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Thursday, December 6, 2012
We look at the fashions of Michael Jordan

By Lynn Hoppes

Michael Jordan
Michael Jordan might be the best basketball player ever, but what's with his fashion sense?
Basketball legend Michael Jordan recently refused to change his cargo shorts while playing golf at a Miami Beach country club and won't be asked to return to the course.

"They come to me on the 11th hole and say I can't wear cargo shorts," Jordan told ESPN Chicago by text last week. "Wow! The round is almost over and you want me to buy shorts now? Yeah, right!!"

Maybe Jordan should have asked for some fashion advice from the pro shop.

The greatest basketball player ever hasn't really been sporting the best in fashion since retiring from the game.

In fact, one basketball fan, Aaron Horton, created a website a couple of years ago about Jordan's fashions -- WTFismikewearing.tumblr.com -- to comment on Jordan's look.

"It started as a conversation among friends. We were noticing how poorly and weirdly he dressed," Horton said. "We figured other people thought the same way, so we gathered a bunch of photos and started posting. On a good day, we get about 40,000 page views."

Horton isn't convinced that Jordan is not in on the joke.

"At first, I thought he was just getting older or going through a divorce or a midlife crisis and trying to feel young," Horton said. "These days, I feel that he's in on the joke. I think he's just trolling everyone. He's just doing what he wants to do."

Playbook decided to ask ESPN The Magazine fashion editor Samantha Rubin and Playbook humor writer DJ Gallo for their thoughts on Jordan.

COLLECTION OF PHOTOS


1.
Michael Jordan
Michael Jordan plays at the American Century Celebrity Golf Tournament.
Rubin: Plaid is a classic staple on the golf course, but when worn by Michael Jordan the look is less than desirable. Too long, loose, baggy and pleated, the pants do nothing to accentuate his athletic frame. While wearing pink is a bold move, the T-shirt again is too loose and baggy, especially in the arms and body, making him look sloppy and not pulled together. I hope his golf game isn’t as bad as his golf attire!

Gallo: So Jordan can get thrown off of a golf course for wearing cargo shorts, but not for wearing these pants made from the upholstery on the couch your grandmother has on her sun porch in Florida. What a messed-up world.




2.
Michael Jordan
Michael Jordan is introduced as a judge before the NBA Slam Dunk Competition in 2007.
Rubin: I think an entire cow was used to make this leather blazer, which is poorly tailored and way too oversized for Jordan’s athletic frame. But leather blazers in general are not a good idea (choose a motorcycle or bomber jacket instead for a modern and edgy look). Just look at the picture: I don’t think I need to make any further comments! Also the jeans (per usual) are a complete disaster. Over-washed, too big and appear to stop mid-chest, this look is the antithesis of fashionable!

Gallo: Jordan was a judge at the 2007 slam dunk competition in this custom, one-off jacket. At least let’s hope it was a custom, one-off jacket. No one wants to live in a world in which there may be several of those in existence.




3.
Gordie Howe, Michael Jordan
Michael Jordan shows up with Gordie Howe at the 2000 ESPYS in Las Vegas.
Rubin: I didn’t know the Tin Man played basketball! Jordan should take a cue from fellow legend Gordie Howe and just rock a simple, classic and properly tailored black tuxedo. I think he’d be surprised at just how great he’d look!

Gallo: Hockey legend Gordie Howe is pictured here at the 2000 ESPY Awards with Michael Jordan, who apparently flew back for the event from the future.




4.
MJ
Michael Jordan visits the United Kingdom.
Rubin: An Olympic swim meet could be held in Michael Jordan’s clothes. Again Jordan gives us a lesson in tailoring, a lesson in exactly what not to do. His oversized sport coat and trousers obscure his frame, making him look sloppy and ridiculous. The black crew-neck T-shirt is also too casual for a red-carpet event.

Gallo: And here Michael Jordan wears his one pair of pants that aren’t jeans.




5.
Michael Jordon
Michael Jordan parties with Derek Jeter in New York in 2008.
Rubin: Memo to Derek Jeter: Just because you’re a Team Jordan athlete doesn’t mean you should dress like the man himself! This look makes the list for obvious reasons -- oversized and bland colors, but the fact that Jordan appears to be Jeter’s style icon is the real problem!

Gallo: Michael Jordan and Derek Jeter are pictured here at a Team Jordan event in 2008. There may also be another celebrity hidden inside Jordan’s giant suit jacket. No way to tell.




6.
Michael Jordan
Michael Jordan talks on the bench during a game in 2009.
Rubin: Business on top, party on the bottom. It’s the clothing version of a mullet! The white button-down and sweater vest are a pretty conservative clothing choice, the jeans scream, "Where’s the afterparty?" Let me also note that a grown man should never wear ripped/bleach splattered jeans, EVER!

Gallo: Instances in which it is appropriate to wear jeans like this in modern times: You are a commercial painter who survived a knife attack in
which a very short person repeatedly stabbed you in the legs, and you wear the jeans from that day as a reminder of the fragility of life. Or you are starring in a movie set in 1994. Or you were the most famous athlete in the world in the 1990s and for you, the '90s will always be the greatest decade, so screw anyone who says differently. You’re loaded with cash and can wear whatever you want.




7.
Michael Jordan
Michael Jordan watches in disappointment as his team loses to the Orlando Magic.
Rubin: I don’t think the look of disappointment on Jordan’s face is from a Bobcats' loss. I hope it’s for the fact that he realized his zoot-suit look went out of style in the 1940s!

Gallo: Michael Jordan watches the Charlotte Bobcats lose another game, unable to help despite wearing what appears to be a giant superhero cape and a pair of magical genie shoes.




8.
Michael Jordan
Michael Jordan was the honorary starter for a NASCAR Sprint Cup race in 2010.
Rubin: Why stop at one pair of oversized ripped/splattered jeans when you can have two? I’m happy Jordan knows the importance of adding a dark-wash jean to your wardrobe to mix things up a bit! He gets a few bonus points for the polo shirt, which is not as oversized as usual, but the jeans really should be burned immediately!

Gallo: Michael Jordan served as honorary starter at the NASCAR Sprint All-Star Race at Charlotte Motor Speedway in 2010. No doubt he then took the shiny, green flag and had it made into a suit jacket.




9.
Michael Jordan
Michael Jordan cheers on his team in 2010.
Rubin: I love this look because it shows us all exactly why Jordan is just such a horrible dresser. It has all the classic Jordan components: baggy/oversized jeans; untucked, wrinkled and extra-long dress shirt; oversized, ill-tailored, extra-long four-button sport coat -- and this time in a bright red to add a pop of color! This is just all wrong, from proportion to styling.

Gallo: Michael Jordan cheers on the Charlotte Bobcats while wearing his one pair of jeans that don’t have holes in them.



10.
Jordan
Michael Jordan, flanked by Yvette Prieto, arrive at the 11th Annual Michael Jordan Celebrity Invitational.
Rubin: It’s too bad the sartorial choices of the basketball stars of today hasn’t rubbed off on Jordan. I guess if it ain’t broke, why fix it? But if you decide to wear a shirtdress on the red carpet in 2012, maybe it’s finally time to consult with a fashion professional!

Gallo: Jordan and girlfriend Yvette Prieto show up at an event in Las Vegas in 2012, both wearing fun, sassy dresses that end above the knee.
Cute.