Medical excuse form: Red Fever epidemic

Texas Rangers

Nervous? Got the shakes? Breaking out in a cold sweat? Anxiety attacks? Having sudden cravings for hot dogs, nachos and peanuts?

Fear not. It's just playoff fever. Or "Red Fever" as Texas Rangers CEO (and honorary team doctor) Chuck Greenberg has dubbed it. But you need to act quickly. Red Fever isn't good at the workplace, as it could prove contagious and decrease efficiency in the office. It possibly could reach epidemic levels in the Metroplex, beginning as early as this afternoon.

The cure? Print this form out and hand it to your boss. We're sure they'd understand ... and possibly come down with a case of it as well.