Tuesday, March 19, 2013
WWE Power Rankings: Where's The Rock?
By Jon Robinson
John Cena had little trouble with Darren Young, while Cena's main rival, The Rock, was absent again.
Quick, name the five worst gimmicks in WWE history? Mantaur, Bastion Booger, Kerwin White, Kizarny and the Red Rooster all jump to the front of my mind, but if WWE keeps pushing Fandango down our throats, he might finish at the top of my bottom-feeders. Seriously, I can’t remember a more crowd-killing character to come around in recent memory, and to make matters worse (as if the silly dancing weren’t bad enough), all of his “pronounce my name right” segments just go on and on and on with no merciful end in sight.
But Fandango wasn’t the only problem (although I appreciate the crowd chanting “You can’t wrestle!” during his segment), as last night’s Raw will go down as one of the historically bad nights in wrestling television (and a clear signal that they need to end the three-hour experiment).
Wrestlemania is less than three weeks away and we had another no-show from WWE champ The Rock; a crowd that has so turned on Alberto Del Rio that they were actually chanting “USA” while the supposed heel Jack Swagger was beating him down and welcoming him to Jack Swagger’s America; and a promo in which, instead of John Cena going all ether on The Rock for not showing up (again!), he instead traded pointless jabs with the Primetime Players before burying Darren Young and making one of WWE’s most promising young tag teams look like noncontending fools.
Maybe instead of a Top Ten, this week I should’ve done a bottom ten. I swear it would’ve been easier.
WWE Power Rankings: March 19, 2013
Gave Paul Heyman an intense beating (and really seemed to enjoy the work). With the retirement stipulation added to the mix, will Triple H's match against Brock Lesnar at Wrestlemania be the legend's last?
Amazing how much fuel you can add to the fire when both guys are, you know, actually on Raw (hello, Rock). I like how they're making this match more personal, and Heyman's dig at Stephanie McMahon added to the hatred between everyone involved.
Followed his epic match against Chris Jericho on Smackdown by delivering one of the most memorable moments on Raw with his brutal attack on Del Rio and Ricardo Rodriguez. It was one of the few moments all night that the crowd actually seemed alive.
Dolph Ziggler and Big E Langston
We might not get Ziggler versus Daniel Bryan for the World title, but Ziggy and Big E versus Team Hell No might turn out to be one of Mania's most entertaining matches.
Randy Orton, Sheamus and The Big Show
Orton and Sheamus look like they're having a blast teaming up, and it shows in their fun matches of late. Add The Big Show to the mix, and their match against The Shield could end up stealing the show come April 7.
I don't know what happened to the writing (or lack thereof) on Raw last night, but even the dependable "best in the world" seemed to fumble through his segment.
His match against Mark Henry is now official, and I can already hear Jim Ross hollering "slobberknocker" in my mind.
Why is WWE holding him back from spitting fire on the mike and eviscerating The Rock? Forget respect, it's time for Thuganomics.
Team Hell No Kane Daniel Bryan
Excited to see the tag-team titles being defended at the biggest show of the year. Would like to see this tag-team match carry over into a bigger feud between Bryan and Ziggler down the line (a natural with AJ already in the mix).
Outstanding matches on both Smackdown and Raw, providing the best in-ring moments WWE has seen the past week. But are they really going to make him feud with Fandango heading into Wrestlemania while someone like Antonio Cesaro is left off the card?