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You can't fire the owners either

In wishing us all the best in 2004, Page 2's Bill Simmons also wants something else -- for owners stop being so damn clueless.

Updated: May 31, 2005, 2:20 PM ET
By Bill Simmons | Page 2 columnist

Editor's Note: This column appears in the Jan. 5 edition of ESPN The Magazine.

Because it's the holidays, and this is allegedly a sports column, you might expect me to fill the space with a list of "wacky" gifts or "absurd" predictions for athletes. Well, I wouldn't do that to you. I hate gimmicks almost as much as I hate WNBA scores on the 10-minute ticker.

Still, I think I'm allowed one sports wish for the upcoming year. And I think it should be something original ...

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