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Tuesday, June 3, 2014
Buzz That Was: Variety Show

By D'Arcy Maine
espnW.com

Harriette Thompson and Meb Keflezighi
Two great marathon ambassadors, Harriette Thompson and Meb Keflezighi, pose before the Suja Rock 'n' Roll San Diego Marathon on Sunday.

In case you were too busy trying to find a way to attach your infant to your wedding dress and missed out on sports, we've got you covered. Here's what everyone else was talking about last night.

91 years, 26.2 miles, no problem!

AMAZING HUMAN ALERT! On Sunday, 91-year old Harriette Thompson completed the San Diego Rock 'n' Roll Marathon with a world record-setting time for her age group of 7 hours 7 minutes 42 seconds. You now officially have no excuse to skip the gym today, unless you're 92 or older.

Thompson, a cancer survivor who is reportedly recovering from radiation treatment for squamous cell carcinoma, ran her first marathon at the age of 76 and has since participated in the San Diego event 15 times. She has raised more than $90,000 for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society in the process.

Don't expect Thompson's record to stand for long, though. Thompson told reporters after the race she hopes to improve on her time next year "if I'm still here." She went on to say that she'll try and do better next year and be in better shape. If that story doesn't motivate you in every possible way, you might want to check to make sure you have a pulse.

Love and basketball

On Monday's episode of "The Bachelorette," the remaining suitors were excited for a chance to show off their basketball skills and took to the court at Mohegan Sun Arena. Until, that is, they realized they would be playing against some of the WNBA's brightest stars. "Bachelorette" Andi Dorfman teamed up with Swin Cash, Tamika Catchings, Elena Delle Donne, Lindsey Harding and Nneka Ogwumike to take on the male contestants in a pickup game.

This pic is basically a PSA to eat your veggies growing up. I should have listened. #shortie #TheBachelorette #WNBA pic.twitter.com/VR0wDvhFrY

- Andi Dorfman (@AndiDorfman) June 2, 2014

Needless to say, the men got more than they bargained for. One of the contestants perhaps summed it up best while trying to catch his breath: "These girls are smoking us. We are running around like a bunch of infants and they are barely trying."

On behalf of women everywhere, thanks, ladies, for proving to everyone what we already knew.

Fan fraud

Japanese soccer team Omiya Ardija has been struggling to fill seats this season. But instead of just accepting the poor turnout, the team decided to take matters into their own hands. Free tickets to the local community, you ask? Nope. The team placed cardboard cutouts -- donning team apparel, NATCH -- in the seats. A move that has apparently fooled absolutely no one.

Omiya Ardija supporters filling seats on their long, midweek away day. With cardboard cutouts! Via @3freccecarp pic.twitter.com/HfRKsnLUvd

- Barry Valder (@spulseukultras) May 28, 2014

I think we've just discovered the Jacksonville Jaguars' latest plan to increase attendance numbers.

Hungry Mets

In rare good news for New York Mets fans, the team won something this season! Not only that, but they shattered a record in the process! I know, I know, try to contain your excitement, guys. However, the victory isn't exactly baseball-related, although it did take place at a ballpark. According to the Star-Ledger, the Mets used a rain delay at Citizens Bank Park in Philadelphia in April as their time to break the team record for most cheesesteaks eaten in one day.

And break it they did. The Mets wolfed down 103 of the beef-and-cheese subs. The accomplishment reportedly occurred over a 10-hour span and is drawing comparisons to some of the great feats in sports history.

In Philadelphia, the Mets are the 1961 Yankees of eating cheesesteaks. On records sets and broken. http://t.co/OCt3QHJxsL

- Mike Vorkunov (@Mike_Vorkunov) June 2, 2014

To recap: The Mets ate more cheesesteaks in one day than they will have wins this season. Congrats?

Water rescue

Minnesota Vikings linebacker Chad Greenway saved the lives of two boaters on Lake Minnetonka on Monday. No big deal, or anything. As Crystal and Edward Alexis struggled to steer their boat and began heading for a dam, Greenway sprang into action, ran into the frigid water and helped bring the boat to safety.

Right now...Chad Greenway from the @Vikings is helping rescue two people stuck on Minnetonka. #hero pic.twitter.com/REAsEcAg6A

- Rena Sarigianopoulos (@RenaKARE11) June 2, 2014

Greenway continued to prove his Good Samaritan status and later drove the couple to their car and helped them get their boat out of the water.

Take that, Heat

Looks like a few San Antonio Spurs fans took some trolling advice from Lance Stephenson, as evidenced by a trash-talking billboard spotted on Monday in the San Antonio area.

This is what The Spurs vs The Heat is about. pic.twitter.com/snejaLwKb9

- Texas Humor (@TexasHumor) June 2, 2014

It is now completely acceptable to drop the mike, Spurs fans.

A birthday hug from Rafa

Today might be Rafael Nadal's 28th birthday, but it looks like Andy Murray's mom, Judy, somehow received the best present of the day at Roland Garros.

Today I wished a very special young man a happy 28th birthday. And got a very special hug. Jealous anyone? :-) #Rafa

- judy murray (@judmoo) June 3, 2014

A true hero, that Judy.

See something worthy of inclusion on social media or just want to comment on one of today's stories? Send it my way on Twitter, @darcymaine_espn.