Buzz That Was: Prepare For Chaos
In case you've been too busy watching a middle school rock band recital gone wrong and missed out on sports, we've got you covered. Here's what everyone else is talking about.
Can't take the Heat!
In good news for anyone who has spent the past four years perfecting your "I'm going to take my talents to" jokes, LeBron James has opted out of his deal with the Miami Heat and will become an unrestricted free agent on July 1. His agent informed the Heat of his decision (NO! NOT THE DECISION!) to exercise his early-termination option on Tuesday morning. Let the mayhem begin!
Not 1. Not 2. ...well just 2 and then I'll opt out. -LeBron- SportsNation (@SportsNation) June 24, 2014
So i guess all you Lebron fans are free agents too huh pic.twitter.com/61zwjjPNlV- IG: Just_D0ug (@iSpeaksTheTruth) June 24, 2014
LeBron's wife, Savannah, preemptively sounded the Twitter alarm and sparked widespread speculation on Sunday with an Instagram post of a picture of Akron, Ohio, and the caption "Home sweet home!! The countdown is real! #330." Tuesday's announcement will only add fuel to the "LEBRON IS RETURING TO CLEVELAND" fire, despite the fact the James family spends its summers in Akron every year because, you know, it's home.
LeBron reportedly is unsure of his next destination and could potentially return to Miami. Regardless, you may want to consider staying off of Twitter and potentially hiding in your basement for the next three weeks or so if baseless Internet rumors and incessant chatter aren't your thing. Godspeed, America.
Throwing Andy Murray a bone
Andy Murray: reigning Wimbledon champion, Officer of the Most Excellent Order of the British Empire, dog hero. While driving to practice at the All England Club, the tennis star saw an adorable dog run out into the middle of the street. Taking his OBE title seriously, Murray jumped out of his car to stop traffic and save the pup. He called the number listed on the dog's tag and returned him to his proper owner. Andy Murray, to the rescue!
The saved pup has yet to capitalize on its newfound fame and is shockingly still without a Twitter account. For the record, Murray's own dog, Maggie May, has more than 27,000 followers.
A rush of blood
After his straight-sets win over Jurgen Zopp of Estonia in his opening match at Wimbledon, Latvia's Ernests Gulbis was answering the usual questions from reporters when he misheard a question about "umpires" as a question about "vampires." You know, just the usual news conference fodder. Somehow, the No. 12 seed wasn't fazed by the inquiry about blood-sucking creatures and answered it seriously. After speaking for more than 30 seconds about how he is very much against vampires (natch), Gulbis realized his gaffe and changed his response accordingly. "Umpires? I thought something else. I thought vampires in the way the people who are surrounding and sucking the energy out of players. That's what I meant."
At least we now know where Gulbis stands on umpires AND vampires.
Chelsea Baker whiffs Rays
On Monday, members of the Tampa Bay Rays struggled against a new pitcher during batting practice. Who was the new ace? Meet 17-year-old Chelsea Baker, a high school baseball phenom with a knuckleball that would make R.A. Dickey proud.
Insert obligatory "but anyone could strike out the Rays right now!" joke here. Baker went on to wow the crowd with the ceremonial first pitch before the Rays lost to the Pittsburgh Pirates 8-1.
While just about every celebrity ever who has been asked to do the first-pitch honors would kill -- or even appear in a film with Lindsay Lohan -- to be able to throw like that, Baker casually walked off the mound like a boss.
Spare some gas money for my Ferrari?
Ugh. Don't you just hate when your Ferrari runs out of gas on the highway? It's seriously SO embarrassing. Or at least it was for Evan Turner. The Indiana Pacers swingman had a tough time understanding the flashing gas can sign on his dashboard and was left stranded on the side of the highway with his girlfriend on Monday. Thankfully, his former Ohio State teammate P.J. Hill came to save the day with a can of gas ... and his smartphone to document the whole experience.
Guessing the public shame that comes from this will ensure Turner pays a little more attention to his gas tank in the future. It's not like he can't afford the gas, after all.
Chris Smalling not your cup of tea?
It's been a rough few days for England's soccer fans after their team was eliminated from the World Cup with losses to Italy and Uruguay. And while most fans want to forget about this whole tournament, the few devotees who were hoping to commemorate the 2014 squad with mugs featuring the likenesses of all the players got quite a surprise when they opened the set. The Chris Smalling cup featured a picture of someone who is decidedly not Chris Smalling and is, in fact, the President of the United States. Yup, somehow an unnamed British company mistook Barack Obama for the soccer star. OK then.
So that's ... bad. That's just really, really bad.
See something worthy of inclusion on social media or just want to comment on one of today's stories? Send it my way on Twitter, @darcymaine_espn.