I got J-Lo, how you like those apples?

What the heck was the soon-to-be twice-divorced J-Lo thinking when she said that Ben Affleck would be her "sexiest man alive" if he lived to be 100?

A. "And Anna Nicole will be so lucky to be married to him."

B. "Unless of course, he's flat broke."

C. "Assuming I'm around and his alimony checks still clear, that is."

D. "Assuming the growth rate of my butt stays consistent until then, I'll be forced to take any man who considers me sexy in the slightest."

E. "'Maid in Manhattan' comes out in a few weeks, and I need to find as many ways as possible to promote it without actually showing clips."

F. "Like he'll make it that long. My bitchiness, vanity, and crushing ego will kill him way before he reaches 100."