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And a lot of other stuff. Pretty fetching little NPR commentary called "If I Ruled Sports" includes a good point: they always say "fifty-six seconds left on the clock." Where else could those seconds possibly be?

And a lot of other stuff. Pretty fetching little NPR commentary called "If I Ruled Sports" includes a good point: they always say "fifty-six seconds left on the clock." Where else could those seconds possibly be?

I lived in Greenwich Village long enough to know that there is every different kind of costume out there, and people will wear them all. It's kind of fun. But as one ponders the big picture of life--birth, death, and everything in between--I really don't give a rat's ass about the clothes that strangers wear.

Yet strange things happen. And suddenly, through my love of the NBA, I find myself thinking a lot about things like Tim Duncan's love of t-shirts, Allen Iverson's baggy shorts, and Kobe Bryant's tights.

What gives?

Well, it seems that the clothes on the body of NBA players--on and off the court--have become one of the minor skirmishes of some larger culture wars.

It started with David Stern's stern new business-casual dress code, which essentially banned baggy jeans, throwback jerseys, do-rags, and medallions. Then it transitioned gamely into an epidemic of on-the-court infractions--namely players being fined $10,000 for wearing the same shorts they have worn their entire careers.

And today this issue takes over the sports section of The New York Times, where Allen Iverson's long-shorted crotch is filling 50% of the available space above the fold. The accompanying story (which is in TimesSelect, so most won't be able to read it, which sucks) is columnist Selena Roberts admonishing David Stern to cease and desist in his wish to make NBA players dress like white kids from several decades ago. (Roberts quotes Jermaine O'Neal wondering where all this is headed--will cornrows be banned next?)

Her column closes with this:

Stern created the N.B.A.'s star factory, but he doesn't seem to like the hip, young product now. He wants to go retro. He wants to go back to a time before players were outsized celebrities, back to a period even before Jordan, Bird and Magic.

In micromanaging his players' images, right down to their shorts, Stern is asking them to live up to the silhouetted image of a great player who retired in 1974.

Instead of using Jerry West as a template, Stern should update the logo - and his short-sighted thinking.

I am one hundred percent on board with the idea that Stern has the right to crack the wardrobe whip. But I am one hundred percent against the idea that it is smart to do so.

The reason why is Richard Jefferson. Basically, he's one of the guys who is PR ready. He's smart, funny, and relates easily to everyone. He goes to the parties to woo the season ticket holders. He's what David Stern would seem to want. Yet the other night he showed up for work in a button-down shirt--as specified by the league--over which he wore a regular old t-shirt, as a plain f-you to the league.

Alienating the Richard Jeffersons of the league is not the way to clean up the league's image in the long run. It's a way to set up a little popularity contest between the league's fashion sense (that would be the "dorky lawyer in suit" look) and that of the players, many of whom are international cultural icons.

Hmm... wonder who's going to win.

And as long as we're talking about men with bad fashion sense, we have to acknowledge this e-mail from TrueHoop reader "Mr. Brown":

What the hell is Kobe wearing tights for? Is it for looks, performance enhancement or both. Who makes them? Will the league let him continue to wear them? Did you see his get-up on last Thursday?: tights with white piping down the sides and the ends of purple gym shorts dangling beneath his yellow uni shorts on top of those Andy Warholish Nikes! Phew!

The story from the beginning was that he was trying to stay warm. YAYsports! has been all over this, and now it seems like it might have more to do with selling weird new sports products for Nike.

I lived in Greenwich Village long enough to know that there is every different kind of costume out there, and people will wear them all. It's kind of fun. But as one ponders the big picture of life--birth, death, and everything in between--I really don't give a rat's ass about the clothes that strangers wear.

Yet strange things happen. And suddenly, through my love of the NBA, I find myself thinking a lot about things like Tim Duncan's love of t-shirts, Allen Iverson's baggy shorts, and Kobe Bryant's tights.

What gives?

Well, it seems that the clothes on the body of NBA players--on and off the court--have become one of the minor skirmishes of some larger culture wars.

It started with David Stern's stern new business-casual dress code, which essentially banned baggy jeans, throwback jerseys, do-rags, and medallions. Then it transitioned gamely into an epidemic of on-the-court infractions--namely players being fined $10,000 for wearing the same shorts they have worn their entire careers.

And today this issue takes over the sports section of The New York Times, where Allen Iverson's long-shorted crotch is filling 50% of the available space above the fold. The accompanying story (which is in TimesSelect, so most won't be able to read it, which sucks) is columnist Selena Roberts admonishing David Stern to cease and desist in his wish to make NBA players dress like white kids from several decades ago. (Roberts quotes Jermaine O'Neal wondering where all this is headed--will cornrows be banned next?)

Her column closes with this:

Stern created the N.B.A.'s star factory, but he doesn't seem to like the hip, young product now. He wants to go retro. He wants to go back to a time before players were outsized celebrities, back to a period even before Jordan, Bird and Magic.

In micromanaging his players' images, right down to their shorts, Stern is asking them to live up to the silhouetted image of a great player who retired in 1974.

Instead of using Jerry West as a template, Stern should update the logo - and his short-sighted thinking.

I am one hundred percent on board with the idea that Stern has the right to crack the wardrobe whip. But I am one hundred percent against the idea that it is smart to do so.

The reason why is Richard Jefferson. Basically, he's one of the guys who is PR ready. He's smart, funny, and relates easily to everyone. He goes to the parties to woo the season ticket holders. He's what David Stern would seem to want. Yet the other night he showed up for work in a button-down shirt--as specified by the league--over which he wore a regular old t-shirt, as a plain f-you to the league.

Alienating the Richard Jeffersons of the league is not the way to clean up the league's image in the long run. It's a way to set up a little popularity contest between the league's fashion sense (that would be the "dorky lawyer in suit" look) and that of the players, many of whom are international cultural icons.

Hmm... wonder who's going to win.

And as long as we're talking about men with bad fashion sense, we have to acknowledge this e-mail from TrueHoop reader "Mr. Brown":

What the hell is Kobe wearing tights for? Is it for looks, performance enhancement or both. Who makes them? Will the league let him continue to wear them? Did you see his get-up on last Thursday?: tights with white piping down the sides and the ends of purple gym shorts dangling beneath his yellow uni shorts on top of those Andy Warholish Nikes! Phew!

The story from the beginning was that he was trying to stay warm. YAYsports! has been all over this, and now it seems like it might have more to do with selling weird new sports products for Nike.

I lived in Greenwich Village long enough to know that there is every different kind of costume out there, and people will wear them all. It's kind of fun. But as one ponders the big picture of life--birth, death, and everything in between--I really don't give a rat's ass about the clothes that strangers wear.

Yet strange things happen. And suddenly, through my love of the NBA, I find myself thinking a lot about things like Tim Duncan's love of t-shirts, Allen Iverson's baggy shorts, and Kobe Bryant's tights.

What gives?

Well, it seems that the clothes on the body of NBA players--on and off the court--have become one of the minor skirmishes of some larger culture wars.

It started with David Stern's stern new business-casual dress code, which essentially banned baggy jeans, throwback jerseys, do-rags, and medallions. Then it transitioned gamely into an epidemic of on-the-court infractions--namely players being fined $10,000 for wearing the same shorts they have worn their entire careers.

And today this issue takes over the sports section of The New York Times, where Allen Iverson's long-shorted crotch is filling 50% of the available space above the fold. The accompanying story (which is in TimesSelect, so most won't be able to read it, which sucks) is columnist Selena Roberts admonishing David Stern to cease and desist in his wish to make NBA players dress like white kids from several decades ago. (Roberts quotes Jermaine O'Neal wondering where all this is headed--will cornrows be banned next?)

Her column closes with this:

Stern created the N.B.A.'s star factory, but he doesn't seem to like the hip, young product now. He wants to go retro. He wants to go back to a time before players were outsized celebrities, back to a period even before Jordan, Bird and Magic.

In micromanaging his players' images, right down to their shorts, Stern is asking them to live up to the silhouetted image of a great player who retired in 1974.

Instead of using Jerry West as a template, Stern should update the logo - and his short-sighted thinking.

I am one hundred percent on board with the idea that Stern has the right to crack the wardrobe whip. But I am one hundred percent against the idea that it is smart to do so.

The reason why is Richard Jefferson. Basically, he's one of the guys who is PR ready. He's smart, funny, and relates easily to everyone. He goes to the parties to woo the season ticket holders. He's what David Stern would seem to want. Yet the other night he showed up for work in a button-down shirt--as specified by the league--over which he wore a regular old t-shirt, as a plain f-you to the league.

Alienating the Richard Jeffersons of the league is not the way to clean up the league's image in the long run. It's a way to set up a little popularity contest between the league's fashion sense (that would be the "dorky lawyer in suit" look) and that of the players, many of whom are international cultural icons.

Hmm... wonder who's going to win.

And as long as we're talking about men with bad fashion sense, we have to acknowledge this e-mail from TrueHoop reader "Mr. Brown":

What the hell is Kobe wearing tights for? Is it for looks, performance enhancement or both. Who makes them? Will the league let him continue to wear them? Did you see his get-up on last Thursday?: tights with white piping down the sides and the ends of purple gym shorts dangling beneath his yellow uni shorts on top of those Andy Warholish Nikes! Phew!

The story from the beginning was that he was trying to stay warm. YAYsports! has been all over this, and now it seems like it might have more to do with selling weird new sports products for Nike.

I lived in Greenwich Village long enough to know that there is every different kind of costume out there, and people will wear them all. It's kind of fun. But as one ponders the big picture of life--birth, death, and everything in between--I really don't give a rat's ass about the clothes that strangers wear.

Yet strange things happen. And suddenly, through my love of the NBA, I find myself thinking a lot about things like Tim Duncan's love of t-shirts, Allen Iverson's baggy shorts, and Kobe Bryant's tights.

What gives?

Well, it seems that the clothes on the body of NBA players--on and off the court--have become one of the minor skirmishes of some larger culture wars.

It started with David Stern's stern new business-casual dress code, which essentially banned baggy jeans, throwback jerseys, do-rags, and medallions. Then it transitioned gamely into an epidemic of on-the-court infractions--namely players being fined $10,000 for wearing the same shorts they have worn their entire careers.

And today this issue takes over the sports section of The New York Times, where Allen Iverson's long-shorted crotch is filling 50% of the available space above the fold. The accompanying story (which is in TimesSelect, so most won't be able to read it, which sucks) is columnist Selena Roberts admonishing David Stern to cease and desist in his wish to make NBA players dress like white kids from several decades ago. (Roberts quotes Jermaine O'Neal wondering where all this is headed--will cornrows be banned next?)

Her column closes with this:

Stern created the N.B.A.'s star factory, but he doesn't seem to like the hip, young product now. He wants to go retro. He wants to go back to a time before players were outsized celebrities, back to a period even before Jordan, Bird and Magic.

In micromanaging his players' images, right down to their shorts, Stern is asking them to live up to the silhouetted image of a great player who retired in 1974.

Instead of using Jerry West as a template, Stern should update the logo - and his short-sighted thinking.

I am one hundred percent on board with the idea that Stern has the right to crack the wardrobe whip. But I am one hundred percent against the idea that it is smart to do so.

The reason why is Richard Jefferson. Basically, he's one of the guys who is PR ready. He's smart, funny, and relates easily to everyone. He goes to the parties to woo the season ticket holders. He's what David Stern would seem to want. Yet the other night he showed up for work in a button-down shirt--as specified by the league--over which he wore a regular old t-shirt, as a plain f-you to the league.

Alienating the Richard Jeffersons of the league is not the way to clean up the league's image in the long run. It's a way to set up a little popularity contest between the league's fashion sense (that would be the "dorky lawyer in suit" look) and that of the players, many of whom are international cultural icons.

Hmm... wonder who's going to win.

And as long as we're talking about men with bad fashion sense, we have to acknowledge this e-mail from TrueHoop reader "Mr. Brown":

What the hell is Kobe wearing tights for? Is it for looks, performance enhancement or both. Who makes them? Will the league let him continue to wear them? Did you see his get-up on last Thursday?: tights with white piping down the sides and the ends of purple gym shorts dangling beneath his yellow uni shorts on top of those Andy Warholish Nikes! Phew!

The story from the beginning was that he was trying to stay warm. YAYsports! has been all over this, and now it seems like it might have more to do with selling weird new sports products for Nike.

Those rah-rah lawyer articles are so rarely convincing. But here's one worth taking a look at.

Those rah-rah lawyer articles are so rarely convincing. But here's one worth taking a look at.

Those rah-rah lawyer articles are so rarely convincing. But here's one worth taking a look at.

Those rah-rah lawyer articles are so rarely convincing. But here's one worth taking a look at.