Via con dios, Chilly. In the wake of a disappointing 3-7 start, Brad Childress was fired as head coach of the Minnesota Vikings. So what's next for everyone's favorite Tony Kornheiser lookalike? (Note: favorite and only).
Page 2 offers a handful of suggested second careers:
Editor, Vogue magazine: Cold, distant management style not only accepted and encouraged, but also could become basis for best-selling book/hit movie.
Professional wrestler: As confrontation with Percy Harvin made clear, understands how to come as close as possible to a physical altercation without having an actual fight.
Spokesman, National Association of Catering Executives: Proven track record of standing up for the industry.
Motivational author: Hey, if Isiah Thomas can do it, anyone can.
Airport shuttle bus driver: Hattiesburg, Miss., only.
Page 2 contributor: It would be nice -- soul-affirming, even -- to have someone else on staff who loves Brett Favre almost as much as we do.
President, United States of America: Has shown ability to ineffectually preside over dysfunctional organization beset by ego-driven conflict and chronic inability to place long-term benefit ahead of short-term gratification for fear of antagonizing fickle constituents; more importantly, has shown outstanding ability to act as unifying, common denominator scapegoat. Chilly in 2012!