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The rest in the West

After dealing with the NBA's train wreck East, Bill Simmons moves on to the Western Conference.

Updated: May 31, 2005, 2:26 PM ET
By Bill Simmons | Page 2

When I'm running ESPN some day, I plan on switching our announcers to different sports for November sweeps. Imagine Joe Theismann broadcasting NBA games, saying things like "You're not gonna last too long in the National Basketball Association by making passes like that" and "I want to tell you guys something, that turnover was caused by the defensive pressure of assistant coach Dick Harter, who's been doing an extra-ORDINARY job all game"? Comedy would ensue. Everyone would live happily ever ...

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