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Wednesday, May 9, 2012
Suh, Gronkowski are dating show judges

By DJ Gallo

Rob Gronkowski
Rob Gronkowski is dreamy and wears his cap backward. What more do you need to know, ladies?
Fox is debuting a new reality dating show on June 7 called “The Choice.” Modeled after NBC’s “The Voice,” a panel of celebrity judges will sit with their chairs turned away from the stage as a “sexy single” describes herself. If the judge likes what he hears, he can pull his “love handle” -- no, really, that’s what they’re calling it -- to spin his chair around and see his potential partner. If more than one judge tugs on the ol’ love handle, the contestant gets to pick which one she wants. Simple, right?

So what’s the sports angle?

Four of the judges confirmed for the show are current or former NFL players: Ndamukong Suh, Rob Gronkowski, Warren Sapp and Jeremy Bloom.

This seems cruel to the contestants. What if Suh, Gronkowski, Sapp and Bloom all pull their love handles over the same woman?

Contestant: “I'm sorry, I don't follow sports and don't know who you guys are. Can you tell me a bit about yourselves to help me make a decision?”

Suh: “Well, I’m probably best known for my hair-trigger temper. I am also a very bad driver."

Contestant: “OK. Next.”

Gronkowski: “If you Google me, you’ll see me with any number of women and you can see me dancing.”

Contestant: “Interesting. Next.”

Sapp: “I am overweight and bankrupt.”

Contestant: “OK. And the last one?”

Bloom: “I have skied in the Olympics and played professional football. I have also modeled and am the co-founder of a successful Internet start-up.”

Contestant: “Huh. Well, one of the main reasons I’m on this show in the first place is that I hate my parents. So the Olympics, model, business guy? You’re out. The rest of you, please tell me more.”