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ACC's lunchtime links

Santa Claus: How about a nice football?

Adult Ralphie:Football? Football? What's a football? With unconscious will my voice squeaked out 'football.'

Santa Claus: Okay, get him out of here.

Adult Ralphie: A football? Oh no, what was I doing? Wake up, Stupid! Wake up!

Ralphie: No! No! I want an Official Red Ryder Carbine-Action Two-Hundred-Shot Range Model Air Rifle!

Santa Claus: You'll shoot your eye out, kid.