Kurt Snibbe's Page 2 cartoon caption contest

Mon, Apr 16
6:53
AM ET

Take a shot at writing a cartoon caption. Page 2 cartoonist Kurt Snibbe will offer up a blank cartoon each weekday morning, and he will fill in the blank with our favorite reader submission at the end of the business day.

So please, by all means, share your humorous stylings in the comments section.


Monday's Web video of the day

Mon, Apr 16
6:53
AM ET

Things sure rock in Philadelphia these days, with the Flyers' explosive offense helping the team roll to a 3-0 series lead in the Stanley Cup Playoffs. So it's no wonder Philly-ites like goalie Sergei Bobrovsky are dancing (with a little editing help) to LMFAO's "Party Rock Anthem."

Have you seen a cool sports-related video that deserves to go viral? Email links to bypatrickdorsey(at)gmail(dot)com, or let us know on Twitter at @dorseypatrick. Videos should be SFW, recent and less than 2 minutes.

'Sunday Brunch' remakes 'Stooges' using athletes

Sun, Apr 15
Apr
15
Dwyane Wade and LeBron JamesMike Coppola/Getty ImagesIt's Dwyane Wade and LeBron James in a remake of "Three Stooges"? Who is Moe? Read below.

"Nyuk-nyuk."

Always wanted to start a column that way and never thought the opportunity would arise, but the recreation of "The Three Stooges" has presented the chance. Not sure how well the movie will do as the critics are being unkind. But if it does poorly, the main reason could be obvious:

Poor casting.

Nothing against the actors chosen but they are not exactly celebrities even though "Larry, Curly and Moe" are running away with the last Page 2 poll of picking your favorite "Big Three." What we should have polled is who would you have hired from the world of sports to portray the stooges? Here are a few suggestions:

• LeBron James, Dwyane Wade and, no, not Chris Bosh, but Pat Riley, who would be a natural as Moe.

• Rex Ryan, Mark Sanchez and Tim Tebow. (Don't get outraged, Tebowites, 'cause he'd probably love it.)

• Stan Van Gundy, Dwight Howard and Jeff Van Gundy. (I'd pay to see this version.)

• John Daly, John Daly and John Daly.

And in all these versions, a special cameo appearance by Charles Barkley as Shemp. Hey, he's playing a good-looking woman in a commercial so who says he can't handle being the forgotten Stooge?

Read More »

Sunday's Web video of the day

Sun, Apr 15
Apr
15

How do you make a wheelchair go 150 miles per hour? By having pro skydiver Eric Finn fall from the heavens in one, a crazy stunt performed to raise awareness for NextStep's Wheelchair for a Day charity challenge.

Have you seen a cool sports-related video that deserves to go viral? Email links to bypatrickdorsey(at)gmail(dot)com, or let us know on Twitter at @dorseypatrick. Videos should be SFW, recent and lesst="new"> than 2 minutes.

Marv Levy, Haven Moses make All-Tax Team

Sat, Apr 14
Apr
14

As inevitable things go, it's not as bad as death. Is it?

We'll try to make this as little of an imposition as possible. No forms to be filled out here. And we hope it's not as complicated as the directions on that other thing you'll be dealing with this weekend. It's Page 2's All-Tax Team.

Ira Bowman: The longtime pro basketball player, who logged 13 seasons in the NBA and other leagues, attended the University of Pennsylvania, known for its prestigious Wharton School of Business. He therefore knows his first name is shorthand for the Individual Retirement Account, a savings plan with substantial tax benefit.

Marv Levy: The Hall of Fame football coach's last name is a verb that means to impose and collect. But the dreaded day associated with Levy came not in mid-April but in late August, when the final roster cuts came down in the NFL.

Haven Moses: With a first name like that, perhaps the wide receiver should have played for the Dolphins, Seahawks, Cowboys or another team housed in a jurisdiction without state income taxes. Alas, Haven found no tax haven in New York or Colorado between 1968-81, where he resided while playing for the Bills and Broncos.

Spike Owen: As far as we know, no figure in sports history has a last name that resembles "Refund." But there are plenty of Owens. Among them this shortstop, a Texan whose full name is Spike Dee Owen, who played for a bevy of MLB teams from 1983-95.

"Double Duty" Radcliffe: In a taxation sense, this is pretty much what happens to every paycheck you get: The feds and your home state get their cut. In baseball history, Theodore Roosevelt Radcliffe acquired his nickname from legendary writer Damon Runyon, who praised Radcliffe's ability to pitch one game and catch the other in a Negro League World Series doubleheader in 1932. The moniker stuck. Just like the government's insistence on taking its cut.

Saturday's Web video of the day

Sat, Apr 14
Apr
14

Quebec City! A historic place, to be sure. But it's no match for (future professional Ultimate player) Brodie Smith and his buddies, who are clad in Nordique shirts and game to perform their trademark Frisbee trick shots in the city and inside an arena.

Kurt Snibbe's Page 2 cartoon caption winner

Fri, Apr 13
Apr
13


Earlier today, we posted a blank cartoon and readers offered their captions. Our favorite was by commenter cbt711. Please check your ESPN.com profile message center for an email.

Thanks for participating. Check back tomorrow for another cartoon.

Cee Lo Green provides ESPN's NFL Draft theme

Fri, Apr 13
Apr
13


Today, ESPN debuts its 2012 NFL Draft promotional campaign with a spot titled NFL Draft, Big City.

Set against the bright lights of the New York City skyline, the spot will promote the network's primetime presentation of the NFL Draft, April 26-28.

The spot features four of the marquee 2012 NFL Draft prospects: quarterbacks Andrew Luck (Stanford) and Robert Griffin III (Baylor), running back Trent Richardson (Alabama) and wide receiver Justin Blackmon (Oklahoma State).

The players appear on top of skyscrapers with neon and flashing lights as the backdrop. Images of the lights, the expectant Draft prospects and the song "Bright Lights, Bigger City" by singer-songwriter Cee Lo Green, combine to capture the essence of the Draft on ESPN.

• Click here to read the full post on ESPN Front Row.

Clemson's Lee Brice will sing No. 1 song at FSU

Fri, Apr 13
Apr
13
Lee BriceAP Photo/Chris PizzelloLee Brice, former football player at Clemson, is playing at FSU's spring game this weekend.

Country singer Lee Brice, who has the No. 1 song on the country charts with "A Woman Like You," is headlining Florida State University's spring football kickoff concert Friday in Tallahassee.

Yes, the former University of Clemson long snapper is singing on enemy territory.

"Hey, at least it's still the ACC!" said Brice, who had to give up football 10 years ago because of an arm injury and turned to music. "This state and fans have always been really good to me. It's a beautiful day down here."

And it should be for Brice. He's been on a roll lately, with his first No. 1 hit, along with recently picking up "Song of the Year" at the ACM Awards for co-writing Eli Young Band's hit "Crazy Girl."

And, in January, Brice popped the question to Sara Reeveley, who he has known for 13 years. The two have a 3-year-old son, Takoda.

"I'm in the best place in my life right now. My priorities have changed in the past year. It still fun to go out and party, but I have a boy and a fiancee now," said the 32-year-old Brice, who grew up in Sumter, S.C. "I'm happier than I've ever been. I can always be a wild man but I'm in a different place."

And does he still miss football?

"Playing this spring game event is like the first time I ran down the hill at Clemson for the Orange and White Game," Brice said. "I still miss football. But I knew if I couldn't make it in football, that I'd make it in music. And this is just the beginning for me."

Sports prophecies that weren't seen by Dale Jr.

Fri, Apr 13
Apr
13

Yes, Dale Earnhardt Jr. knows he hasn't won a NASCAR Sprint Cup race in his past 135 tries.

Fortunately for him, the topic of his slide has gotten so stale that he doesn't even field that many inquiries about it these days.

Dale Earnhardt Jr.
Andrew Weber/US PresswireWith shades like that, it is no wonder Dale Earnhardt Jr. can't see the future too well.

"People know I'm not Nostradamus, so they don't ask me questions about the future."

Well, of course we know YOU'RE not Nostradamus. We don't have to come to you to have our fortunes told. That's the beauty of the 16th-century seer. All his predictions are written down. Study them long enough, and the patterns emerge.

Amazingly, scholars show that ol' Nosey pinpointed the number 135 will have particular resonance in the sports world of 2012: For example:

• Starting at this summer's race in Loudon, N.H., Danica Patrick will begin an astonishing 135-race win streak on the Nationwide circuit.

• Chris Singleton, who came up snake-eyes when he dropped $10,000 on Mega Millions tickets during the mega-jackpot frenzy, will win a $135 million Powerball jackpot. He'll use that money to buy a piece of the Washington Wizards so as an owner he can engineer a trade of himself to the Lakers.

• Because NFL refs will be flag-happy when it comes to monitoring late hits by the Saints, the New Orleans defense will average 135 yards in penalties per game.

• The Kentucky Derby will be won be a horse with 135-to-1 odds.

• Dwight Howard will give up trying to get Stan Van Gundy fired after 135 requests.

• Baylor athletics will have 135 major recruiting violations that the NCAA will never find out about.

• The 2012 Texas Rangers will go 135-27.

• The 2012 Boston Red Sox will go 27-135.

Oh, one last thing, Dale:

Nostradamus sees big things for you and your winless streak around No. 223 or so. Hang in there!

Check out Stevan Ridley on this #followfriday

Fri, Apr 13
Apr
13
Stevan RidleyAP Photo/Elise AmendolaNew England Patriots running back Stevan Ridley loves having fun on Twitter.

Stevan Ridley was drafted by the New England Patriots in the third round of the NFL draft out of LSU in 2011. Ridley accumulated 441 rushing yards for the Patriots last season.

While Ridley may be second on the Patriots' running back depth chart, he's clearly the No. 1 option in social media.

On this #followfriday, check out the comedic stylings of @StevanRidley on Twitter.

@StevanRidley, NFL RB/Mario Kart 64 Undisputed Champ

Jordan Brand Classic stars talk on favorite shoes

Fri, Apr 13
Apr
13

Who led Beijing Ducks to Chinese basketball title?

Fri, Apr 13
Apr
13

Welcome back to another edition of Page 2 Jeopardy!, the quiz that tests your knowledge of sports, pop culture and assorted trivia. Please remember to phrase your responses in the form of a question.

(Correct questions at the end of the quiz.)

1. Answer: Athletes Thomas Trammell, Charles Smith, William Paris and Gerry Watson all have this in common.

2. Answer: This minor-league baseball team is giving away tree saplings Sunday in what is being called "Grow Your Own Bat Night."

3. Answer: They are the only two visiting pitchers to throw complete-game shutouts against the Rockies at Coors Field over the past 13 seasons.

4. Answer: After he led his Beijing Ducks to the championship of the Chinese Basketball Association recently, some of his ardent fans in Beijing have started a campaign to honor him with a bronze statue.

5. Answer: After a three-game, season-opening sweep of the Braves, Mets players received this special treat in the clubhouse after Game 3.

Question 1: What is the nickname Bubba?

Question 2: Who are the Tulsa Drillers?

Question 3: Who are Barry Zito and Roy Oswalt?

Question 4: Who is Stephon Marbury?

Question 5: What are cheeseburgers from Citi Field's Shake Shack?

Actor Brian Presley talks about movie 'Touchback'

Fri, Apr 13
Apr
13

As an athlete, how would you like to go back in time to change history on a football field?

That's what former high school football star turned farmer Scott Murphy (played by Brian Presley) does in the movie "Touchback," which is out Friday in select markets.

On the game-winning play, Murphy -- the nation's best high school football player -- injures his knee and destroys his dreams of a future in football. About 15 years later, Murphy receives the opportunity to go back to change history.

Presley knows the story all too well himself. The 34-year-old actor graduated from Jenks (Okla.) High School in 1996 after winning a state championship as starting quarterback. He turned to acting after his sports career.

"I fell in love with this story when I received the script," said Presley, who is known for his role of Jack Ramsey on the soap opera "Port Charles" from 1999 to 2003. "I saw so many similarities to what I went through. I know people will be able to identify with this. It's a love story."

Kurt Russell, Marc Blucas and Melanie Lynskey also are in the film, which was written and directed by Don Handfield.

The movie is a sports version of "It's a Wonderful Life," and Presley is hoping people who are not sports fans come out to watch.

"Football is an all-American sport, but the great thing about this movie is a lot of the action is away from the field," he said. "I thought the movie is very moving. It's about community. It's about family. It's about our country."

Kurt Snibbe's Page 2 cartoon caption contest

Fri, Apr 13
Apr
13

Take a shot at writing a cartoon caption. Page 2 cartoonist Kurt Snibbe will offer up a blank cartoon each weekday morning, and he will fill in the blank with our favorite reader submission at the end of the business day.

So please, by all means, share your humorous stylings in the comments section.


Nick Offerman recalls Rob Lowe's Twitter infamy

Fri, Apr 13
Apr
13
Nick Offerman
AP Photo/Matt Sayles"Parks and Recreation" star Nick Offerman was a spectator to the Rob Lowe-Peyton Manning escapade.

Remember when actor Rob Lowe inexplicably broke the news in January that Peyton Manning would never play football again? Lowe, a friend of Colts owner Jim Irsay, sent out a tweet on Jan. 18 that a reputable source told him Manning would retire later in the day.

Lowe's source, as it turns out, was wrong.

But it still provided an intense, interesting day for Lowe and his cast mates on Parks and Recreation, who were cramped in a campaign bus all day filming an episode that will air later this spring.

Nick Offerman, who plays Ron Swanson on the NBC comedy, describes the day to Page 2:

"In this episode we were all on the campaign bus. We had everybody, the whole cast, on the bus. Between takes it came out that this had happened and everybody was all atwitter about it, on their phones and what-not. Rob was talking about how he had inadvertently broken this huge story, and he had it from a very reputable source. But there was a sense of complicity among us on the bus where we all felt like we better keep our mouths shut. It was very hot information. We were sort of thrilled at the level of delicious gossip and at the same time everybody was kind of scared at this explosive, volatile information. And then afterward it turned out to be not true."

Friday's Web video of the day

Fri, Apr 13
Apr
13

Ever wonder what it's like to stand in the pocket while the pass rush thunders toward you? For those of us who never played quarterback -- beyond flag football, at least -- the Mean Green of North Texas provides you with a look, a helmet-cam shot from the QB position during offensive line/defensive line drills.

Have you seen a cool sports-related video that deserves to go viral? Email links to bypatrickdorsey(at)gmail(dot)com, or let us know on Twitter at @dorseypatrick. Videos should be SFW, recent and lesst="new"> than 2 minutes.


Kurt Snibbe's Page 2 cartoon caption winner

Thu, Apr 12
Apr
12


Earlier today, we posted a blank cartoon and readers offered their captions. Our favorite was by commenter Map-Man. Please check your ESPN.com profile message center for an email.

Thanks for participating. Check back tomorrow for another cartoon.

Matt Kemp talks about customized Playstation 3

Thu, Apr 12
Apr
12
Matt KempSonyMatt Kemp boasts one of the sweetest customized video game setups I've ever seen.

Matt Kemp sees himself in Sony's "MLB 12: The Show" and all he can do is grin.

"They have my batting stance down perfect. They have my swing. It's me in that game," Kemp tells me with a laugh. "And he's a pretty good looking dude ... at least I would say so."

And when Sony found out that Kemp and his Los Angeles crew of gamers have been playing "The Show" since the game hit last month, the company presented Kemp with his very own customized PlayStation 3 that looks like it was made out of the slugger's wood bat, complete with baseball-themed controller, a new Vita, and a sweet PlayStation case that even features it's own foul line.

"This thing is so pretty, I don't even want to take it out of the box," Kemp says, still in awe by the lavish gift. "It's wood grain with my signature on it. It's one of the coolest systems I've ever seen. This thing even has grass and fake dirt surrounding it. It's unbelievable."

Jon Robinson: Are you a big video game player?

Matt Kemp: I used to be bigger into playing, but I still play a little bit. It's tough during the season to find as much time as I want to play video games, and when I do get some free time, I like to sleep. But there are a lot of Dodgers who are into that new Vita system. They're playing "MLB 12: The Show" all the time. They're always playing against each other.

First time I went on "The Show," I couldn't believe how accurate they have everything. From the stadiums to all of the batting stances, it feels like you're actually watching a game.

Jon Robinson: Did you play a lot of the baseball video games as a kid?

Matt Kemp: I did, but my mom and my grandma used to make me go outside and play a lot. So I'd have to go over to my friend's house to play video games. If I was at my house, my parents and my grandparents made me go out and play, and I'm glad they did that because it helped make me who I am today, playing big league baseball, so I'm good for that.

But I remember how much I loved the Sega Genesis and "Sonic The Hedgehog" and Nintendo with "Super Mario Bros." Those were my games. My favorite game that I used to love was "NBA Jam." That was the Sega Genesis game I couldn't get enough of. With all the players jumping so high and doing flips and dunking, that was my game. "NBA Jam" was so dope. He's on fire! [laughs]

Read More »

Karl Ravech, John Kruk have fun as Three Stooges

Thu, Apr 12
Apr
12
by ESPN

ESPN's Karl Ravech and John Kruk perform Three Stooges antics and the Farrelly brothers talk about their movie "The Three Stooges", the Red Sox and "Dumb and Dumber 2".

Mark Buerhle injury inspires some first aid advice

Thu, Apr 12
Apr
12

By now, everyone's had a good laugh/cringe at how Marlins left-hander Mark Buehrle cut the thumb on his throwing hand opening a jar of mayonnaise while trying to make a sandwich before his start last week.

Mark Buehrle
Joel Auerbach/Getty ImagesIt's OK, Mark. Just put a (bacon) Band-Aid on it.

Well, if it happened to one major-leaguer, it can happen again. So clubhouses, be prepared -- either have the right medical equipment on hand, turn this into a marketing partnership, or both.

Commissioner Selig, now is the time to step up and insist that all future sandwich-related injuries be treated using "Bacon Strips Adhesive Bandages." Available on Amazon.com, or just about anywhere else on the Internet where you can find medical advice. (Disclaimer: Page 2 is prohibited from dispensing medical advice by the American Medical Association, the Centers For Disease Control and anyone who's had to make use of your mom's Band-Aid drawer).

So, Buehrle, good luck with your next jar of mayo and/or your next bacon bandage. Speaking of mayo and bacon, have you tried Baconnaise? Though as a professional athlete watching his diet, you'd probably want to reach for Baconnaise Lite.

A plan for Dwyane Wade's Olympic payday

Thu, Apr 12
Apr
12
Dwyane WadeAP Photo/Dusan VranicDwyane Wade may or may not wish to be compensated for playing basketball for the United States.

Montgomery Burns protege/basketball star Dwyane Wade said on Tuesday that he wants a payday for playing in the Olympics this summer, saying, ""It's a lot of things you do for the Olympics -- a lot of jerseys you sell." Though the jerseys are made by Nike, who already shells him $12 million a year as a brand representative, he would like some additional money on top of that. Also not sufficient is the $25,000 he'd receive for taking home gold, which I suppose is fair considering the Argentineans are a serious threat to snatch that from him a la 2004.

But to paraphrase Latrell Sprewell, he's got a family to feed, so we think it's only fair that Flash get some extra pocket money for the inconvenience of representing our proud nation on the global stage.

In a press statement Thursday, Wade said, "I do not want to be paid to go to the Olympics." Once he's there, however, payments may be delivered via direct deposit or wheelbarrow.

We're willing to pony up a little bit of Page 2's modest editorial budget to help him get what he's owed, just as long as he completes a few Olympic challenges for our twisted amusement.

• For $16.38: Wear the same pantsuit as the Queen at the opening ceremony.

• For $5.20: Beat a male gymnast in a pull-up contest.

• For $33.02: Finish a Greco-Roman Boilermaker* without gagging (*drop a shot of Baileys and Rulon Gardner's detached frostbite toe into a pint of stout and chug).

• For £9.39: Use mental math to convert $15 into pounds.

• For $78.83: Put your hand on Marta Karolyi's thigh while Bela is watching.

• For $40.31: Corner Bob Costas and ask him what we've all been wondering: Is he Benjamin Buttoning into a Cabbage Patch Kid?

• For $21.41: Frogger your way through a fencing bout wearing only a blindfold and a rain poncho.

For $.25: Win a gold, be dignified about it, and just be thankful you're not Antoine Walker.

Kentucky tops unofficial recruiting rankings

Thu, Apr 12
Apr
12

College basketball signing day was on Wednesday. Here are the official Page 2 rankings of the best recruit classes.

Noel Nerlens
Courtesy of Dave TelepNerlens Noel announced his intention to attend Kentucky via his hair.

1. Kentucky -- Nerlens Noel is a great high school player, but the best part about Noel is that he announced his decision with his hair. That's the kind of thing that earns the top spot in the Page 2 College Basketball Recruit Rankings. In fact, much of our best writing here is submitted via scalp. True story. But with Noel in the fold at Kentucky, one obvious question is raised: Where will he land in the 2013 NBA Draft? Look for the Bobcats and Wizards to still be in position to grab the No. 1 overall pick then.

2. UCLA -- Coach Ben Howland reeled in Shabazz Muhammad who was rated the second-best player in the nation. It's a great signing for Howland. Muhammad is a talent who obviously keeps his focus on basketball instead of wasting his time with stuff like reading or doing research.

3. Pitt -- Pitt is 13th in the official ESPN rankings, but they're three here for one reason: 6-foot-10 New Zealand recruit Steven Adams. Look at him here, here and here. Notice the similarity? Yes, college basketball finally has its replacement for this guy. Add to it Pitt's NCAA tournament track record, and we have a great chance to see some on-court tears.

4. Michigan -- The Wolverines brought in a good class in Mitch McGary and Glenn Robinson III. Robinson is the son of former Purdue and Bucks star Glenn Robinson, and will team with Tim Hardaway Jr. to give Michigan a great inside-outside combo of making you feel old.

5. Duke -- The Blue Devils have no recruits in the ESPN Top 10 and only one in the Top 25. This is obviously a Duke recruiting class many college basketball fans will rank as their favorite.

Kevin Durant debuts shoes to support charity

Thu, Apr 12
Apr
12

During Wednesday night's game between the Oklahoma City Thunder and Los Angeles Clippers, Kevin Durant debuted his Nike N7 Zoom KDIV shoes -- a new line with charity in mind.

The shoes support N7, a program and fund dedicated to giving access to sports and physical activity for Native American and Aboriginal communities, focusing especially on youth -- a cause of particular importance in Oklahoma. The shoes will be available for purchase later this spring. You can learn more about the shoes and the fund here.

Kevin DurantAP Photo/Sue Ogrocki

Readers give reasons to watch NHL playoffs

Thu, Apr 12
Apr
12

Kurt Snibbe's Page 2 cartoon caption contest

Thu, Apr 12
Apr
12

Take a shot at writing a cartoon caption. Page 2 cartoonist Kurt Snibbe will offer up a blank cartoon each weekday morning, and he will fill in the blank with our favorite reader submission at the end of the business day.

So please, by all means, share your humorous stylings in the comments section.


Thursday's Web video of the day

Thu, Apr 12
Apr
12

The San Jose Sharks start their Stanley Cup Playoffs journey tonight, and it might be an uphill one -- so perhaps the seven-seeds need a secret weapon against the St. Louis Blues. Recently, they got a look at one possiblity: Nyjer Morgan, a.k.a. Tony Plush -- currently of the Milwaukee Brewers, formerly of the junior hockey Regina Pats. Take a behind-the-scenes tour courtesy of The NOC, as he goes skating with the Sharks.

Have you seen a cool sports-related video that deserves to go viral? Email links to bypatrickdorsey(at)gmail(dot)com, or let us know on Twitter at @dorseypatrick. Videos should be SFW, recent and lesst="new"> than 2 minutes.


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