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Tuesday, July 2, 2002
Updated: July 3, 12:08 PM ET
Take your cuts

By Dan Shanoff
Page 2 columnist

Full props to baseball maven Jayson Stark for suggesting that MLB flip-flop the "30th man" fan All-Star voting to vote someone off the team -- "Survivor"-style. But loyal Page 2 readers know that a true test of a sports gimmick is its applicability to the nonsports world. We tried it with baseball contraction; so we head back into "real life" to see how we can incorporate the 30th man voting theory.

Remember, the idea is that you have one list of people who already make the cut, then a short list of people who just missed out -- the point is to allow fans to decide the single name out of the short-list pool to join the anointed others. Democracy in action!

Who makes the cut?
Team Made the cut Up for fan voting Page 2 endorses
The Jackson 5
Michael, Jermaine, Marlon, Randy

Tito, Bobby, Phil, Samuel L., "Miss" (from the Outkast song)

Sam L. -- he's the 2002 ESPY host, baby! Tito didn't add much value anyway.
Cast of "Diff'rent Strokes" Arnold, Willis, Mr. Drummond, Kimberly Mrs. Garrett, Adelaide, Pearl, Maggie McKinney, Sam McKinney, Allan Houston Pearl, because she had experience working in the White House. Sam (Danny Cooksey) deserved to meet the Gooch in a dark alley.
TV talk-show hosts
Winfrey, Letterman, Leno, Lake

Ananda Lewis, Jenny Jones, Montel Williams, Charles Barkley

Subpar draft night aside, does anyone deserve his own show more than the Round Mound?
*NSync Justin Timberlake, JC Chasez, Joey Fatone Chris Kirkpatrick, Lance Bass, Li'l Bow Wow, Andy Roddick, Nikoloz Tskitishvili If the boyish looking Skita can dance, he can ably sub for Bass. Dunk on him, too.
"Real World" locations New York, San Francisco, Miami, Hawaii, London Gainesville, College Station, Columbus, Tempe, South Bend "Tonight on 'Real World': Puck and Tyrone Willingham get into a fight over who gets to ride the bike around campus."
Rachel, Phoebe, Chandler

Ross, Monica, Joey, Jeff Kent, Barry Bonds, Roger Clemens, Mike Piazza

Jeff and Barry living in Monica's apartment would make for high comedy.
Women who kick butt The Williams Sisters, Jennifer "Alias" Garner, Sarah Hughes, Lisa Leslie Sara Fisher, Tiffeny Milbrett, Annika Sorenstam, Daniela Hantuchova, Jackie Stiles, Julia Stiles Daniela Hantuchova, by a nudge over Julia Stiles. Think Kournikova with tennis talent. Throw her in a car on a road trip with Fisher. "Mailbox tennis," anyone?
"The Brady Bunch" Mike, Carol, Greg, Marcia, Bobby Peter, Jan, Cindy, Alice, Tom Cindy's a tattletale, Jan has self-image issues, Peter's kind of a wuss, Tom is overexposed ... and Alice makes a mean roast. She's the pick.
The ACC Duke, Maryland, Florida State, Virginia Clemson, North Carolina, Wake Forest, N.C. State, South Carolina, Elon, Florida A&M, Delaware, DeVry, Hollins I mean, have you ever been to the Hotties -- uh, Hollins -- campus? Worth the trip -- and inclusion. Yes, UNC, one bad hoops season taints three decades of dominance.
Cast of "Scooby-Doo"
Fred, Daphne, Scooby

Velma, Shaggy, Scrappy-Doo, Tim Conway (frequent cartoon cameos), The Harlem Globetrotters (ditto), Sepp Blatter

Though slightly dowdy, Velma brings far more IQ than, say, Blatter.
Brat Pack Sheen, Estevez, Lowe, Ringwald, Moore Sheedy, Hall, Nelson, Freddie Prinze Jr., the guys from "American Pie," Jennifer Love Hewitt We would have liked to see JLH in "St. Elmo's Fire."
"The West Wing" Pres. Bartlett, C.J., Toby, Donna, Leo Charlie, Sam, Josh, Josh's girlfriend, Mrs. Bartlett, Doug Collins, Juan Dixon With the likeable Dixon maintaining a D.C.-area residence, isn't there a way we can get him a cameo role as a lobbyist?
Best sports towns New York, Chicago, Boston, Cleveland, Sacramento, Albuquerque Philadelphia, anywhere else in California, Denver, Charlotte (uh, maybe not Charlotte), Orlando, Seattle If we don't say Philly, will we get beat up on our next trip through town?
Sports commissioners David Stern, Paul Tagliabue, Gary Bettman Bud Selig, Bob Costas, Ted Koppel, Bono Hey, if Bud likes this fan-voting idea so much, let's give him a chance to experience it.

Dan Shanoff is a columnist for Page 2. His "What's Hot, What's Not" trend-spotting guide appears on Thursdays. He is consistently voted just short of any all-star list..