When EA Sports producers said that they were dropping the "Madden" ratings of certain players to implement a wider scale, thereby better separating the superstars from the players who might be working at Home Depot later this year, man, they weren't kidding.
So I decided to scan the rosters of every team and a list of available free agents to find the lowest-rated players by position to create the worst possible "Madden" team in history (at least according to "Madden NFL 10"). Here is the lineup:
Most embarrassing stat: 28 rating for Deep Throw Accuracy.
If your receiver is running a route longer than 20 yards, you might as well just hand the ball to a defender. Martin throws so much to the wrong team in "Madden," it's like he's color-blind.
Most embarrassing stat: 36 rating for Elusiveness.
When you're a running back and your elusiveness rating is two points worse than Matthias Askew's (Broncos DT) you have serious issues.
Most embarrassing stat: 19 rating for Throwing Power.
How does Williams get a 19 while someone like Brad Hoover gets a 35 for the same category? Was there a fullback throw-off I missed in the offseason?
Most embarrassing stat: 40 rating for Awareness.
With that kind of Awareness rating, I'm surprised he even remembers to bring his helmet to the game.
Most embarrassing stat: 12 rating for Hit Power.
Couldn't knock out Glass Joe. Also, same Hit rating as kicker Nick Novak (see below).
Most embarrassing stat: 21 rating for Stiff Arm.
The lowest Stiff Arm rating by far among tight ends. By comparison, Charlie Frye has a 22 Stiff Arm rating, and you know how many times you've seen him shove defenders to the ground while running to glory.
Most embarrassing stat: Bell's 68 rating for Pass Block Strength.
Might as well give him a red cape to wave as defensive players bull-rush their way for the sack.
Most embarrassing stat: Velasco's 10 rating for Tackle.
If there is an interception, Velasco has a better chance of tripping in front of the defender to knock him down than actually getting his hands on the ball carrier.
Most embarrassing stat: 25 rating for Jump.
Don't ever ask him to join your Double Dutch team.