ESPN

Buzzmaster

  (10:00 AM)

Goooooooood morning!

dave (nj/wv)

good morning everyone

fred (omaha)

hi buzz, are you ready for roctober? we will watch the games together, go rockies

Mike Singletary (San Francisco)

I've already dropped my pants in disgust because I figure today's chatl be just as crappy as yesterdays.

Cory (PA)

Buzz are you prepared for the amount of whining and complaining you're about to hear for yesterday?

Buzzmaster

  (10:01 AM)

Is it any different than any other day?

RAY GORDON REID ( JACKSON MISSISSIPPI 39201)

MY COMMENT AT 9.55AM I MEAN RIGHT NOW BUZZ THE MORNING AFTERRNOON BUZZ CHAT IS BROUGHT TO BY TOYOTA PIRUS

Jack (NB Canada)

Jello Buzz

Philip Rivers (San Diego)

I got paid!!!!!!!!!!!

Andrew (Indiana)

Seen a lot of reports that the Seattle Seahawks have released T.J. Duckett. Although ESPN has not reported it, is there any truth to this?

Buzzmaster

  (10:02 AM)

Does it matter?

Matt (IN)

Good morning everyone. Your momma.

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

Good morning, Buzz Nation. I would like to nominate Eric Brunlett as an honorary MB member. By messing up twice, he got himself into the record books on his third try at fielding a baseball.

John McEnroe (via mobile)

I gotta come here and chat? YOU CANNOT BE SERIOUS!!

Nate (Madison)

Ok...I'm on the site, but see no chat? It shows up when I change pages for a second but that's it.

Dave (Tallahassee, FL)

good morning

Cory (PA)

Actually, the Seahawks released TJ Houshmandzadeh's rubber ducky. It's easy to see where the confusion arose however.

Matt (East Hartford via Albany) [via mobile]

Mmmmm, I want bacon flavored jello

Nate (Madison)

Nevermind, all fixed.

Tom (West Bloomfield, MI)

Cue Nate's too drunk to see the chat posts . . .

Robbi (Clinton Ky)

Good morning. I just watched the Danyl Johnson audition clip. He's pretty good.

Nate (Madison)

The Cleveland Indians, helping other teams make the playoffs via midseason trades since 2008.

Internet Whiner Guy (Cyberspace)

I hear ya Nate! This chat sucks! It hardly works and then when it does Buzz never posts my comments!

Rich Rodriguez (Ann Arbor)

People who are 2 days late on the Erci Bruntlett triple play need to get lives.

stacy (georgetown ky)

good morning buzz!!!

Brendan (Louisville, KY)

I woke up this early specifically for the MB.

Tom (West Bloomfield, MI)

4 posts between Nate being unable to see the chat and able to see it. That's the quickest any Wisconsin resident has ever sobered up.

Marc (Big D)

Turns out I hate Tuesdays too.

chaz (sa tx)

bacon flavored jello?!!??!?!? u.r.my.hero

Buzzmaster

  (10:05 AM)

Ruckus is going to eat all of yours.

Dave (Tallahassee, FL)

I said it before, I'll say it now: This is where the Dodgers choke and lose. The Rockies are ON FIRE!!!

SteveFitz (Cicero, IL)

252 mega million jackpot. IT'S MINE TONIGHT!!!!

Housh's Rubber Ducky (Seattle)

I'm completely underrated. Ruckus ain't got nothin on me.

Joey (Rutland VT)

Rockies r rolling looking like 07 up in here

Bryan (Charlotte NC)

TJ Duckett is a can't miss for the Falcons.

Nate (Madison)

Hey, anyone out there ever been to Grand Junction, CO? Thoughts?

Robbi (Clinton Ky)

I do not like jello.

Cory (PA)

Bacon Flavored Jello = Semi-congealed bacon grease

Jordan (Peoria)

Nate when we found you, you were too slobbering drunk to buy brandy! (I hope someone knows where that quote is from)

Ruckus (via mobile)

chaz always leaves his clothes on the floor. I think I've found a new bathroom.

chaz (sa tx)

?!?!?!?!? really? ruckus? Really?Ruckus?

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

Hey if I started a FFL on the ESPN site strictly for MBers, would anyone be interested?

Matt (East Hartford via Albany) [via mobile]

I have no idea what's going on, and I like it

Nate (Madison)

Splash some cold water on your face and it quickly clears up your vision.

Justin (Chicago)

So, another round of bad and overly-repeated jokes? I'm in.

Joey (Rutland VT)

Mike needs to chill and "B easy" come on dude is 20 yrs old a multi millionaire in NBA and his life isn't worth livin?? Puuhlease man I will trade w/ him any time

Cookie Monster (Sesame Street)

C is for Cookie. Cookie is for me.

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

Between the time I showered and got dressed today my dog ate 1/2 of a loaf of bread, three spinach tortillas, and one of those big cookies from Perkins. My poor wife may have a nasty cleanup when she gets home from work.

Buzzmaster

  (10:08 AM)

Why won't you have a nasty cleanup when you get home from work?

Justin (Chicago)

Jello is the most overrated food in the world. It sucks bad style.

Jacob (Santa Rosa Beach,FL)

The Rockies are hot Brett Farve is not.I think that the Rockies have a better chance at winning the NL than Brett Farve and the Vikings winning the Super Bowl.

Buzzmaster

  (10:08 AM)

Thank you for that.

Brian (Madison, WI)

A FFL with you clowns? Sure bring it on!

Cory (PA)

I might be, but only if you sweetened the deal with a few more acronyms.

Dan (Buffalo, NY)

Rockies of 07, huh? Does that mean they'll roll over in the WS again?

chaz (sa tx)

in other news the cookie monster has been replaced by the veggie monster for health concerns in our young children. "V is for veggie..." gotta love the onion.

Dave (Tallahassee, FL)

Manny lost his groove probably because of the suspension but more because he has to be clean, LOL

Ruckus (via mobile)

Chaz I wanna go visit Pennsylvania. Get on it.

Robbi (Clinton Ky)

Wait, you had all that out where the dog could reach it?

Ed Hochuli (Chat Ref)

That's illegal procedure against Dave for using "LOL" in the chat. We don't tolerate that crap around here. 5 yards and repeat 1st down.

Nate (Madison)

It's not cheating because it's YOUR dog...

Trevor (Texas)

Had my first day of grad school yesterday...this one guy stabbed another guy with a knife, the professor kept lecturing even with a dead guy in the room.

Cory (PA)

No, Manny just can't play as hard anymore because he's worried about the health of his fetus. He's pregnant remember

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

She gets home from work three hours before I do.

Buzzmaster

  (10:10 AM)

You better watch out. She might leave it for you.

Tom (West Bloomfield, MI)

Actual quote from an article I read this morning: "Accused of the gruesome death of his ex-wife, a model whose body was so badly mutilated it had to be identified by her breast implants' serial numbers, Jenkins evaded a massive international manhunt for days as he crossed from California into his native Canada."

Buzzmaster

  (10:10 AM)

What kind of sick crap are you into?

Bob (Lowell)

Sorry I'm late. Some teams played baseball yesterday and a couple of football teams played also. That should be enough sport's talk for today.

Johnstone (Wicker Park)

Woke up this early? It's 9 in Kentucky, that's not early...

Justin (Chicago)

Yeah, she'll leave the house in the sun and make you clean it up the next day, even though she doesn't want the house to smell.

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

Robbi: She's an Irish Setter. She's got a reach like Dikembe Mutumbo.

Ryan (San Diego)

Ruckus for ROY MB poster...cracks me up

Michael Vick (Philly)

I got paid. Drinks on the house!!!!

Cory (PA)

Who could have known J.B.'s plan to teach his dog to use stilts could have gone so horribly awry?!

chaz (sa tx)

pennsylviania? why what did i miss?...wait..,.. am i responding to my own dog on a chat room?

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

Hmm, I can see Brian's team name now: Passed Out in Wisconsin.

SteveFitz (Cicero, IL)

So did Elmo's dad lose his job or not? Channel 11 was going to do some special about Elmo's dad losing his job. I didn't even know it had a dad.

Tom (West Bloomfield, MI)

I'd be into that MB FFL league.

Dan (Buffalo, NY)

SN got cancelled already?

Buzzmaster

  (10:12 AM)

No, just the chat. Too much to do for the show.

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

I wouldn't think she would, Buzz. The smell wouldn't be tolerable for three hours on a hot, summer day.

Buzzmaster

  (10:12 AM)

Can you say happy hour with her friends?

Tom (West Bloomfield, MI)

It was an article about a reality contestant who killed his model-wife, fled to Canada, and committed suicide in a seedy motel. How could I resist reading that?

Buzzmaster

  (10:12 AM)

Sicko.

Nate (Madison)

Sign me up for a MB FFL

Justin (Chicago)

Is the SN decision final? or just for today?

Buzzmaster

  (10:13 AM)

For the near future.

Cory (PA)

Thanks for the wrap-up Bob, Jolly well done!

SteveFitz (Cicero, IL)

Buzz, I posted that when we were talking about the Cookie Monster, sunject changed, keep up you lazy fat turd....I mean that in a nice way.

JB (TX)

That quote was from the story about the VH1 reality show dude who killed his wife. Apparently dude yanked all her teeth and also her fingernails. Uggh...

Dave (Tallahassee, FL)

I'm in 6 leagues already, my wife won't allow another draft party.

Dan (Buffalo, NY)

Buzz is slowly being phased out I think.

Brendan (Louisville, KY)

Steve is a jerk.

Nate (Madison)

Buzz, how have you not heard of that story?

Buzzmaster

  (10:14 AM)

I don't get out much.

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

Look, I didn't do it on purpose and I've already called her with a heads up on what might happen. Maybe I'll go home at lunch time to check on things before she gets home. Probably a nice thing to do.

Neal (Philly)

One of my good friends is missing my birthday for the 4th year in a row for a fantasy football draft. Apparently he's not much of a friend.

Buzzmaster

  (10:14 AM)

You'd think after two or three years, you'd get the hint.

Tom (West Bloomfield, MI)

Actually, he didn't so much as yank her fingernails as cut off her fingertips. Disgusting.

Big Z (via mobile)

Buzz I think todays 'sunject' should be 'brinner'

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

So then there will no longer be SNTV chat or just for today?

Buzzmaster

  (10:16 AM)

For now, no more.

Tom (West Bloomfield, MI)

Your fault, Neal, for being born during FFL draft season.

Dave (vt)

who schedules their birthday near fantasy football time? Weddings too

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

Dave: It's an autodraft. You just have to pre-rank your players and the draft will run without needing to have everyone tied up for hours on end.

Brendan (Louisville, KY)

and you weren't even invited to the FF draft. Not much of a friend

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

OK sounds like we have some interest. I'll get a league created during the chat and will send out the name. I'll go 12 teams. Sound good?

Ryan (San Diego)

Goodbye afternoon buzz

Justin (Chicago)

Buzz, will ESPN fly us all over to your house for the Draft party? Better question, will Matt Damon be there?

JB (TX)

You don't get out much because you're fat. Finish the quote, Buzz.

Dave (Tallahassee, FL)

Who's to say Buzz isn't in the restroom on a laptop?

Cory (PA)

I say we pick the best players at the wrong times. Round 1 runs on kickers and Defenses.

Bryan (Charlotte NC)

I see plenty of magazines about fantasy football but none about your birthday.

Pete Rose (Casino)

I bet SN chat never comes back. Anyone wanna take that action?

Johnstone (Wicker Park)

I blame El Nino for all of this.

Ryan (San Diego)

R.I.P. afternoon buzz

SteveFitz (Cicero, IL)

My best friend never shows up to my son's bday parties, but he buys the best gifts. He's a keeper invite even if he never shows.

Trevor (Texas)

That could acutally be a new show starring Buzz...CSI: Bristol

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

That's too bad. I really liked the 4:00 PM chat.

Don (San Francisco)

How else are we going to tell Michelle that we think her dress looks nice today?

Ruckus (tx)

I ate the Sportsnation TV chat...sorry guys

Neal (Philly)

Is the show cancelled too, Buzz, or just the chat?

Buzzmaster

  (10:18 AM)

Just the chat.

Matt (IN)

No SNTV chat sucks. Now I will actually have to work during my last hour here.

Dean (Vermont)

Anyone else envisioning a 'Fargo'-like scenerio where desperate Green Bay fans stage a kidnapping of Favre that goes horribly wrong and requires Marge Gunderson to get to the bottom of it? YOU BETCHA!

chaz (sa tx)

Ruckus no!

Jeremy (Fayetteville)

Buzz, can we change the topic to college football?

Buzzmaster

  (10:19 AM)

You can try to do whatever you want. Free country and all.

Bryan (Charlotte)

So Buzz when you say just the chat do you mean the show or the chat?

Buzzmaster

  (10:19 AM)

Very funny.

Buzz (The Suits office)

Guys I just cant handle this kind of workload. It's just too much for me to take. What? Yeah, I'll get some coffee...

SteveFitz (Cicero, IL)

J.B., 16 teams, 4 divisions, I'm in.

Matt (East Hartford via Albany) [via mobile]

The only league the MB should have is a bizarro league

chaz (sa tx)

i am going to post a onb tonight of what ruckus did one time, has to do with a 29" red drum, trash bag and 5 days in hot summer. too much to write right now.

Tom (West Bloomfield, MI)

No, Jeremy. No we may not.

Trevor (Texas)

Jeremy, can you change your chat page to "Your Take on First Take"?

Buzzmaster

  (10:20 AM)

That's a negative.

Zach (Bloomington,MN)

As soon as they realized SNTV chat was so full of fail that they couldn't read it on air, well,that was the end of it.

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

League has been created. It is called, 'Morning Buzz Slackers FFL.' Draft date is set for Sunday, September 6th at 5:00 AM. First 9 to join are in (sorry it wouldn't let me go to 12). Thanks for the interest.

Buzzmaster

  (10:21 AM)

Really? I think I've seen other leagues with more teams. Wonder why it wouldn't let you do that.

Brian (Madison, WI)

Brett Favre is not worth the effort that it would take to kidnap him.

Buzzmaster

  (10:22 AM)

Yeah. This sounds like a very, very, very poor man's Ace Ventura, the first one.

Dave (vt)

red rum? ruckus murdered someone?

Ryan (San Diego)

5 am huh...that's pretty aggressive

Dan (Buffalo, NY)

5 am on a sunday? nice try

Don (San Francisco)

A very very very poor man's Ace Ventura stars the guy from the "Ernest Goes to Camp" movies

Michael Beasley (Miami)

Hey Buzz you want to head to the back of this chat and smoke and take pictures of it.

Brendan (Louisville, KY)

Good point Buzz, people actually care about Dan Marino.

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

I could have done it in a custom league but I'd have to ask for private information and I don't want to do that.

Buzzmaster

  (10:24 AM)

Good point.

Bob (Lowell)

Relax people...he already told you it's an autodraft. You don't have to get up at 5 am.

Ryan (San Diego)

I guess that means 2 am PT so right about when I might be coming home from the bars on Saturday night, wow, that would make for an interesting draft

Marcus (MN)

Ernest is dead man, sorry to break the bad news.

Anthony (NY)

Hey Buzz. Told you no SN TV yesterday.

Buzzmaster

  (10:24 AM)

No, you said it was on at 5, which it wasn't either. You were wrong, sucker.

Tom (West Bloomfield, MI)

So much for us being slackers. There are already 7 teams in there.

Dave (Tallahassee, FL)

JB - I joined, shhh don't tell the wife.

Cory (PA)

I will set my autopick to cause havoc...Who needs RBs?!

Brett Favre (via mobile)

I hope Brian or Nate pick me.

Drew (Buffalo)

I have nothing to contribute to this chat today..... at all.... thought I'd let you know

Rich Rodriguez (Ann Arbor)

People who haven't requested the ONB yet need to get lives.

Buzzmaster

  (10:26 AM)

Let's do it....

SLIM CHI-TOWN [via mobile]

Quick question...what is the ONB?

ONB Warning Label (ONB)

The ONB is an over the counter drug used to treat problems with common sense and good grammar. It is used in patients with multiple risk factors, such as enjoying soccer, being from the Northeast, or being a member of PETA. When diet and exercise are not enough alone, ONB is used with ALL CAPS and a few drinks to increase the stupidity level. If you take the ONB, please tell your doctor if you feel any new muscle pain or weakness. This could be a sign of rare but serious muscle side effects. The most common side effects are gas, constipation, stomach pain and heartburn. They tend to be mild but never go away.

Ozzie Guillen (Chicago)

Buzz what the $#% is going on here? No %$% show yesterday? How in the $% am I going to protect my players without your %$% show being on?

Rich Rodriguez (Ann Arbor)

Chat hosts who can't remember if they have a show on or not need to get lives. Even The Pulse has one of those.

roger sims (Plant city floridA)

hello? i have a comment for Buzzmaster. buzz, why was their no show yesterday? People want to see the show but It wasnt on. Know one told us before hand that their wiould be no show i think that espN needs to get someone whose more competent to run things because you arent doing a good job im tired of thinking the show will be on and its not. you suck buzz

The Suits (Bristol)

Buzzard, we've had it with this crap. You don't even know our schedule. We do not pay you the small bucks to screw around with our viewers like this. Step it up or you'll be washing dishes in ESPN's cafeteria.

Max (MN) [via mobile]

Chilltooooown!

Lee (Hernando, MS)

I was listening to beano cook on the jason smith show on the way home from work at 2 am this morning. you guys need to send him for a drug test, for he is as high as a kite to say that the land of the loosin' irish will go 11-1 or maybe 12-0 and play the gators for the bcs championship. good lord, is it that tough around there that ya'll need to bring on springer types to make ridiculous statements like that? if he had said ole miss (which i am a huge fan of) would go 11-1 or just possibly, if the stars all line up just right, 12-0 i could have maybe found that an interesting thought. but notre dame? get spencer and heidy on too...

Jason (Madison, WI)

I'm a huge laker fan, and have been my whole life... and as you can guess, im a huge kobe fan too. I just want to know why everyone is saying his number will be down, and that he wont be as motivated this year? I see the lakers being better than last year, winning close to 70 games (if not 70 of a few more). With Ron Artest, and Lamar Odom signing, I dont know how people can say they wont be as tough to beat? Are they all saying this because people think Kobe will have better players surrounding him this year, or what?

michael p (illlinois)

i hope joe mauer will hit 400 cause i have a jersaey card of him

wendy (boston,ma)

Thank God!! Gruden is terrific....I can turn the sound back on for MNF!

Jared (New York)

Do you think Mark Sanchez was a good pick for the Jets? And, who will get the starting job and get better or more famous.

Buzzmaster

  (10:27 AM)

And that's it.....

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

Maybe someone else can start another league for anyone else interested. It will at least give us chat topics through football season.

Ruckus (sa tx)

WOOF WOOF,= onb time buzz

Brendan (Louisville, KY)

Buzz. No.

Cory (PA)

Brett Favre = No. 1 pick. Adrian peterson = Overrated

stephanie (cincy)

Why do your wives care if you guys play Fantasy Football? I don't get that

Neal (Philly)

I actually liked the ONB Warning Label post.

VH1 (cable)

Sorry, but we're going to cancel Megan Wants to Marry a Millionaire because of that murderer. Now you'll never know if Megan finds true love with a millionaire. Have fun sleeping at night.

Ryan (San Diego)

Jersey cards, might as well be a lottery ticket you're holding

Zach (Bloomington,MN)

Buzz.Yes.

JB (TX)

I agree, I think Gruden is a good fit on MNF.

chaz (sa tx)

wow.... i. think. i really really liked the onb today.....

Johnstone (Wicker Park)

We have a fantasy IT draft. The Lithuanian programmer is a for sure first pick.

Robbi (Clinton Ky)

I have always liked Gruden.

Christian (High Point, NC)

What did I miss?

Buzzmaster

  (10:29 AM)

Ruckus made a mess in JB's house, right next to Brian and Nate's mess and Ryan (San Diego) is going to clean it up.

Zach (Bloomington,MN)

Gruden is teh awesomesauce

Cory (PA)

Can we make the ONB warning a permanent fixture? that should always pre-empt ONB exposure

Dave (Tallahassee, FL)

Steph - Time spent not on them, that's why

Tom (West Bloomfield, MI)

chaz likes the ONB, but he also likes eating from the garbage . . . or is that his dog. I'm getting them confused now.

Robbi (Clinton Ky)

Geez chaz, get some meds.

Matt (South Bend, IN)

Buzz...have you ever seen a football team play two quarterbacks...AT THE SAME TIME?

Ryan (San Diego)

Why am I cleaning it up? You're the janitor

Tom (West Loop)

An ONB warning is a great idea. That way I can go to another web page until it's gone...

Cory (PA)

And TJ Houshmandzadeh lost his rubber ducky. I still feel this is pertinent.

Dan (Buffalo, NY)

have we figured out why it took 15 min. for the police to show up to Steph's restaurant when the cook was murdered?

Buzzmaster

  (10:31 AM)

Cuz it's NYC. It takes everyone 15 minutes to get anywhere.

Nate (Madison)

FFL, I"m in.

Cory (PA)

Dan, they forgot to make a reservation. *rimshot*

Dan (Buffalo, NY)

Or because it's a farse

JB (TX)

2 QB's at the same time: remember at the end of Remember the Titans when they run that reverse to the Rev? Sunshine was still on the field. There you go, 2 QBs. You're welcome.

Johnny (Scranton, PA)

Still two spots left in the FFL.

Tom (West Bloomfield, MI)

Still 2 spots open in the MB FFL.

stephanie (cincy)

Mid town traffic and the fact that all the cops were out looking for Son of Sam

Michael Scott (Scranton)

Hey Buzz, you don't do you job very efficiently. Boom. Roasted.

Brendan (Louisville, KY)

Is it pointless to hit on waitresses at places like Hooters?

Buzzmaster

  (10:33 AM)

Only if you can do it in a unique way. I'm sure they get hit on every table they wait on.

Johnny (Scranton, PA)

That's funny. It sometimes takes a whole hour in this chat to get nowhere.

stephanie (cincy)

How about they get a life of their own? I mean, how much time does it take up?

Cory (PA)

MBFFL: Morning Buzz Farm Fresh Loving. Matt Damon tested, LadyBuzz approved.

JB (TX)

I would get in that fantasy league, but I feel no need to dominate in there like i do in this chat daily. Also, I'll be in Vegas, so as I will be awake at 5 a.m. I won't be anywhere near a laptop.

Jeremy (Ohio)

I am heading to Mexico this weekend. I am going to be disappointed if I don't get swine flu

A Rod (via mobile)

Fact: If you go to Hooters, only tip 15%

Robbi (Clinton Ky)

Remember the Titans, one of my favorite movies.

SteveFitz (Cicero, IL)

Hitting on waitresses at Hooters = not pointless

Bob (Lowell)

When did Sam misplace his son?

Dave (Tallahassee, FL)

Steph - you are rare indeed.

Spelling Police (here)

Alright Dan, pull it over. That post of yours was a farce.

Brendan (Louisville, KY)

Exactly, Buzz. But doing something unique with one waitress means they all will find out about it, so you have to keep coming up with new stuff every time.

Cory (PA)

Jeremy, we'll all be disappointed if you don't get swine flu.

JB (TX)

dude, she's a Hooters waitress. It's not like you're hitting on Elle MacPherson. Go for it.

Don (San Francisco)

How many waitresses are you trying to hit on? If it doesn't work, are you going to ask for a different table?

Christian (High Point, NC)

Never hit on a waitress at Hooters, strip club, etc. Just talk to them as if they were a normal person. After a couple times doing this (ask to be seated in their section in subsequent trips if they're working), you should be able to gauge whether or not they have any real interest in you.

Buzzmaster

  (10:37 AM)

Of course they have interest in you...they're milking you for tips and the rest of your money.

Marc (Charlotte)

I'm late Buzz. Fill me in.

Buzzmaster

  (10:37 AM)

Nope. I won't.

Zach (Bloomington,MN)

Buzz speaks the truth

Godish (Chicago)

Happy 65th Birthday Smokey the Bear!

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

Brendan: Before you start hitting on waitresses, watch the South Park episode with Butters and the girls from 'Raisins.' You'll change your mind.

Tom (West Bloomfield, MI)

In college a friend of mine, who is a HUGE nerd (go figure), got kissed by a Hooters waitress after she spilled water on him. There are no words to describe the color red he turned.

Buzzmaster

  (10:38 AM)

And thus ends the story of Tom's...errr, I mean...his "friend's" first kiss.

Bob (Lowell)

Buzz speaks with his mouth full.

JB (TX)

Bad strategy, Christian. Showing up in their section repeatedly makes you look like a stalker.

Brendan (Louisville, KY)

Buzz is smart, like Jeopardy smart.

Tom (West Bloomfield, MI)

That was pretty funny, Buzz. Good one.

Brian (Madison, WI)

Nate is the biggest sucker I know for falling for strippers "interest" in him.

SteveFitz (Cicero, IL)

Well played buzz.

Matt (IN)

Smokey is only 5 years older than Gene Simmons.

Buzzmaster

  (10:39 AM)

And 75 years younger than Clinton.

Neal (Philly)

I went to Hooter's for my birthday (before I turned 21) and they made me stand on a chair and dance while they sang to me.

Christian (High Point, NC)

A stalker sits in the section next to where she's working, JB.

chaz (sa tx)

san antonio llws plays cali today. we going to kill it.

Alex (Littleton, CO)

Back from 10 days in PHX. I'll miss not working, but I won't miss 108 Degrees. In related news it's 70's and partly cloudy here.

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

Thing is if you keep going to Hooters to hit on the waitresses and continue to eat the food, you will eventually pack on a pile of weight thus making you unattractive to the waitresses.

Robbi (Clinton Ky)

I had a friend that married a stripper. Big mistake.

Cory (PA)

Yes Alex, but it's always sunny in Philadelphia

SteveFitz (Cicero, IL)

hahaha Christian = stalker expert

stephanie (cincy)

Getting married to begin with =Big mistake

Ryan (San Diego)

chaz, ummm have you seen the cali team? They have a guy who's 6'2 and they hit about 50 homers in their last 8 games. Thanks for coming

Nate (Madison)

I'd rather talk to the girl bartenders at the strip club, than the dancers. That's if I had to chose.

Rick Pitino (Louisville)

I'll give Steph $3k for being correct.

Robbi (Clinton Ky)

Agreed.

Tom (West Bloomfield, MI)

It's only always sunny in philadelphia to the guys bleeding out from stab wounds who get confused seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.

chaz (sa tx)

ryan, ummm yes i have. keep underestimating us. we like it.

Cory (PA)

But the San Antonio team has ruckus for a mascot. Plus, he poisoned their big league chew

Don (San Francisco)

Hooters waitresses just get in the way of the food. Am I right Buzz? ....cause your fat?

SteveFitz (Cicero, IL)

I've dated strippers, well, niot *dated*, but dated. It was always fun while it lasted.

Buzzmaster

  (10:44 AM)

Until you ran out of singles and had to go home.

Marc (Charlotte)

Don't mess with Ryan. He knows all about the Tee Ball and Little League baseball seen in Cali. Just don't wear flip flops to the game.

Dan (Buffalo, NY)

maybe your ex just got tired of your stories Steph, ever think of that?

Drew (Buffalo)

I got a waitresses number at a strip club once. Never called though. It was a nice confidence booster though

Buzzmaster

  (10:44 AM)

Good thing you never called, because I'm sure it was a wrong number.

SteveFitz (Cicero, IL)

Singles? Buzz, I'm like Ted DiBiasi, don't insult me.

Zach (Bloomington,MN)

Superstar mode in Madden is the least fun you will ever have playing a video game

chaz (sa tx)

wrong number or rejection hotline Drew.

Spelling Police (here)

Marc, you've caused a scene with your poor spelling. Here's your ticket.

Tom (West Bloomfield, MI)

She gave Drew the number for off track betting.

Ryan (San Diego)

Marc, I've been scouting this team for years. Maybe the best collection of youngsters I've seen since the Sandlot beatdown

Zach (Bloomington,MN)

Or she gave him the number of her husband

stephanie (cincy)

Dan, I left him because I got tired of his........well, everything.

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

Off to a very good start with the FFL. I'm figuring all 10 teams will be filled by tomorrow's chat at the latest. Thanks for the support, MBers.

Dan (Buffalo, NY)

867-5309

Robbi (Clinton Ky)

Truth: I once gave a guy the dial a prayer number.

SteveFitz (Cicero, IL)

Farmers almanac = cold starts in September and lots of snow this winter. Just sayin.

Chris (Philly)

Wow Buzz is on fire today! Did LadyBuzz burn your Poptarts or something?

Bob (Lowell)

Drew, when a girl gives you a number that begins 888, it's always best to move on.

Brian (Madison, WI)

My co-workers once emailed me saying a client had a problem and gave the phone number. I called it and it was some psychiatric hotline. They thought it was hilarious.

Rejected by Robbi (Clinton KY)

She didn't even give me any of that unsweet tea.

Chris (MPLS)

I'd like to play FF! The winner should get LadyBuzz

Buzzmaster

  (10:49 AM)

She barely puts up with me. Do you think she's going to put up with any of you?

Don (San Francisco)

I bet Robbi also ignored his facebook request.

stephanie (cincy)

Too early for lunch chat Buzz? If not I am having a chicken Caesar salad from Whole foods.

Marc (Charlotte)

Why do Farmers need their own almanac?

Tea Drinkers (Here)

Sweet Tea > Unsweet Tea

Ruckus (sa tx)

chaz always hits on the receptionist at the vet. it's pretty embarassing for me. like a car wreck, but i can't look away

Chris (MPLS)

I'll bring her to a fine dinner at the nicest BK Lounge you'll ever see!

Matt Damon (Buzz's House)

LadyBuzz is spoken for.

Marc (Charlotte)

Lunch: Angel Hair Pasta, Garlic Bread and a Cupcake

SteveFitz (Cicero, IL)

This one girl gave my buddy the 800-588-2300 phone number. I knew what it was right away, but he didn't and he called it.

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

Lunch: Due to guilt obtained in this morning's chat, I will go to check for messes from the dogs. If all is clear, off to BK for a grilled chicken sandwich, onion rings, and a diet soda. If not, lunchtime will be unappetizing for certain.

Robbi (Clinton Ky)

Lunch: Chef salad, unsweet tea.

Christian (High Point, NC)

Lunch chat! Apple walnut salad (homemade)

Nate (Madison)

Lunch: Diet Dew and leftover lasagna

Alex (Littleton, CO)

Lunch: BBQ Beef Brisket, Mac N Cheese

stephanie (cincy)

Buzz, LB sounds like a woman with her own life. She's a keeper

Buzzmaster

  (10:51 AM)

She is. I just have to convince her to make sure she sticks around.

Chris (MPLS)

Lunch: BK Lounge with or without LadyBuzz

Neal (Philly)

Lunch: something healthy

Zach (Bloomington,MN)

Lunch:Chicken Quesadilla and Specher root beer

Brian (Madison, WI)

Lunch: Wendy's or Taco Bell. Haven't had either of them in a while and I know I pass them when I go to run the errands I have to run at lunhc.

Jeremy (Dallas)

Lunch: Chik-fil-A, its was off the breakfast menu though, pretty good

Cory (PA)

Lunch: Subway on account of all the Scrabble

SteveFitz (Cicero, IL)

Potential reality show - Chuck Norris, Steven Seagal and Sean Claude Van Damm living together. It's being talked about. Wow.

Dave (Tallahassee, FL)

Buzz don't leave your wet towel on the bed and always, ALWAYS replace the toilet paper roll.

Alex (Littleton, CO)

Buzz just has to convince Matt Damon to stick around, and Lady Buzz will be there.

Zach (Bloomington,MN)

Alex is it Bubba's? Bubba's BBQ is awesome

Matt (IN)

Lunch will be spent running errands. Will probably pick something up from BK.

Rickey Henderson (Hall of Fame)

Lunch: Greatness

Tom (West Bloomfield, MI)

Unsweet tea beats sweet tea anyday.

Dave (Tallahassee, FL)

Last night's pizza and Dr. Pepper

Don (San Francisco)

Lunch: Hitting on the sandwich maker at Quizno's

chaz (sa tx)

lunch. not sure but for dinner going to try and make bacon flavored jello.

Buzzmaster

  (10:53 AM)

Make sure you clean up the mess Ruckus makes with the garbage.

ruckus (sa tx)

lunch: whatever chaz does not eat.

SteveFitz (Cicero, IL)

Lunch - Grilled chicken with corn

Marc (Charlotte)

Who's Sean Claude Van Damme? Is that Jean Claude Van Damme's brother?

Cory (PA)

Sean Claude Van Damme...is he Jean's brother who didn't get knocked out at Scores?

Jeremy (Dallas)

Tom, we've had enough of your ridiculous yankee comments. reg tea over sweet tea, not one american-loving american can sit and enojy a regular tea

Nate (Madison)

So my mom has the history of trying to pick out a girl for me that either is not good looking or extremely annoying to me. Well I have to say, she is trying to set me up with one now and I'm fairly impressed. I relate my mom's performance in this instance to Chris Bosio throwing a no-hitter.

Marc (Charlotte)

Fact: Stallone is coming out with a movie in 2010 that has all the action stars from the late 80's/early 90's. Seagal, Stallone, Dolph Lundgren, etc, etc. I believe its called "The Expendables"

chaz (sa tx)

the combination lock i have put on the trash has helped.

Anthony (NY)

Lunch: Burger with fries and a pickle

stephanie (cincy)

And don't put that wet towel in the laundry basket, it gets mildewy and affects all the other laundry. And put down the toilet seat. Follow these simple rules and she will stick around

Buzzmaster

  (10:55 AM)

That's too much pressre.

Brendan (Louisville, KY)

Jeremy is a truth sayer

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

Chaz has entered the FFL and has Ruckus as part of his team name.

JB (TX)

Lunch: Drive thru, then take the car to get a tail light bulb. Exciting, I know. FYI, the real key to picking up waitresses or bartenders is seeing them on a non-busy night like Tuesday or Wednesday, less busy, less competition. Trust me, you're not charming enough to woo her on a Friday night.

Darren (Raleigh, NC)

With ESPN now showing EPL and LA Liga football, isn't it about time that Sportscenter show some regular highlights to help further the sport in this country?

Buzzmaster

  (10:56 AM)

Try watching SportsCenter before you complain, OK?

Buzzmaster

  (10:56 AM)

And why is it SportsCenter's responsibility to further the sport in this country?

Nate (Madison)

Marc: The Expendables.

Ryan (San Diego)

What does the wet towel matter? Isn't it all dirty laundry that will be washed anyways?

Nate (Madison)

Costs me thousands of dollars to get to graduation time, now costs me another $40 to get out. Lame.

J.B. (Dunmore, PA)

We do like two loads of laundry in our house every day so nothing gets a chance to get mildewy.

Brendan (Louisville, KY)

the UFL is only a month away!!!!

Dean (Vermont)

Lunch: yogurt and granola. ...so sad. I know, I know. And you thought being an aging hippie was easy?

Marc (Charlotte)

Didn't I say it was called "The Expendables"?

Tom (West Bloomfield, MI)

Sounds like steph had a lot of petty reasons for that divorce.

Bob (Lowell)

I've never bought into that "put down the toilet seat" crap. Why the hell can't women lift it up?

Kids (everywhere)

ESPN has let us down! We're ruined!

Cory (PA)

You can't expect us to actually WATCH something before complaining about it...

Jordan (Peoria)

My wife doesnt care about that whole putting the toilet lid down thing...Why do some women makes this a deal breaker? Is it too hard for them to lower the seat?

Buzz (ESPN)

Lunch: Everything

Ruckus ((chaz's house))

I got a lady friend coming over for lunch today. chaz put out some fine garbage for my date!

Darren (Raleigh, NC)

ESPN dropped $$$millions on the EPL rights in England, I think they are pretty concerned about it. Live Sportscenter is awful, the ones before 9am are so much better.

Buzzmaster

  (11:00 AM)

No, I would think they'd be concerned about it in England, where it is being broadcast and it has a huge following and is hugely successful.

Nate (Madison)

I once had a lady friend sit down and fall in because I forgot to lower it after myself. I thought it was hilarious, her.....not so much.

Don (San Francisco)

So basically we've covered courtship, marriage and divorce in one chat. Great work MB!

Urban Meyer (Gainesville)

You're either for the seat being lowered or against it. If you're for it, stop by the ESPN restrooms and your restroom attendant Buzz will make sure that your seat gets lowered for you.

Cory (PA)

It's time to talk about sports! Oops...out of time.

Ruckus (sa tx)

You gotta problem with that J.B?

Buzzmaster

  (11:01 AM)

OK. We're done here. Thanks for stopping by everyone. We'll be back tomorrow morning. Until then, stay classy SportsNation!

Brendan (Louisville, KY)

Lunch: PROTEIN SHAKES, HYPODERMIC NEEDLES, AND IRON!

Jordan (Peoria)

Seriously who doesnt look whether the lid is up when they are about to sit down!

stephanie (cincy)

The petty stuff just piled on the real stuff, like he was boring and mean

Dave (Tallahassee, FL)

Ever hear a woman fall into the toilet, very very funny. Then you get the look.

MK (Wilmington NC)

Notice that women complain about the seat not being down, but the same women wont put the lid down when they lift that... they are just as guilty as guys

Jordan (Peoria)

If a woman falls in the toilet and no one is around to nag, how many of her friends will she tell?

Jeremy (Dallas)

Guys, just stop flushing all together, I man don't flush anything. The girls will eventually start using another bathroom in the house. Then we're off the hook