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Tuesday, January 15, 2013
20 things overheard by Dolan's mikes

By DJ Gallo

Carmelo Anthony
Knicks owner James Dolan is reportedly trying to hear a little of Carmelo Anthony's on-court chatter.
New York Knicks owner James Dolan recorded the in-game conversations of Carmelo Anthony and those around him in two recent games, a move Dolan reportedly made to see if opponents were going overboard with trash talk directed at Anthony.

No doubt the recording devices picked up conversations of fans sitting near the court, as well. Playbook was given access to those hypothetical conversations.

1. "See that guy down there holding that clear bowl thing? What band do you think he is in?"

2. "I really doubt Kevin Garnett said that, because the quote attributed to him didn't have any profanity."

3. "Yes, Nana, that's the same Jason Kidd who played back when you were growing up."

4. "Knicks or Nets? I don't know. I think New York's team will be whichever team takes its fans on a magical ride into the second round of the playoffs."

5. "You know what would be a good women's perfume? Jimmy Dean Sausage, Egg and Cheese Breakfast Sandwich. They are delicious."

6. "No snitching."

7. "OK, $5 then for my signed Jeremy Lin jersey. It's the lowest I'll go."

8. "Honest. Before he became the team mascot, Spike Lee was a real Hollywood director."

9. "No, man. I'm not a nut job. Believe me: there are recording devices everywhere. I bet someone is even listening to us right now. OK, sure. Don't believe me. You'll see."

10. "The only thing holding this franchise back is our moron of an owner."

11. "You interested in getting tickets for the Big East Tournament here this March? Yeah, really. It still exists."

12. "Look, I'm a billionaire mayor and you are a lowly waitress. You will sprain that player's ankle and you will do it now."

13. "I got you a hot dog. They didn't have Honey Nut Cheerios at the concession stand. Sorry."

14. "You think Nickelback is the worst band ever? I guess you haven't heard JD & The Straight Shot."

15. "I wouldn't want to be recorded saying this, but I think Isiah Thomas was a decent GM."

16. "Want to go out after the game? I know about this underground club that serves 20-ounce sodas. Yeah, it's crazy."

17. "I heard they're having a hockey game here this weekend. No, it's like soccer, but on ice and with sticks."

18. "Did you know that James Dolan's uncle owns the Cleveland Indians? So James is actually the successful owner in the family."

19. "What breakfast cereal do you think is the most sensual?"

20. "Tebow."