The One E-mail That Wasn't Insulting

I nearly pull a hammy trying to find funny closed-captioning screw-ups. Then, as soon as the column runs, you people deluge me with them. Thanks for nothing.

I am a Closed Captioner. I was doing an L.A. station a couple of years ago when a local reporter was doing a story on budget cuts for the Meals On Wheels program. The reporter was interviewing an elderly man, who said, "I don't know how I'm going to get my males anymore. I only get one hot male a week, and now that's gone. I don't know what I'm going to do now for a hot male."

-- Sebrina Crosby (Ashville, Ala.)

Best closed captioning I ever saw was during a football game in the '90s: LOOKS LIKE THIS GAME IS HEADED TO OPRAH TIME.

-- James F. (Redmond, Wash.)

Rick, my favorite CC to date was reading about the Pittsburgh PIE RATS.

-- Clint Thomas (Charleston, W. Va.)


-- Beverly O'Keeffe (Cranford N.J.)

I've got another one -- "just incredible" was transcribed as "Justin Credible." Good name for a superhero!

-- Brad Smith (Toronto)

My wife of 23 years is deaf and I have always watched television using closed captions and have enjoyed the carnival of text. Best one ever was when watching a football game and the announcers were describing a misdirection play -- except it was referred to as a MISSED ERECTION play.

-- Bill Littlefield (San Diego)

Watching an old Rams' game in an airport bar one Monday night. Kurt Warner's pass was complete to Ice Sack Bruise. Nice catch, Isaac Bruce.

-- Terry K (St. Paul)

Not sports-related, but I once saw a caption identify a home-building charity as "Habitat for Humidity".

-- Jim Savage (Richmond)

Your article on Clothes Cap Shunning was absolutely in spiraling.

-- Kurt Ramler (Northfield, Minn.)

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