Why don't you just whip up a batch of your fancy tofu sushi bagels and choke on them!
With so much going wrong in the last year for Texas, it finally got something right, writes Kirk Bohls of the Austin American-Statesman.
Dave Matter of the Columbia Tribune has more on Gary Pinkel saying thanks, but no thanks to Michigan, who wanted to speak with him about its job opening last week.
Bill Haisten of the Tulsa World has the truth about what really happened to Brandon Weeden's thumb last season.
New Texas Tech quarterback Michael Brewer says he's ready to patiently wait his turn at the helm of the Red Raiders' offense, reports Don Williams of the Lubbock Avalanche-Journal.
Tech, by the way, will be kicking off its spring practice a little earlier than usual.
Oklahoma State is doing what Mike Gundy said it would after upgrading its facilities: Getting good players and keeping them around for a long time, writes Berry Tramel of The Oklahoman.
Colleague Todd McShay says Blaine Gabbert is the No. 1 most underrated prospect in the 2011 draft, and Justin Blackmon is the No. 3 returning underclassman.
Jimmy Burch of the Fort Worth Star-Telegram gives a look ahead to the Big 12 in 2011.
Losing on the road is a trend that's affected more than just the football team at Colorado, writes Kyle Ringo of the Boulder Daily Camera.
Kansas tight end Jimmay Mundine is a "stud in the making," writes Matt Tait of the Lawrence Journal-World.