If I was a D-list celebrity with ironic cachet -- I'm thinking, say, Chuck Norris, Mike Tyson, Alfonso Ribeiro, the dude who used to play Hercules on that WB show, folks like that -- I would totally start recording voicemails for fans for a nominal fee. It's a great idea! People would pay to have an ironic celebrity voicemail. At the very least, it beats signing autographs at Comic-Con. Your wrist doesn't hurt, you don't have to "spend time" with "actual" "fans" -- the benefits are numerous.

Bill Self is not a D-list celebrity. He is a popular coach at one of the most popular basketball programs in the country. Either way, Self is using this rather awesome voicemail idea, but he's doing it for a much better cause.

Per The Dagger, Self is utilizing the Assists Foundation, a charity he and his wife launched in 2006, to raise money for a shopping trip Kansas players and staff take each winter to buy gifts and necessities for needy families around Christmas. If you donate $5 to the charity via this Crowdrise.com page, your name is dropped into a hat (er, "peach basket") and submitted for a chance to win Self's custom-made voicemail. Each $5 donation equals one submission. The more submissions ... well, yeah, you get the idea.

It's a fantastic fundraising idea. What die-hard Kansas fan wouldn't want to have "Hey, this is Kansas coach Bill Self, and you've reached the voicemail of [insert your name here]?" Wouldn't that make you the envy of all your friends? I mean, yeah, the charitable donation is nice, and so is the aim of Self's philanthropic efforts. But really, isn't "making my friends insanely jealous" what the Christmas season is all about?