The Duke Blue Devils don't need our sympathy. They recruit better players, they have a better coach, they have more obnoxious fans, they win more games -- truly, they wallow like pigs in a trough of pure privilege.

Still, when you consider the best NCAA runners-up since 1980, I want you to join me in patting the heads of the '99 Blue Devils. Those poor little guys actually deserve the love.

Off the top of my head (where I do all my thinking), I couldn't name you all five starters on any of the other "contenders" in the poll at right. Off the top of yours, I challenge you to name all five starters on that UConn team that hijacked the '99 title. Hamilton, El-Amin, Moore, er, goofy white center with bad hair, um ... bzzzzz. But that '99 Dook team -- that was an early-Mickey Mouse Club-caliber collection of talent. Go ahead. See for yourself. Rattle the names off. Brand. Avery. Maggette. Langdon. Carrawell. James. Battier. Burgess. Sick, isn't it?

The first four were first-round draft picks in 1999. The fifth was a first-rounder in 2000. The next two could be this year. The last one? Well, by last-one standards, he's not bad. For whatever sad-sacked reason, at least you've heard of him, right? Anyhow, all told, these guys put together the most impressive regular season since I can remember (rough beginnings of what I can remember: Chris Mullin in short-shorts. Owie.).

Here's how the Dookies sized up before UConn took them down: 36 wins, 1 loss (to Cincy by two); 18-0 in the ACC; 32-game winning streak; No. 1 in the polls for 21 weeks; Scored 91 per; Allowed 67 per; Shot 51.4% from the field (40% on threes); outrebounded opponents by nearly 10 per mauling. Oh, and the other thing: No annoying slap-the-floor, draw-BS-charge-after-BS-charge types in the bunch. Greg Newton? Wojo? Marty Clark? Brian Davis? Not on this team. Nope. These guys were almost ... cool.

Now, to take the knees out of our other contenders, because I will not be defied on this:

Michigan '93: Look, I am a Wolverine, and I lived and died by this team. Thing is, mostly (it seemed), I died. As mythical as the Fab Five are these days, they lost more crummy games to more crummy yahoos than any other team of great lore.

Duke '86: That was Danny Ferry's first year. Uh-huh. No props going to anything associated with him.

Houston '83: Yeah, that was a good team. Phi Slamma Jamma and all that. Still, what does it say that they lost to a 10-loss No. 6 seed? Take a number.

G-Town, '82: Nope. Look it up. These Hoyas had six regular-season losses.

Are we missing anybody?

'91 Runnin' Rebels: Great team. Fantastic team. One problem: They weren't the runners-up of anything. Got bounced in the semis ... by Dook.

'85 G-Town: I feel that ... as defending champs ... with Ewing as a senior ... I promise them further consideration ... Denied.

I think my premise stands. The 1999 Blue Devils: The ultimate losers. Shall we offer them one last consolation prize? All together now: Awwwww.

Scott Burton is a senior reporter for ESPN The Magazine. E-mail him at scott.burton@espnmag.com.