February 20, 2003
Mike Riley:
Back to Oregon State, even though he bolted the Beavers for the NFL after a stellar 8-14 record. "Same old, same old" coaching carousel continues.
The Lead Item
Two Words For You:

The hours leading up to today's 3 p.m. NBA trading deadline have been so slow that we resort to fantasizing about "dream trades," like Jennifer "Alias" Garner for Sarah Michelle "Buffy" Gellar or super-sized "Idol" star Ruben for Justin, last year's wimpy runner-up. Keep reading for the hottest news for the day, plus a few trade scenarios we'd like to see:

Unstoppable Kobe
Simply put, Kobe Bryant is the most "must-see" attraction in sports right now. At times versus the Jazz last night, his performance wasn't pretty, but he got his 40 -- and the Lakers won the game 93-87.

Poster this: Kobe's dunk on Yao Tuesday might have been the Ultimate Posterizing, but his twisty-turny, pump-Harpring-and-Kirilenko-right-out-of-the-picture jump shot was the thinking fan's Play of the Year.

Trade proposal: Here's the thing: right now, there isn't a player in the league -- not T-Mac, not Duncan, not even LeBron -- who is worthy of being traded for Kobe. And, frankly, even if the Lakers had the talent on hand to make a trade for a complementary scorer (like Atlanta's Jason Terry), why would you want to disrupt Kobe's momentum?

Trade Yawners
Jerry West needed a proven scorer for the Grizzlies. He had a log-jam at power forward. Those have to be the only reasons he went against one of the cardinal trade rules and swapped big for small, rookie Drew Gooden to Orlando for small forward Mike Miller. So much for that rep as a draft guru.

I'm Trade Hungry, Get Me Out of Here! But at least West did something, unlike the other gun-shy GMs out there. Does it sound like I'm goading? (I am.) Come on: Let's see some intrigue! A trade for trade's sake! Something!

Trade proposal: Jerry Krause covets Eddie Jones. Pat Riley looks pretty miserable with the Heat. There's an obvious deal here: Krause, his guy Jamal Crawford and an international player of mystery for Riles, Caron Butler and a condo on Chicago's Michigan Ave.

If the Cameron Crazies are worth 15 points, like the conventional wisdom says they are, then Duke's 75-70 win over Maryland wasn't that impressive The problem for the Blue Devils is that they can't replicate Cameron

1. Ephedrine for players' health: Is union balking?
2. Autographs for fan loyalty: D-Backs' model plan
3. McGahee for 2nd-round pick: Says he'll be '03-ready
1. Louisville for Final Four: Loses to Memphis at home
2. LeBron's 23 for immortality: SVSM to retire jersey
3. Price for anyone but Bills: Peerless "franchised"
away from home, which is why they won't do any serious (read: Final Four) damage in the NCAA Tourney this season.

Trade proposal: Both games of the fizzling UNC-Duke rivalry plus any UCLA game for a single game of the four times Maryland and Duke might match up in a given season (Regular season (2), ACC Tourney, NCAA Tourney).

Jeter vs. Steinbrenner
George Steinbrenner refuses to let Derek Jeter have the last word on this ... I'm not sure what to call it ... thing between them. Monday, DJ made a few bland comments, saying the media frenzy is "not going to stop until I stop it."

Think again: Yesterday, the Boss told the N.Y. Times: "I am the way I am. I got my message through. If I'm paying a guy $16 million, I want him to listen." Got that Derek? Now, if you're really smart, you'll get the hint and zip it.

Trade proposal: If the Boss is so unhappy with Jeter, I'm pretty sure the Red Sox would be up for a swap for Nomar, who hates the Boston media and will be a free agent next year.

Fan Behavior
The first "Sportsmanship and Fan Behavior Summit" kicks off today, basically an attempt by college officials to figure out what to do about postgame celebrations. (In other words, the conference is subtitled: "Sidestepping Legal Liability.")

Blame Game: Apparently, "rushing the field/court" has lost its meaning, because students do it for any reason now, from

beating a ranked rival to celebrating the halftime tumblers sticking that finale. I'm no sociologist, but I'm betting that the "experts" dump the blame on defenseless alcohol. Remember: Kegs don't swarm courts, kids do.

Trade proposal: Overheard in the line for coffee -- "I'll swap you three spare goalposts and a Title IX controversy for 25 frat guys, the marching-band drum major and a homecoming tailgate party."

Reality Recap
"Bachelorette": Ryan? RYAN?! With the awful poetry and a PhD from the Moses Malone School of Articulation? Trista's pick was the upset of the week. But rumor has it the relationship is already on the rocks. There's a shocker.

Trade proposal: We like what runner-up Charlie's impending free agency can do for the Cavs' cap room next season. Him for Zydrunas Ilgauskas, straight up.

"American Idol": Loyal Quickie readers should not have been surprised at Vanessa and Rickey moving on to the finals last night, called in this space yesterday. Faith in American teens is restored for picking Rickey after the Julia debacle two weeks ago.

Trade proposal: Judge Randy Jackson and an '04 Idol finalist to be named later for "Are You Hot?" judge Lorenzo Lamas.

Brian Kontak:
Wants to play in U.S. Women's Open, but from his quotes, his motives are publicity, gender-spite or some combo of the two.
Crazies, Kobe, Trista
Vote at SportsNation

Today on ESPN.com
P2: Hoosiers II
IN: NBA rumors
CBB: Maryland-Duke reax

Tyson Watch: That tattoo makes him look like he wants to front for KISS. Meanwhile, can we get a dermatologist ringside? ...

The only tourney Tiger has played five times or more without winning (the Nissan Open) tees off in L.A. today. That drought is over ...

The Carolina Panthers used their "franchise" tag for the first time ever -- on the punter, Todd Sauerbrun. Look at how key the punter was for the Bucs. Wait a sec ...

Casually watching TV last night, I actually caught a Xenadrine ad, pushing the ephedrine-based pills. Shameless ...

NOW Mickelson fires back? Insists that his equipment IS better ...

Newest reality TV show on horizon: "Love for Sale" -- real-life "Indecent Proposal." Gotta love it ...

The Quickie comes to play every day! ...

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