By David Schoenfield
Page 2

And on the eighth day there was a little bit of football heaven.

Louisville 56, Memphis 49. Over 1,200 total yards of offense. Thirty-seven points in one quarter.

That's more than you get in most NBA games these days.

As Kirk Herbstreit said, "It's backyard football."

Lots of points. Comfy couch. Great salsa. A bunch of white-clad Elvises in the stands. This game was so good that Mrs. Couch Potato even joined me for a couple quarters.

When Louisville's Eric Shelton plowed in for his fourth TD of the night with 37 seconds left, I figured that left just enough time for Memphis quarterback Danny Wimprine to conduct a game-tying scoring drive. The game would go into overtime. I would have to break out a second jar of salsa. The game might never end. Fowler, Corso and Herbstreit would have to do "College Gameday" on Saturday from a Memphis rib joint.

Thursday Scorecard
Food consumed: One large chocolate chip cookie. Chips.

Diet sodas: 2

Salsa: Desert Pepper Trading Company, Corn Black Bean Roasted Red Pepper Salsa. So good it could be a meal by itself. Our first four-star salsa!

Time spent raking or blowing leaves before game: Zero minutes

Mental state of mind: Rejuvenated after this game. Three games over the weekend, but only one column to write for Monday.

Weight gain: Holding steady at two pounds. Should have stuck to raking leaves instead of pulling out the leaf-blower. Laziness won't crack it in football. It's back to the rake this weekend. Especially after those two chocolate chip cookies.

Commercial I can't stand: "Seed of Chucky." Really, this is the best Hollywood can do?

It didn't happen that way. Wimprine threw an interception and the game merely ended in regulation. Maybe that's a good thing: I sure don't need any more chips.

Watching 19 games of football in 19 days sounds like a lot of fun, especially when you're getting paid. But think about it this way: It means dedicating at least 60 hours to watching a lot of teams you don't care about it. That's a lot of hours and a lot of bad football games.

I didn't know much about Louisville or Memphis, other than that the Cardinals nearly upset Miami a few weeks ago and their coach, Bobby Petrino, is being rumored as a guy who could replace Ron Zook at Florida. (I also knew that Petrino graduated from Carroll College in Helena, Montana, which happens to be the same school I went to. And you thought it took an Ivy league education -- or at least one of those fancy East Coast liberal arts schools like Williams -- to work at a place like ESPN and be a big-time couch potato.)

It didn't matter. I was riveted to the TV set. Hey, football purists may cringe at the lack of defense on this night, but this game was fun. Quarterbacks Wimprine and Stefan LeFors were terrific, Memphis running back DeAngelo Williams showed his stuff and there was big play after big play.

True, the defense wasn't great. But that did lead to the best exchange of the night, near halftime with the score 35-33, when Herbstreit said, "With all this man coverage not working, maybe you want to play some zone coverage."

Lee Corso: "I can really help these guys! It'd be 34-32 if they took my advice."

Chris Fowler: "Just wait until the defensive backs get more fatigued in the second half."

The scoring did slow down, but only because long drives ate up the clock. And to be honest, I even quit jotting notes down; I just wanted to watch the game.

I just wanted to be a couch potato, not The Couch Potato.

Final game rating: Five potatoes

E-mails of the Day
I think it's time for you to do an experiment. Eat nothing but meat, ie: burgers, dogs, ribs, wings, roast beef, roast pig. So you can experience the meat sweats. Full details of stomach groans and bathrooms visits included. Report results to Brian Murphy for the Hangover.

-- Christian Bruzzese

Mrs. Couch Potato might not appreciate the meat sweats. But it's a good suggestion and I'm here to serve my readers. Maybe I can try it for a few days and see how it works.

  • Football In America Index
  • Forde: Day 8: Offensive orgy
  • Postcard
  • Schoenfield: Livin' La Vida Sofa
  • Forde: Why we love football
  • I admire your tenacity when it comes to the 19 Days of Football. I've been watching them sporadically, when they don't interfere with late-evening lectures, and I have to say that it's difficult. The NFL is one thing, but I have a heck of a time following college teams that aren't my team and don't have any direct bearing on my team. The fact that you can keep interest in them (or pretend to keep interest in them) is admirable. Sort of.

    But hey, I have to admit that I'm disappointed at the shoddy coverage you gave the Michigan/Michigan State game. Was that not a history-book style game played in a history-book style rivalry? Was that not a game played in front of the largest crowd in football? Did that crowd not deserve a more than passing nod for sitting there (standing, in the student section) in the cold and the dark? Did we not deserve at least one Braylon Edwards, Chad Henne, or Michael Hart reference?

    Honestly. Keep up the good work, though. I look forward to seeing what you made of the Louisville/Memphis game.

    -- Boston Fan in Michigan

    That was an absolutely amazing game. It wasn't an official "19 Days of Football" game, but I did watch it -- Mrs. Couch Potato happens to be a big Michigan fan for reasons that defy explanation. I think she had a crush on Tom Brady or something. Anyway, here's a tip of her Wolverine head helmet to the great fans at Michigan for standing in the dark and cold.

    David Schoenfield is an editor for Page 2 in his day job. He can be reached at