Ali Contest
It's a tough call -- tougher than you think. Why? Because good ol'-fashioned college hoops and good ol'-fashioned . . . (sssshhhh, cover the kids' ears) S-E-X have plenty in common, as Alysse Minkoff discovered when somebody posed the question to her. Plus, Sportoon stumbles onto the Madness all over San Antonio.

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OK, we're truly sorry about Thursday's April Fool's Day prank. You know, that fake writing contest to win a trip to cover the big games? Thing is, we're not sorry for fooling you. We're sorry because your submissions are so good. You make our own writing staff look like amateurs. Here are the best entries.

Pathetic Losers! Daily Quickie
If you're a faithful follower of the Cubs or the Red Sox, consider this fair warning. Page 2's Eric Neel doesn't like your chances of achieving October bliss this year. Again. And he's happy with that.
The Daily Quickie knows Georgia Tech super-sub Will Bynum didn't play against UConn in their November meeting, but still likes the Huskies on Monday night. Plus, Opening Day import, and the Wild NBA West.

It's over. And Page 2 is shocked. Shocked! that Jessica Simpson lost. We thought she was a lock to win our 2004 Wacky Bracket. But no. So . . . all hail Sports Illustrated's swimsuit edition.

The spotlight is at its brightest. The pressure is at its highest. Sometimes, the Final Four brings out the best in a player. It did with the ones on our list of the greatest Final Four performances of the last 25 years.

10]  Isiah Thomas, Indiana, 1981
Isiah scored a game-high 23 points in the Hoosiers' 63-50 win over North Carolina for the championship. But his most important contributions might have been his two quick steals at the start of the second half.
9]  Ed O'Bannon, UCLA, 1995
O'Bannon was unstoppable -- at least, Arkansas star Scotty Thurman couldn't stop him -- en route to 30 points and 17 rebounds in the title game. In the semis, he held Oklahoma State 7-footer Bryant Reeves to seven second-half points.
8]  Steve Alford, Indiana, 1987
How do you follow up a 33-point performance against UNLV in the national semifinals? You score 23 against a Syracuse defense keyed to stop you, and you lead your team to a championship-game victory.

April 3 Oklahoma State 5 Georgia Tech 142
April 3 UConn 2.5 Duke 145.5

Got a comment about something you've seen on Page 2? Here's your chance to sound off to the editors and columnists. Plus, if you'd like to send an e-mail to The Sports Guy, here's your direct link to Bill Simmons.

Paul Hornung's been lecturing people on college admissions policies -- Page 2's Ralph Wiley has a rebuttal.

Some see Candace Parker's dunk as a step forward for women in sports. Jason Whitlock sees it differently.

Page 2's Eric Neel gives you the Scottie Pippen Championships -- a tournament of second fiddles.

Baseball season is here and the Cubs are hot! But who's not?

Don't you feel bad for Paul Hewitt? He's going to be completely overshadowed at this weekend's Final Four.
If your favorite writer isn't on Page 2 today, click here to check out our full roster of columnists.

It's Devil Rays first baseman Tino Martinez (right) and actor Andy Garcia. This match was submitted by Saba of New York City. Browse our archives of past pairings or click here to submit a future duo for Page 2.

NBA: Cleveland at Milwaukee
8:30 p.m. ET, ESPN
LeBron's traveling road show.
Boxing: Friday Night Fights
9 p.m. ET, ESPN2
Trujillo vs. Augustus.
The D.A.
10 p.m. ET, ABC
Real issue: The law vs. the press  
• Complete TV Listings

If you missed Page 2 over the last week, check out our back issues:
• Thur., April 1: Work For Us!
• Wed., March 31: Missing Links
• Tue., March 30: Morning Glory
• Mon., March 29: Say What?

Other featured content:
• Being . . . Allen Iverson
• The 100 Most Memorable Super Bowl Moments
• All-Time World Series Rankings
• 100 Greatest Home Runs of All Time
Weekend Edition, April 2-4, 2004