Santa needs your help -- and he doesn't care how red your nose gets after you've had too much liquid holiday cheer at the office Christmas party. Santa doesn't need your nose but he does need your sense of nosiness.
He needs help putting together the Sports Section of his annual "Naughty List," and he refuses to ask WikiLeaks.
He's asking you, and I'm Santa's Helper on this one. That means you should send your nominations for "Sports Top Ten Naughty List For Santa" to firstname.lastname@example.org. Please include a sentence explaining why your choice deserves to be on the list (and we like "funny" or at least "snarky"). Also we need your first name, initial of your last name and your location.
By the way, Santa has disqualified three names: LeBron James, Ben Roethlisberger and Tiger Woods.
Don't bother nominating any of the Big Three because Santa already has made his decision about them. This doesn't mean they already are on Santa's Naughty List because that list is even more confidential than the names of baseball players who tested positive for steroids in the Mitchell Commission report. Santa just wants you to use your imagination and not make the easy choice.
So give it some thought. From last Christmas until right now, who has been truly naughty in the sporting world? Who deserves a lump of coal from Santa? And don't you dare suggest the Chilean miners.
Santa has a lot of packing to do so you have until noon Wednesday to send your suggestions to email@example.com. The Naughty List will be presented here Thursday because Santa checks Page 2 everyday of the year no matter how busy he might be.