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Friday, September 23, 2011
Bush league? No, just fantasy scoring

By Jim Wilkie

After two weeks in the Alice in Chains & Friends Fantasy Football Charity League, just three teams remain undefeated.

George W. Bush
This little guy in former President George Bush's hands shows how Jay Ferguson felt after last week's games.

Chris DeGarmo's Mach Six's, Mike Inez's Your Real Dad Al Davis and Vinnie Paul's The Brickwall Paul put their 2-0 records on the line in Week 3 of the charity league. Paul's ascension prompted this comment on the message board from his next opponent, league founder Jerry Cantrell of Alice in Chains:

Hole In The Wall Gang
Sept. 23, 2:20 a.m.
Jerry Cantrell
Aroma Of Tacoma

I think I may have spotted a way through the Brickwall … just sayin'

Fantasy scores can be unpredictable and change when you don't expect them. Like anyone gambling on a USC-Utah college football game, sometimes you have to wait a day until the results are official. Cantrell's Aroma Of Tacoma was on the positive side of this while actor Jay Ferguson's Dallas' Best wasn't so lucky.

Feeling like a W
Sept. 19, 8:39 p.m.
Jerry Cantrell
Aroma Of Tacoma

I feel like George Bush stealing an election. Last night the scoreboard read 103-102 with the Aroma losing to Jay Ferguson's squad. But when I wok up today to check the results, things looked a little different … the Point Fairy giveth and the Point Fairy taketh away. Jay must be crying like a baby. I'll take a win any way I can get it … just like Old W.

Re: Feeling like a W
Posted: Sept. 21, 2:30 p.m.
Jay Ferguson
Dallas' Best

Funny, I had a similar experience … (expletive) Chris Johnson, (expletive) Deion Point Fairy, (expletive) George Bush … unbelievable.

Cheer up, Ferguson. At least you're not in last place overall.

Sept. 20, 3:03 p.m.
Duff McKagan
Team McKagan

Not only have I not won a game yet, but my "team" has gotten spanked fairly handily. It seems that I shall have to put my overall and general good attitude toward life into overdrive.

My fantasy team sucks. Seahawks? Haven't won a game either. Mariners? Aw, c'mon! Huskies? Teetering. Sonics? Oh yeah, they are in Oklahoma … Let's go, Storm?
-- Duff

Re: Oh-Fer!
Sept. 20, 11:54 p.m.
Jerry Cantrell
Aroma Of Tacoma

I was almost with ya, buddy. Jeb Bush bailed me out and changed the score … a day later.

Re: Oh-Fer!
Sept. 21, 11:14 p.m.
Duff McKagan
Team McKagan

I saw that. By the hair of your chinny-chin-chin! But hey, pal … a win is a win.

Re: Oh-Fer!
Sept. 22, 12:16 p.m.
Sean Kinney
Team Nosering

Your streak may be coming to an end, as I see that the nerds who study this stuff are giving you more red check marks than me. I may not know what I'm doing in this fantasy world, and I may still be dusting myself off from the Brickwall that fell on me last weekend, but I'm putting all of my faith in newly acquired Dexter McCluster, who may just fool everyone and carry me to victory. Either that or I'll lose and go back to playing video games …

Each participant will put one valuable item up for auction by the end of the season. The league champion will get to designate which charity receives the net proceeds of the auction. More details on the auction will be announced in the coming weeks.

Weekly updates on the Alice in Chains & Friends Fantasy Football Charity League, trash talk and interviews with the owners will be published in's The Life and Music sections throughout the season. Members of the league also will drop by for occasional chats on SportsNation.

Here is a look at Week 3's matchups and last week's results: