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Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Updated: September 20, 10:27 PM ET
Page 2's Backup Quarterback Rankings!

By Thomas Neumann
Page 2

Jimmy Clausen, Vince Young, Brady Quinn

After a laborious offseason followed by frantic player movement, we might be poised for one of the least predictable NFL seasons in recent memory.

• Can the Green Bay Packers repeat as Super Bowl champions?

• Will the New York Jets finally get over the hump and return to the Super Bowl for the first time in 43 years?

• Is the Indianapolis Colts' run of greatness -- nine consecutive trips to the playoffs -- about to end?

• Most importantly, who is the premier clipboard carrier in the National Football League?

Without further ado, we present this season's debut edition of Page 2's Backup Quarterback Rankings.


This season's backup quarterback rankings:
Sept. 14 | Sept. 21 | Sept. 28 | Oct. 5: punters | Oct. 12: long snappers | Oct. 19: referees


Last season's backup quarterback rankings:
Sept. 15 | Sept. 22 | Sept. 29 | Oct. 6 | BYE | Oct. 22 | Oct. 28 | Nov. 4 | INACTIVE | Nov. 18

1. Vince Young

Team
Upside
Downside
Intangibles
Tangibles
"It" factor
Buzz
8
-2
10
10
25

Vince Young

Young called the Eagles a "Dream Team." Let's take the analogy a step further. Quarterback equates to point guard. So Michael Vick is analogous to Magic Johnson as the starter, and Young correlates to John Stockton. Please, Vince, don't ever wear these.


2. Jimmy Clausen

Team
Upside
Downside
Intangibles
Tangibles
"It" factor
Buzz
9
-2
8
8
23

Jimmy Clausen

No quarterback cemented his bench status this week more than Clausen. In fact, Clausen slipped to the No. 3 spot in Carolina, with Derek Anderson now serving as Cam Newton's primary caddie. So Clausen now has plenty of time to polish his rings.


3. Curtis Painter

Team
Upside
Downside
Intangibles
Tangibles
"It" factor
Buzz
6
-1
8
8
21

Curtis Painter

How valuable is Painter as a clipboard carrier? So valuable that the Colts signed 38-year-old Kerry Collins off the street to fill in for the injured Peyton Manning, rather than pry the clipboard away from Painter. That, football fans, is true confidence.


4. Brady Quinn

Team
Upside
Downside
Intangibles
Tangibles
"It" factor
Buzz
9
-4
7
8
20

Brady Quinn

Quinn already has accomplished a Herculean feat in leapfrogging Tim Tebow for the No. 2 spot in Denver. Any other achievements Quinn enjoys this season would surely pale in comparison. Then again, nothing comes close to hanging out with Bret Michaels.


5. Tim Tebow

Team
Upside
Downside
Intangibles
Tangibles
"It" factor
Buzz
9
-2
3:16
9
19

Tim Tebow

It's clear many Broncos supporters want to see Tebow under center, as evidenced by fans' chants during Monday's loss to Oakland. Judging by last season's rookie hairstyle, we hope the chants will be of the Gregorian variety moving forward.


6. Garrett Gilbert

Team
Upside
Downside
Intangibles
Tangibles
"It" factor
Buzz
6
-3
7
7
17

Garrett Gilbert

The former national prep player of the year tumbled from starter to third string this week, reigniting an ongoing controversy. Still, we think Gilbert will rebound in a big way -- by winning 2012 ACC Offensive Player of the Year honors. You read it here first.


7. Gale Gilbert

Team
Upside
Downside
Intangibles
Tangibles
"It" factor
Buzz
7
-3
5
7
16

Gale Gilbert

Gilbert slides in one spot below his son. He's the only player ever to appear on five consecutive Super Bowl rosters, and he was the QB when Cal beat Stanford and John Elway on The Play. See No. 14 walking onto the field at the 15-second mark here? It's Gale!


8. Caleb Hanie

Team
Upside
Downside
Intangibles
Tangibles
"It" factor
Buzz
6
-4
7
5
14

Caleb Hanie

Hanie provided a spark for the Bears after Jay Cutler was injured in last season's NFC Championship Game. Just as important is the fact that Hanie has been happily married for more than five years, which significantly minimizes the chances of this kind of drama.


9. Mike Kafka

Team
Upside
Downside
Intangibles
Tangibles
"It" factor
Buzz
4
-4
4
8
12

Mike Kafka

Playing behind Vick and Young, Kafka has the luxury of being able to nurture his skills. We think Kafka will ultimately achieve great things. After all, his Wikipedia entry is longer than that of Millard Fillmore -- who's only the 13th president of the United States.


Emergency QB: Shane Lechler

Team
Upside
Downside
Intangibles
Tangibles
"It" factor
Buzz
2
-9
7
3
3

Shane Lechler

This is not a mug shot of John Daly after a particularly rough night at Hooters. Nope, it's our emergency quarterback! Lechler, who has never thrown a pass in the NFL, is No. 3 on the Raiders' QB hierarchy until Terrelle Pryor completes a five-game suspension.


Thomas Neumann is an editor for Page 2.


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