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Wednesday, December 16, 2009
Updated: January 4, 5:40 PM ET
Get out your clipboards, everybody!

Have you ever imagined being an NBA coach? The hair gel, the expensive suits, getting ignored by your players … it's quite a life!

Well, now you can be one. Almost. Those of you with an ESPN Insider account can enter a contest to design an inbounds play for the Washington Wizards. Really. They'll actually use it in a game.

You have until Dec. 23.

The best one wins. But you should know that I already submitted this play. And also this one.

So I think I have this contest locked up. What? You doubt DeShawn Stevenson would be willing to get down on all fours and bark like a dog or do a series of cartwheels? The guy has a Pittsburgh Pirates logo tattooed on his face. Backward. So he can see it in the mirror.

Nothing is too crazy for him. He's probably been begging to run my plays for years.