By Dan Shanoff
Page 2 columnist

Trendiness is a harsh mistress. One week you're the hot pick to represent the West in the NBA Finals; the next you are building a summer house with your bricks. One week you are Figo, leader of the fashionable Portugal team picked to contend in the World Cup; the next, you are being chanted off the field with the inaccurate "Adios, amigos!" by ecstatic -- yet linguistically challenged -- U.S. fans. (Actually, in Portuguese, the properly pronounced trash talk is "Adeus, amigos.")

Meanwhile, set your alarms for 2:30 a.m. Monday to hop the bandwagon of the hottest Cinderella on the planet, literally: The U.S. men's soccer squad. We yawn because we love.

So now that you've got the scoop on one thing that's totally hip, take a look at the rest of what's hot and what's not this week. Feel free to share with your co-workers, buddies and significant others - they will really appreciate you for it:

What's Hot, What's Not this week
Category Hot Not
Irish Keane

Guys' definition of "Ya-Ya" Hot new one-name soccer star? Movie to check out with buddies
Clint Mathis' mohawk

Hedo Turkoglu's
"Coiffure de Turnover"
"Outing" controversy NBA draft status ("in or out?") Pharmaceutical preference
NBA draft hype Freddie Jones Juan Dixon
Hoops Hall of Famer Harlem Globetrotters Larry Brown
NHL hiring theory Can't beat 'em, hire 'em (Trottier to Rangers) Caps call Trottier; Trottier doesn't return call
Minnesota scoring machine

Ralph Nader Sticking his nose in the NBA, ruining it Sticking his nose in the political process, ruining it
Pedro Martinez's sweet spot Innings 2-9 The first (yikes)
Pernell "Sweet 'Key'" Whitaker Anything from "Iron Mute" Tyson
Fans for visiting teams in South Korea
"Citizen Support Squads"
for random teams

Celebrity-interview tactic Take them to a baseball game Smack competitor with non-microphone hand
Rookie third-baseman
Eric Hinske

Sean Burroughs
Coaching prospect Major Applewhite Oh, the UAB staff ...
Interest in France Soccer vs. Uruguay The French Open
"The Linc" "Nicknames are disrespectful to the memory of Abe Lincoln." (As opposed to using his name for your for-profit company? Save it.)
Lady Byng finalist rep Clutch goal-scorer Wuss
Britney Spears vehicle NASCAR speed racer "Crossroads" jalopy

A very special What's Hot, What's Not List supplement
The NBA Finals -- "Love It Live ... at least it's on during p.m. hours"

What's Hot, What's Not at the NBA Finals
Category Hot Not
New York pastime Root for the Nets as if you have all your life Ignoring "that team from New Jersey"
teammates fashion
Jerseys of historically great players Too-cool-for-school sunglasses
Retro Nets player to like Buck Williams Micheal Ray Richardson
Benchwarming cheerleader Donny Marshall Mark Madsen
Breakout performer Jason Collins Samaki Walker
Retro jersey
ABA Nets

Minneapolis Lakers
Nostalgia footage Byron Scott
winning Lakers titles
Nets led by
Coleman and Anderson
Under the microscope Nets' depth in paint Referee calls
Designated Kobe-stopper Richard Jefferson Doug Christie

Dan Shanoff is a columnist for Page 2. His "What's Hot, What's Not" trend-spotting list appears Thursdays. Got inside scoop on an up-and-coming trend? Want to declare something passé? Send this glimpse of your hipness to