Jump on in, Michael Taris of Levittown, PA. You've been a busy guy. Not only have you held jobs as a male escort, a male massage therapist and a professional wrestler, 7-Eleven says you tried to rip them off. According to the Pennsylvania State Attorney General's office, you saw a "small splash of coffee" on the tile floor of a Levittown 7-Eleven in 2007 and staged a very big fall to make it look like you'd slipped. Then they say you filed a bogus claim that you'd injured your neck and back. Except wrestling fans kept seeing you doing atomic leg drops and spinebusters in the ring. You're not particularly smart, are you, Michael? You've been charged with insurance fraud and criminal attempted theft by deception. So into the lake you go, Mikey. But just for us, could you make it a triple-jump moonsault?