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Friday, October 30, 2009
Updated: November 6, 1:54 AM ET
Wylde, Shepherd face off for first

By Jim Wilkie

Week 8 brings us another showdown for first place in the Alice in Chains & Friends Charity Fantasy Football League as Kenny Wayne Shepherd faces Zakk Wylde.

The guitar wizards face off in the fantasy football equivalent of "Crossroads," and their roster choices combined with a little luck will determine which one performs like Ralph Macchio and which one is Steve Vai.

The two 6-1 teams have had little trouble this season, with Shepherd's KWS Domination leading the league in scoring (759 points), while Zakk Wylde Doom Crew Inc. has had the benefit of great timing with a league-low 481 points against.

Have a look at what Wylde and others said this past week on the league message board:

Zakk Wylde Doom Crew Inc.
No subject
Posted: Oct 23, 1:00 PM
To the Alice in Chains Charity Affiliates … What are you gonna do when the Doom Crew runs over you?
To KWS … And that Bullseye has its sights set on you!!!!
Hugs & Kisses, Zakk.

Father Magnolia, the legendary Madden Trophy established in Dublin, Ireland 1990 is now residing in the Doom Crew Gym and I am feeding off its power.
P.S. we had to put duct tape over my only tainted loss in seven appearances in Madden Bowl V the fact that you are so handsome is the only reason I got over the loss and only had five years of therapy.

Father Vincenzo, you are looking very similar to your beloved Dallas Cowgirls!!!!! Have you recovered from the pounding of the Doom Crew?
Hugs and Kisses, ZW

Father Cantrell, word on the street is there has been bitter rumblings from one of our affiliates from the AIC Charity League. It seems that our two-headed beast is getting the best of one of our affiliates and doesn't feel too swell about it. This isn't confirmed. It's only rumors as you know what a gossip mill this AIC Charity League really is.

Father Ian, the Doom Crew Inc. is going to [hurt] you just like Anthrax! And if you haven't heard any of their records, let me say this about that: "It ain't gonna be pretty!!!" Let's go, Yankees!

Father Aronoff, thank God your timing as a musician destroys your timing in this league.

Father Duff, relish your moment in defeating the almighty Doom Crew Inc. The Almighty Doom Crew will never taste defeat again, especially from the hands of some legendary iconic rock star musician guy.
I love you. ZW

As Week 7 approaches, the AIC Charity Football League you might as well all quit because no one likes any of you, including your parents, fans, accountants, record companies, movie studios, merch companies, third grade teachers, tour bus companies, all airlines, Carnival Cruise Lines, lighting companies, your neighbors, toll collectors, all.

Scott Ian Mean Machine
Re: No subject
Posted: Oct 24, 1:42 PM
I'm sorry, Zachariah … did you say something to me? You seem to be a little preoccupied making posts and losing games these days. Need some help from the fantasy virgin? You know how to get ahold of me … anyway, until then Mean Machine makes it four in a row this week and continues the table-running performance.

JC Aroma of Tacoma
Can't catch a break
Posted: Oct 27, 3:40 PM
I think that this season is the weirdest one so far since I've been playing fantasy football. I'm 3-4 in both leagues, injury riddled, and just cant catch a break. seriously … Holmes gets a touchdown taken away by a phantom penalty, then a miracle … Westbrook goes out with an injury to stop Phil's ….I mean Zakk's team cold, and I can't get 18 points out of McNabb and Portis combined. Oh, well , bummer dude. Congrats on the win, Phil. You are playing Zakk's team right into the playoffs

Scott Ian Mean Machine
Dear Brent Celek and Ahmad Bradshaw
Posted: Oct 26, 11:39 PM
Thank you for your contributions to my team this week. I will be sending the both of you a heaping pile of dog s--- wrapped in Matthew Berry's weekly tip sheet … COD.

Team McKagan D
Re: Dear Brent Celek and Ahmad Bradshaw
Posted: Oct 27, 8:22 PM
Yeah, guys, thanks for helpin my team out!

Scott Ian Mean Machine
Re: Dear Brent Celek and Ahmad Bradshaw
Posted: Oct 28, 8:17 PM
Oh don't worry … you are gettin' an extra special bag. : )

Each participant in the Alice in Chains & Friends Charity Fantasy Football League will put up one valuable item for auction by the end of the season. The league champion will designate which charity receives the auction's proceeds. More details on the auction will be announced in the coming weeks.

Weekly updates on the Alice in Chains & Friends Charity Fantasy Football League, trash talk and interviews with the owners will be published on's The Life section throughout the season. Members of the league also will drop by SportsNation for occasional chats.

Here are the standings after Week 7, with a look ahead to this weekend's matchups (mouse over the photos for bios of the participants):