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Reason and madness in English soccer

Updated: March 3, 2011, 12:50 PM ET
By James Martin

Imagine if Charlie Sheen lived under the auspices of the English FA. In such a world, the authorities wouldn't take his children away but, rather, would pat him on the back for his forward-thinking family model. Two goddesses and a boy -- brilliant, Charlie! And he wouldn't get kicked off his sitcom. Instead, the producers might just sack all the other actors and turn the camera on Chuck, 24-7. Reality TV is more unpredictable and dramatic, anyway. There would be no passing of judgment, ...

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