Wasted away again in Margaritaville

Weeks: Preseason | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13

The Bottom 10's inspirational thought of the week:

Pale invaders and tanned crusaders
Are worshipping the sun
On the corner of "walk" and "don't walk"
Somewhere on US 1

I'm back to livin' Floridays
Blue skies and ultra-violet rays
Lookin' for better days, lookin' for better days
Lookin' for Floridays

-- Jimmy Buffett's "Floridays"

The Florida Keys were about the only part of Florida that didn't take a beating last week (Key West High shut out Hallandale 31-0 to improve to 6-1 and close in on a playoff berth), so who better to soothe the pains of the Gators, Hurricanes, Seminoles, Golden Knights and Panthers this week than Jimmy Buffett?

Although we were tempted to turn our tribute to Texas A&M for its inability to focus on Baylor -- a little George Strait might have been fun -- the combined efforts of Florida, Miami, FSU, UCF and FIU were impossible to ignore.

And who knew UCF and Buffett had so much in common? Buffett's "License To Chill" CD dominated the No. 1 spot on the Billboard 200 while UCF -- still the nation's only winless I-A team -- continues to dominate the top spot in the Bottom 10, sitting on No. 1 for the fourth straight week.

Several teams earned their own licenses by scoring victories. Baylor (which nearly sent A&M to the coveted No. 5 slot), Kent State, Central Michigan, Indiana and Tulsa all get the week off. We hear Margaritaville is lovely this time of year.

Everyone else is fair game. So while the players who aren't quite at the legal drinking age will sip virgin margaritas (and don't even try to slip a fake ID past the Bottom 10 bouncers), the rest can enjoy a little bit of blended heaven with the rest of the Parrot Heads.

Don't accuse the Bottom 10 of having an East Coast bias. Just as Mr. Buffett enjoys getting away from Florida and spending some time in Montana, the Bottom 10 enjoys heading west to get away from it all too. In fact, this week we're going all the way to Seattle for the Arizona at Washington Pillow Fight.

With apologies to Steve Harvey, here's this week's Bottom 10:

Waiting list: Arkansas State (2-6), Duke (1-7), Idaho (2-7), Illinois (2-7), Penn State (2-6), San Diego State (2-6), San Jose State (2-5), Tulane (2-5), UNLV (2-6), Utah State (2-6), Vanderbilt (2-6), Wyoming dance team uniforms.