4. The gargoyle:
I think I've done that. Come on, I've definitely done that. It's the one where you sit up on top of the keg like a gargoyle and claim it as a joke? Start drinkin' out of the tap? I can remember doing that at a random house I was at and I think I disrespected them, 'cause I kind of claimed the keg. I almost got roughed up. I mean, you gotta watch yourself, because if you're at the wrong house, you can't be claimin' the keg. You gotta share. That's what I learned.
5. Being a good dog owner:
I got my dog during college, Indy. He'd be so pissed when I was going to class. He thought I was ditching him. He was just a little pup, so he'd f**k up my house. I had to get seriously disciplined as a dog owner. I think it paid off, because now he's a good dog, you know? I remember my neighbor, she got his [Indy's] brother and he would just stare at me. This dog was always looking at me and I was so into him, man. I was like; he's got really good attention skills. Then, one day she left a note on my door and wrote, "There's another dog. I think there's two or three left. You can get one, but I just want to make sure you're a good dog owner." I wasn't responsible then, but I got him. He'd run away and I wouldn't sleep for, like, days. I'd be up yellin', walkin' around looking for him. The first year he probably ran away fifteen, twenty times and he'd be away for whole days. Longest he was away was two whole days. But, then I got more responsible with him.
6. That I couldn't live in dorms:
I learned I definitely couldn't live in dorms. I got in trouble too much. I just didn't fit in there.
7. Women's Psychology:
I studied a lot about women. For a psychology major at NC State, at least 90% were women, so I learned a LOT about women in collegebehind the scenes and in front of the scenes and...To be professional, I learned a lot about women's anatomy and it was good, because there were so many damn girls in my major.
I'd be all nervous, but I learned how to do presentationsdo two shots of Cavasier. It loosens you up. It works dude, it works. I would take two shots and it was like liquid courage for a presentation. You could do it at the party talking to the girl or in class for presentations. One of the reasons I graduated was because I could do good presentations. Dude, I got good grades, too.
9. Don't wear North Carolina blue at NC State:
I was real hyped to be in North Carolina. I didn't know better. I ended up getting into college sports that year. Before that, I couldn't care less. I just wanted to skate. So, I was like, "I'm moving to North Carolina. I love Cacka blue, man." I thought it was tight. The first day of school, I wore Cacka blue and everybody was like, "What?" I almost got my ass kicked. That's our number one rival, you know what I mean? We're black and red, so I f**ked up. I ended up gaining a lot of pride in school over those next four years, though. I definitely learned you don't wear North Carolina blue to NC State.
10. North Carolina's my home:
I was hyped when I went out there. I made my best friends out there. I'll have them for life. I go there, like, ten times a year. If I could do my skateboard s**t there, I'd do that. You know, Jamie [Thomas] taught me the ropes about the skateboard industry. I knew I wanted to go out to Cali and Jamie wanted me to go out there to learn how business works and get the whole experience. So, originally, I was like, "Can I stay in Cacka?" I graduated and I just wanted to stay there. I liked my house and my life and my friends and everything. But he was like, "Just come out here and give it a try." The original plan was to be out in Cali for a year, but I've been here for five now. I didn't know I was going to have a career at that point. I was just hoping and I had a dream, so when I did get out here, I learned that this is where you need to be. I can always go home. I can go out and skate every day. I can skate the park every daythat resource is amazing. I can go up north, down south and skate all the parks. It's just better for work. But, it's definitely my dream to move back down to Cacka. I learned that going to college at NC State. It's just sick out there. I miss the storms and the weather. People are real hospitable and happy. I mean, people out here are relaxed, but it's just simple out there.