It's the truth. No other sporting venue is anything like Augusta National Golf Club, once again this week serving as the lord and master of the Masters Golf Tournament. If you have never been there, you just don't know.
The polarizing difference is that there are no females among the approximately 300 members. But that is hardly the only difference. The Masters has rules for your conduct.
• There is no running. Make a dash to reach the first tee before Tiger Woods tees off and you can (and probably will) be dismissed from the grounds. If you need to find a portable restroom, plan ahead.
• No electronics. I know, how will you survive? Imagine, a four-day tournament and you can't call, you can't text and you can't tweet. Hardly makes it worthwhile.
• No cap on your head backwards. Be civilized.
• And it doesn't affect you but all caddies must wear those hideous white jumpsuits. If you ask me, some August National member must be in the white jumpsuit business.
As you can see, it's a bitter-sweet mixture of intolerance and charm. Beyond that, Augusta National feels and sounds different. It really does. When the crowd roars, it sounds unlike any other crowd. And in between roars, everybody is hushed. That's right. You speak in hushed tones. Why? Beats me.
That leads us to the topic for this week's reader-generated list: "Top 10 Comments Overheard At The Masters." Use your imagination. If we could eavesdrop on everyone, what's the most humorous stuff we might hear? Is it something funny said by a player, an official, a fan, or maybe a caddy commenting on those white jumpsuits? Anyone's conversation is fair game although we must remain fairly clean.
Send your entries, one or more, to firstname.lastname@example.org. Please include your first name, initial of your last name and your location because, if you don't, you may miss out on the glory of being included in the list Thursday. Your deadline is noon Wednesday.
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