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You know what they warn about the lottery: You have a better chance of being struck by lightning than hitting the jackpot.
Lately, the Miami Dolphins' luck has been on par with having a $100 million lottery ticket getting burnt extra-crispy by a bolt of lightning.
They lost out on the Peyton Manning Sweepstakes. They let the Matt Flynn Powerball Ticket get cashed in Seattle. Now they've been reduced to wishing for an Alex Smith Scratch-Off Ticket or a David Garrard Plinko Chip.
Miami, it's when desperate people have nothing left that they're most vulnerable to being picked clean by scammers.
So as you're checking your email inbox, be on guard for hoaxes promising the next Bob Griese (we'd have said "the next Dan Marino," but we assume you want a QB who can win Super Bowls).
Here's hoping the message line "WE GUARANTEEEEEEE QB VICTORY!!!!" at least gets flagged by your spam filter before you open the email and find this:
"Hello! I am talented scout in Canadian Football League! I represent can't-miss QB, who, due to expiring visa cannot play in Canadia. But if you send big $$$ now, you can aquire rights to 6-7, 330-pound QB who can run 40-meter dash in 4.25467 secunds. Highly accuracy! Has every intangibles! Don't miss can't-miss stud! Has memorized all silent audibles! You'll win World Series Bowl, I promise, or all your $$$ back"
Oh, geez, you didn't fall for that and wire the signing bonuses to a bogus email addresses already, did you? That cash is gone forever, just like your Brandon Marshall paychecks.
Well, we'd wish you good luck as you start back at square one, but we're afraid of getting hit by lightning that was aimed at you but missed and hit us.