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June 26, 12:05 PM ET
Chat with Page 2's Bill Simmons

Bill Simmons
  (3:31 PM)

Sorry for the late notice, there's so much going on today that i couldn't resist chatting for a few minutes... or a few hundred minutes...

Justin (Wheaton)

Does anyone really expect you to talk about Wimbledon? Do you really expect yourself to talk about Wimbledon?

Bill Simmons
  (3:32 PM)

If sports gambling was legal, I'd like Andy Roddick as a sleeper at 11-to-1. (And... we're done with Wimbledon.)

Bill Simmons
  (3:32 PM)

If sports gambling was legal, I'd like Andy Roddick as a sleeper at 11-to-1. (And... we're done with Wimbledon.)

Rob (Baltimore)

Glad to see you are still alive after hearing the Celtics considered giving up Jefferson and the #5 for Jermaine O'neil.

Bill Simmons
  (3:35 PM)

I'm barely alive. The sad thing was - I had planned on writing a mailbag yesterday for today, but the KG rumors started and I was so distracted that i couldn't get anything done. I'm living in perpetual fear that the Celtics are going to do something even dumber than the Baker trade 5 years ago. It's terrible. I can't handle it. There's nothing worse than being helpless as your favorite team might do something that could kill the franchise for the next 6 years.


BS, I hear it might be Green, 5th pick, Ratliff, Perkins, and Bassy to get JO. WOuld you do that?

Bill Simmons
  (3:36 PM)

Yes, I would do this. It's a logical trade and we'd become a contender in the East with the Pierce-Jefferson-JO trio. In fact, it's so logical, it probably won't happen.

Brian (Danbury, CT)

Seriously...there's no way the C's can give up Jefferson. Not even for KG, let alone O'Neal.

Bill Simmons
  (3:37 PM)

I agree. There's no reason to trade him. None. Either use Ratliff and the No. 5 (and either some other stuff) to get a 3rd big gun, or trade Pierce and go in the other direction. My head hurts. I'm so bummed out by this. I don't trust the people running this team at all - every NBA connection I have has been telling me that the Celtics have been in full-scale panic mode since 8:00AM on May 23rd. They're an easy mark. Everyone knows they need to make a trade.

rob, nc

Any comment on the Benoit situation, is this the end of pro wrestling, it seems like it would be hard to watch again after this.

Bill Simmons
  (3:41 PM)

I am still gathering my thoughts, waiting for all the facts to come out. It just doesn't seem like any non-wrestling fan realizes how huge this story is to everyone who actually follows wrestling - in my opinion, it's the biggest sports story of the year even though wrestling technically isn't a sport. Benoit was one of the 12-15 greatest wrestlers of the past 30 years. For the wrestling world, it's like the OJ thing all over again - only its worse because his little son was involved. It might be the single worst sports story since the Rae Carruth thing.

Bill Simmons
  (3:43 PM)

The weird part was the WWE inexplicably running the 3-hour Benoit tribute on Raw last night - by the time it re-aired on the West Coast, reports were starting to come out that it was possibly a double murder-suicide... I don't know how they let that show continue to run. One of the weirdest TV moments ever. I was really creeped out.

Carl (Lansing, MI)

How come people condem wresting becuase of this but not the football because of Rae Carruth? Is it becuase people are looking for a reason to bash it? I never really liked it a ton after college, but I never understood why people have so much HATE for it.

Bill Simmons
  (3:45 PM)

Well, the bigger issue here is that pro wrestling has suffered an abnormal number of early deaths - actually, abnormal might not even be the right word. it's almost an epidemic. There have probably been more wrestlers die before the age of 45 in the past 15 years than every sport combined. And you knew the tipping point was coming, eventually, and now it's here. I don't know if wrestling will survive this one.

Adam (NY)

So what does WWE do from here? With the macmahon death awkwardness floating over their heads I think they're going to lose a huge portion of their audience. They have to, right?

Bill Simmons
  (3:48 PM)

Honestly, I couldn't tell you. I think this could be it - it's going to be the dominant story of the next 2 weeks and everyone is going to bring up the death stats and all the crazy incidents that have happened, I don't think the average person realizes what a damaging sport this has been (physically and psychologically) to the people who do it. Again, I think we've reached the tipping point. Sorry to be so somber, but the Benoit thing... i mean, it's hard to explain how big he was in wrestling circles.

Bill Simmons
  (3:49 PM)

All right, let's switch gears...

Shannon (Martinsburg WV)

Did you watch the Hatton v. Castillo fight or the UFC action on SPIKE TV Saturday night?

Bill Simmons
  (3:50 PM)

I watched Hatton-Castillo, which was over at the 10-second mark when it became clear that Castillo was shot as a fighter (Manny Stewart even said so).

Bill Simmons
  (3:52 PM)

Two funny things though: First, they finally swapped Merchant for Kellerman, and you could tell Lampley was pissed about it because every joke by Max was greeted with deafening silence, it was fantastic. And second, Max sold the fight hard beforehand and kept predicting it could be an all-time classic... and then Castillo came out and he was just cooked. Poor Max hasn't looked that mortified since the first ratings period for "I Max" came out.

Matt (NY)

What everyone really wants to know is if Bill Simmons is going to be playing in the WSOP Main Event? Also, how would you feel about the Celts getting Noah at 5?

Bill Simmons
  (3:54 PM)

Pretty sure I'm playing - I want to see if I can break my personal record of getting bounced in 2 hours. Also, I'd be fine with Noah at No. 5, he does all the little things - hustle, rebounding, shotblocking, energy - and we don't have anyone like that. Sorry, I keep using "we."

Rob (Dallas)

Did you send Nick Bakay his check for you stealing his bit for your last Mag column?

Bill Simmons
  (3:55 PM)

I'm sorry, I didn't know Bakay invented the concept of breaking down 2 players by categories. What a brilliant idea, he hasn't gotten enough credit.


You keep saying that you wouldn't do the #5 and Al Jeff for KG because of the long term ramifications it has for your beloved C's. Dont you think having a legitimate shot next season at a title is better than another how many ever years of Ainge and Rivers with their heads up their rears? I mean, no matter what happens, the Man and the coach are idiots, so do you really expect them to contend in say three years? Why not take KG and give us Green, Jefferson and the #5 and possibly some cap relief. Come on, just give it up....

Bill Simmons
  (3:56 PM)

How would we have a legit shot at the title? We'd have KG, Pierce, 10 young guys and Doc Rivers as the coach. What title are we going for? The Atlantic Division title?

Jon (Hoboken, NJ)

Live Free or Die Hard... Prediction?

Bill Simmons
  (3:58 PM)

I have high hopes. I love the "Die Hard" franchise, 2 and 3 were better than people realized. I can't believe they waited this long... it's not like Bruce Willis had a lot on his plate.

ricky (beverly hills, ca)

Live Free will Suck Hard

James (Pedof- isle)

Who is the most coveted guest for the BS Report?

Bill Simmons
  (3:59 PM)


Bill Simmons
  (4:02 PM)

After what happened this week, I'd have to say Vince McMahon. he rarely does interviews, he's in the news and he'd be a tough get.

Bill Simmons
  (4:02 PM)

Sorry for the delay, got knocked off line

Steve (Waterbury, CT)

What are your thoughts on Kobayashi bowing out due to a jaw?

Bill Simmons
  (4:03 PM)

I was crushed! We had the American ready to beat him this year! This reminds me of the time the '86 Celtics were going to completely decimate the Lakers in the Finals, so LA took the easy way out by tanking the Houston series. Wusses.

Reggie (Cleveland)

Of the projected lottery picks, who has the biggest bust potential?

Bill Simmons
  (4:04 PM)

Good question.

Bill Simmons
  (4:04 PM)

1. Yi

Bill Simmons
  (4:04 PM)

1. Yi. 2. Yi. 3. Yi. 4. Brandan Wright 5. Yi.

PaulieP (Scottsdale)

Thoughts on players not wanting to come to Boston? (KG and Marion) Do you feel offended as a fan?

Bill Simmons
  (4:06 PM)

Not at all. Every NBA player wants to play in a big city (New York or LA), Phoenix (the weather) or Miami and Orlando (no state taxes). That's just the way the league is. It's amazing that San Diego doesn't have a team yet for this reason alone.

Tim (Atlanta)

So your telling me the hawks are drafting Yi with the 3rd pick and Brandon Wright with the 11th?

Bill Simmons
  (4:08 PM)

Come on, you're asking me to predict the Hawks?

Bill Simmons
  (4:09 PM)

Someone on my Celts message board posted this (I'm paraphrasing): The only thing to feel good about if you're a Celtics fan is that Billy Knight and Chris Wallace are picking right in front of us.

Luke (Ithaca, NY)

No, they're going to draft Yi with the 3rd pick and try to take him again with the 11th, just to make sure they got him the first time.

Chris (Yardville, NJ)

Make this Benoit thing make sense to me. I've been a huge wrestling fan for the past 17 years of my life, and for the past 12 or so, a good percentage of the highlights have involved Chris Benoit. I was at Madison Square Garden when Benoit and Eddie Guerrero stood in the ring together as World champions, along with Benoit's wife and child. Now they're all dead. I loved watching Benoit wrestle, he was one of the best in the every great match he's had is irreversably tainted. I just can't make sense of this.

Bill Simmons
  (4:11 PM)

Can't do it, Is there a website that lists all the wrestlers who've died over the past 10 years? That would be interesting.

Rich (Parsippany, NJ)

I remember the 86 Celtics, best team I ever saw play and you're right, the Lakers completely mailed it in against the Rockets... I remember wondering why were the Lakers palying so badly, but I was only ten and naive and didn't realize pros mailed in games, but at least I have Lebron to show my kids that it can happen over the next 15 years.

David Stern (NY)

William, you already had your favorite guest on the BS report. Now why don't you take some time off while we work on your gambling issues...and start dressing like a professional.

Austin (Louisville, KY)

Starting at center for the NBDL All-Stars.... YI!!

Mike (SF)

What's the best case scenario for the Celts draft?

Bill Simmons
  (4:13 PM)

Celts take Brewer, then package Wally, Gerald Green and next year's No. 1 to Utah for Kirilenko.

Bill Simmons
  (4:14 PM)

Imagine a team with Rondo, Kirilenko and Brewer defensively (three A-plus defenders), plus Pierce (a really good team defender) and Jefferson (the weak link, but at least he's athletic)? Now that's a team that makes sense to me.

Robert (Nashville, TN)

Are you still thinking of moving out of LA? Still think ATL should be your location: maximum housing value cashing out of LA; free preschool through the GA lottery (for your daughter, not you); and, the chance to write about the NBA, MLB, NFL, and the most apathetic fan base in America. What's not to like?

Bill Simmons
  (4:15 PM)

We're not leaving any time soon - I think it's been 80 degrees every day for 5 straight months. For my next move, I'm thinking Pacific Northwest. I need to be closer to Durant. I'm also going to try to legally adopt him this summer.

Vinnie (Cleveland, OH)

Bill, there is a Web site that lists all the wrestlers who have died over the years. It actually lists all of them who have died since 1985 who were less than 65 years old. Benoit is the 38th one since '85 who has died at the age of 40 or less. od/whatsrealwhatsfake/a/wrestlersdeaths.htm It's frightening the names I recognize on that list.

Andrew (Yardley, PA)

Why no summer movie review this year? Are you scared of how bad Live Free or Die Hard could actually be?

Bill Simmons
  (4:18 PM)

Saw Knocked Up last week - started out strong, faded down the stretch, about 15 minutes too long. Liked it though. Although I'm not sure how I feel about this new era of chick flicks that secretly disguise themselves as guy flicks for about 35 minutes, then the main character gets whipped and loses the will to live, but things work out in the end and we're supposed to be happy for him because he doesn't hang out with his friends anymore and his life is over.

kevin - denver, co

Would the Colorado Rockies win the AL East?

Bill Simmons
  (4:18 PM)


Spencer , Raleigh

San Diego had the Clippers. It's too laid back for an indoor winter team. Also, The CAROLINA HURRICANES drafted #11 (not the Whalers). We own a Stanley Cup and everything here. Bitter Boston Bruin Bill.

Bill Simmons
  (4:20 PM)

That was 25 years ago and they had a terrible owner. SD should have a team - they have a ton of money there (to buy all the boxes and courtside seats), and every NBA guy would want to play there. Seriously, what city makes more sense - San Diego... or Memphis? San Diego... or East Rutherford, NJ?

Matt (New York, NY)

If you were at a gentleman's club and PacMan Jones and his crew walked in, what would you do? Round up your buddies and head out the door as soon as possible? If you were getting a dance at the time, would you even wait for the end of the song?

Bill Simmons
  (4:21 PM)

I read an article about this - you're supposed to climb underneath the table, cross your legs, put your hands behind your head and lie facing the ground.

Todd, Traverse City, MI

What the duece!? Are you saying that Larry Merchant is better at ringside than Kellerman? Have you seen, or stayed awake, through Merchant's end of the fight "thoughts?" Even the fighters seem bored...

Bill Simmons
  (4:22 PM)

No way, I'm a huge Kellerman fan for boxing, he's the best guy out there. Just pointing out that he had an off-night and Lampley refused to sell his jokes. It was like listening to Dennis Miller crack jokes during the last MNF season when Michaels was refusing to laugh and Fouts's brain had turned to tapioca.

Nathan, Portland, ME

Did I miss when you added Pacman to the Tyson Zone?

Bill Simmons
  (4:23 PM)

We didn't even need to make an official announcement. Same for Michael Vick.

Mike (Dayton)

I was slamming beers in Pittsburgh this weekend to make the girls hotter. Did I make the right decision?

Bill Simmons
  (4:24 PM)

Come on, you can't diss the 'Burgh like that! Pittsburgh girls are underrated.

Christopher, Staten Island

Bill, you ever been to any big time boxing fights? If so, what was the best? I know some of them can be amazing experiences.

Bill Simmons
  (4:26 PM)

Never had good seats for a boxing match. My greatest boxing experience was dragging my Dad to Hearns-Leonard when they showed it closed-circuit at the Boston Garden in 1981 - packed house, one of the greatest fights ever, it was unbelievable. That's one of the top-10 sporting events I ever attended and it wasn't even technically live. Also, the crowd was, um, interesting to say the least.

Brian, St. Paul

I'm a T-Wolves fan, but losing hope fast...if a deal for KG falls through, will there be anything worth cheering for during the next 4 seasons (besides watching a future hall-of-famer waste the tail-end of his career)?

Bill Simmons
  (4:27 PM)

Wait, you had hope in the first place? You have McHale and Taylor running your team!

Evan (Sac)

Isn't it obvious that Mayweather needs to fight Hatton in a black vs white showdown, i would love to see that. Especially since their styles are so different. I can't see Mayweather dancing around and acting like a little girl against him.

Bill Simmons
  (4:28 PM)

mayweather wants no part of Hatton - he's made more than enough money and doesn't want to get hit anymore.

Joe (Boston)

Bill sorry to jump the gun here, but could you please give me your thoughts on who I should keep in my football keeper league? I can keep two of: Frank Gore, Maurice Jones-Drew, Steve Smith, Chad Johnson, Antonio Gates. Which two? I had to ask now, because our keeper submission deadline is in two weeks.

Bill Simmons
  (4:30 PM)

Wow, a fantasy FB question! I was just at the newsstand last weekend looking for mags, we're still about a week away. I like Gore and Jones-Drew the most on that list. I can't wait to take Wes Welker 5 rounds too early in both of my drafts, mark it down right now.

Jason (Staten Island, NY)

Are you off the Alton Williams bandwagon? The guy has been a shade of his old self during "Inferno III" and he's sucking wind in the Vegas reunion show. Now...what about Derrick Kosinski? He's constantly outclassed in height and weight, but he may as well be among the top competitors in recent Challenge history. The only reason why he hasn't won a Challenge has been rotten luck. When would you be interviewing him?

Bill Simmons
  (4:32 PM)

I think Alton needs to cut back on those Newports - the basketball game at the Palms was humiliating, although njot as humiliating as the fact that they spent the night in the Hardwood Suite throwing ice at each other. The real question: Has there been an MTV show with more product placement? it's like a 30-minute informercial for the Palms and Trishelle's new movie. I hated the Vegas Reunion show - it's off my Season Pass. And Entourage, you're on deck.

Matt D: San Diego

BS, have you watched "On the Lot?" Carrie Fisher has had so much work done, she looks like she is wearing the "Michael Myers" mask from Halloween...

Aqib (Cleveland, Ohio)

So when does Danny Ainge get inducted into the pantheon of atrocious GMs. The guy caused me to abandon the Celtics and become a Cavs fan, why hasn't he gotten enough hate?

Bill Simmons
  (4:34 PM)

Probably on Thursday.

Ryan (Miami, FL)

Can we make it official that repeated failure to squeeze into a paralell parking spot is now called "pulling a Meadow". Alternatively, you can remark to your buddy: "Nice work Meadow, maybe the third time is the charm", or some variation on this.

Bill Simmons
  (4:36 PM)

I like it. By the way, I have watched that episode about 47 times and still can't decide if Tony died or not. Check out the "Last Supper" theory by Bob Harris if you haven't seen it, really interesting.

Lopez (Chicago)

Man, I've already bought 4 Fantasy Football mags from the newsstands out here, including the ESPN one. You're falling behind Simmons.

Bill Simmons
  (4:38 PM)

I was at a Borders 6 days ago and they didn't have anything... all right, I'm hitting a newsstand today. You know what's going to be off the charts on the comedy scale? When Vick gets taken. I can't wait for that.

Adam: (New York, NY)

You are exactly the guy to settle this: For the first time in my life this past weekend I was fortunate enough have "Mr. Roboto" as the background song for a lap dance. Needless to say, it was a wastershed comedic moment in my life. Watching a stripper try to put together a dance that was both alluring and contextually appropriate given the song was more entertaining than watching Eric Dickerson try to ad-lib an analysis of Lyndon Johnson's "Great Society." Anyway, the question: Is "Mr. Roboto" the funniest possible strip-club song to provoke this absolutely riveting experience?

Bill Simmons
  (4:41 PM)

It scares me that I'm exactly the guy to settle this. I still think "We Built This City" would be funnier - that's my answer to any "funniest song in a situation" question. But I think it would be funny to see someone strip to "We didn't start the fire" by Billy Joel - that song's so fast, I don't know what could happen there. Any suggestions are welcome.

Jon (San Diego, CA)

Bill, San Diego doesn't have the passion amongst the locals to support a basketball team unless they're in first place. Trust me, I'm a Jersey native, I can smell the sports apathy out here. People forget that only 2-3 years ago, Chargers games were blacked out because they couldn't sell out home games with a subpar record.


You should find some solice that this is the draft that you recieved a #1 pick form the Cavs for Jiri Welsch. Even though I dont think the Celts have that pick anymore you can feel good that no move they make will be as bad as that one.

Priyank, PA

How much longer for the chat? Need to know how long I have to hold it before my bladder bursts

Bill Simmons
  (4:43 PM)

Not sure... it took me 45 minutes to snap out of serious mode after Benoit/Celtics talk. Sorry I'm not more gregarious. Finally loosening up.

Morgan (Dallas)

Have you seen the Garnett to Dallas rumors? Do you think the Mavs would be better if they had to move Howard, Terry and Harris?

Bill Simmons
  (4:43 PM)

That won the award for "dumbest rumor" - they can't get KG unless they deal Dirk.

Aaron (Cville)

Did you see that the Chinese government wants Yi Jianlan to go to the Celts? If Ainge picks him, at least you can blame it on a conspiracy and not incompetence.

Bill Simmons
  (4:44 PM)

The Chinese already ruined the sixth season of "24" - now they're gonna ruin the Celtics?

Mike (NYC)

I think "TNT" by AC/DC would be in the top 5, that is about the most awkward song I've seen someone strip/dance to.

Ron (Phoenix)

Why is it that you always diss McHale (deservedly so) for his GM skills but I never hear you say a word about the incredibly mediocre job the "Basketball Jesus" has done with the Pacers?

Bill Simmons
  (4:45 PM)

How dare you.

Brian (Atlanta, GA)

You overwhelmed Bob Harris' site. Congratulations.

Bill Simmons
  (4:46 PM)

I feel terrible. I wonder if Bob was listening to "Don't Stop Believin'" when it happened.

Jimmy M (Holliston, MA)

Chad Ford's new Mock Draft has Jared Dudley going at #28 for the Spurs. Is there a more perfect selection for the back-end of this year's draft? He was born to be a Spur. I've been spent the last few weeks rooting for the Celts to take Dudley with their second round pick, but now I feel it wouldn't be fair for his career to be destroyed by Boston, he should just get to go win the next 3 or 4 titles in San Antonio.

Bill Simmons
  (4:47 PM)

I agree. Dudley is one of THE sleepers this year. He's going to go about 10-15 picks later than he should, he'll help a goods team, and everyone will feel dumb for passing on him for guys like Fazekas and McRoberts. This makes me mad.

Kevin O'Conner (Salt Lake City)

Wally, Theo, and #5 for Kirilenko?

Bill Simmons
  (4:48 PM)

Can't do it. AK47 has $63 million due over the next 4 years.

Eric D

How do you feel about Sean Williams being projected to go in the first round? He had his problems (being kicked off the team for drug use) at BC, but this guy is an absolute beast defensively.

Bill Simmons
  (4:51 PM)

He's the big sleeper of the first round... I think he'll go 14 to 17, and there's 100% chance he'll own a Whizzanator at some point in his career.

Blake (Denver)

What was more improbable about Knocked Up? That Seth Rogan would get the girl or that him and his slacker-friends would even be at that bar in the first place?

Bill Simmons
  (4:52 PM)

Seth Rogen getting Katherine Heigl... that was right up there with the Drago-Balboa fight taking place in Christmas Eve in Russia and Rocky waiving his paycheck.

Luke (Ithaca, NY)

What will it take for you talk about the Sox? We're in the middle of one of the most amazing seasons for such Sox talk - Lester returning from cancer, Pedroia (a guy you knocked repeatedly) being better than Lugo, Crisp and Drew combined, amazing Asian imports in Okajima and Dice-K, Beckett being outstanding, Tavarez providing endless comedy on the pitcher's mound, Youk's beard-like-thing and Boggs-like-hitting, and, oh yeah, a freaking outstanding lead in the East. You're just not giving this enough airtime in any means. Is it the goddamn Pink Hat Nation bringing you down? Let the NBA and the Celtics go for a second and talk some baseball!

Bill Simmons
  (4:55 PM)

I don't want to jinx anything. We have a 10-game lead. I opened my mouth once on the first "Johnny Are you Worried Yet?" segment and the yankees immediately ripped off eight straight,

John Simmons, Richlands VA

Why do the Rockets get off the hook for drafting Olajuwon instead of Jordan when they already had Sampson?

Bill Simmons
  (4:56 PM)

Not quite sure. The move they made (And Filip Bondy wrote about it in his new book about the '84 Draft) was Sampson for the No. 2 pick, which was actually on the table and Houston didn't want to do it. They could have had Hakeem AND Jordan. Yikes.

Bill Simmons
  (4:57 PM)

That's one of the all-time NBA "What ifs" along with "What would have happened if Bias didn't die?" and "What would have happened had Portland held onto Moses before the '76-77 season?"

web (Lexington, KY)

Bill, we going to see you on friday at apple buying an iphone? and any thoughts on Barcelona becoming the best professional team in any sport with the addition of Thierry Henry?

Bill Simmons
  (4:58 PM)

No I-Phone for me... I'm excited for the 47 near-riots though.

Matt (Las Vegas)

What are the chances Portland takes Durant over Oden? I live in Vegas and plan on betting on this (since gambling IS legal... here). Can we consult Janet Gretzky?

Bill Simmons
  (4:59 PM)

I'd put the odds like this: Oden (-150) Durant

Bill Simmons
  (4:59 PM)

Last week before their workouts, it was Oden (-350) Durant.

Jeff, Manhattan

So i guess you endorse the new Filip Biondi book?

Bill Simmons
  (5:00 PM)

Not necessarily, I knew most of the stuff. If you want to read a great basketball book, finally has "Loose Balls" by Terry Pluto in stock, that's a classic.

Ryan Dwars (Cedar Rapids, IA)

What are your thoughts on the FX show, Rescue Me with Denis Leary? I like the show because its different than anything else on TV.

Bill Simmons
  (5:01 PM)

Funny you should ask. When I mentioned in the last chat that I needed a summer show, the majority of readers recommended Rescue Me and The Shield as the two I'm missing out on...

Bill Simmons
  (5:02 PM)

So I bought Season One of Rescue Me and watched the pilot two nights ago - I have to admit, it was really, really good. Almost made me forgive Denis Leary for ripping off Bill Hicks. We'll see if the rest of the season holds up, but the pilot was great.

Brendon: (NJ)

NBA TV should do a rebroadcast of every past NBA Draft, with the only change being a re-write of the strengths and weaknesses. Think of the potential here: Shawn Bradley Strengths: Strong Poster Creating Ability Vin Baker Weaknesses: Jack Daniels

Bill Simmons
  (5:04 PM)

I was watching a little yesterday morning... they had the 1988 Draft on and the two analysts were arguing about whether GSW made a mistake picking Mitch Richmond 5th. One guy was adamant that they screwed up. it was hysterical. What a crapshoot the draft is.

Richard (Naperville, IL)

Bill, I know you hate on the Bulls, but who should we get?

Bill Simmons
  (5:04 PM)

Noah. He's perfect for them.

Steven (Lubbock, TX)

Whats your deal with wanting to trade for AK-47? He kind of looks like misplaced eastern europeon male model to me and didnt help the Jazz much at all in the playoffs

Bill Simmons
  (5:06 PM)

All right, here's my counter: Did you see the Mavs-Warriors series, which was the only time Utah let loose and abandoned their deliberate style? AK47 was amazing in that series - averaged something like a 16-9 with 4 blocks a game. He's playing out of position on a team that slows everything down and plays deliberately... OF COURSE HE'S GOING TO SUCK! He's the best guy out there for the price.

Khalid (Boston)

Are you setting yourself up for sheer disappointment on Thursday?

Bill Simmons
  (5:07 PM)

I'm already there. I'm actyually really worried about how this will affect the annual Draft Diary. Since '97, we've never had the subplot of the Celtics screwing up the next 6 years of the franchise.

Doug (Brookfield, IL)

Joakim Noah?!! Just what we need in Chicago. Another hustle guy who can't get his own shot and stalls our offense.

Bill Simmons
  (5:09 PM)

You don't need another scorer - you're loaded at the 1-2-3 spots - and you're not getting a good low-post player at No. 9. Noah makes the most sense because, eventually, you can trade Wallace as part of a package for a big-money low-post guy (or even do it this season).

Mike (Sparta, NJ)

I was listening to Mike and Mike the other day, and the discussion was top 10 PG's of all time. They had Nash in, but not Gary Payton. Now, am I crazy, or would Payton in his prime absolutely destroyed Nash on both ends of the floor?

Bill Simmons
  (5:10 PM)

GP would have KILLED Steve Nash. Nobody remembers this, but he decimated John Stockton in the '96 Playoffs. Killed him. Crushed him. GP was one of the best PG's ever by any calculation.

Marko (Bay Area)

If I'm in need of inside help and have a pick after about 20, I roll the dice on Glen this crazy??

Bill Simmons
  (5:12 PM)

I don't think it's crazy at all - three years at LSU, three double-double seasons in the 17-10 range. Not sure why he slipped... he was on an awful team last year.

Dan NY

Im a Knick fan, do I really have to listen to you whine about the Celtics' problems? FWTF!!

Bill Simmons
  (5:12 PM)

Terrific point.

Joe, VA

For the strip club song... 500 miles by the Proclaimers.

mj (Lexington, Ky)

Give us your first three thoughts on KG playing alongside Kobe.

Bill Simmons
  (5:13 PM)

1. We'd have all our answers to every question about both of them.

Bill Simmons
  (5:14 PM)

2. I'd enjoy their fake friendship where they pretended to be buddy buddy and Kobe over-laughed at his jokes.

Bill Simmons
  (5:15 PM)

3. They could compete for the title every year for the next five with Kobe, KG, Phil and 10 mediocre guys.

paul shirley(kansas)

bill, have you forgotten that we are the only two people who write for that know that music has been released since "Whip it"? help these guys out, I haven't had a chat in a while.

Bill Simmons
  (5:17 PM)

havent had any music questions... not sure why. all NBA and wrestling.

Peter (Tarzana, CA)

Oden (-150) as the #1 pick, huh? Can I parlay that with Atlanta not taking a PG at #3 or #11 (-200)?


How about "Everybody Hurts" by REM for a lap dance?

Mike, Oswego, NY

Im sure you saw Hollinger rated Brewer at about the 30th best prospect in this years draft, Im guessing you don't put any weight into his system?

Bill Simmons
  (5:18 PM)

haven't seen that column yet but I'm going to skip it now...

Bill Simmons
  (5:19 PM)

Have a couple links to pass along...

Bill Simmons
  (5:19 PM)

jeff B. from Ann Arbor: City: "This link takes you to old NBA draft transactions. Talk about crafting the draft-look at what the Lakers *got* in the Goddrich deal that landed them Magic. Also interesting that, in '76, the Warriors actually used the Lakers pick to take Robert Parish.

Bill Simmons
  (5:19 PM)

Aaron in Philly: "With all your Janet Gretzky jokes in your NHL Draft running diary, I thought you might appreciate this Gotta love Youtube, and Ulf Samuelsson."

Bill Simmons
  (5:20 PM)

Rob in Toronto: This is probably the best fight video / song compilation i've ever seen. Especially for a toronto fan.

Bill Simmons
  (5:20 PM)

* Mike B. in Massapequa, NY takes it to another level by suggesting a funny clip, only it's a clip he created himself: "I'm a big Mike and the Mad Dog fan and thought you might appreciate this clip of me doing an impersonation of the Mad Dog's rant about Pacman Jones after the NBA All-Star Game in Las Vegas."

Bill Simmons
  (5:21 PM)

* Ted M. in Baltimore: "Howard Cosell calling the 1980 Battle of the Network Stars This breaks the unintential comedy scale. I had to stop watching after he said 'Cathy Lee Crosby has a groin pull.'"

Bill Simmons
  (5:21 PM)

Jon B. from Vernon Hills: "Pure comic gold here, in the form of Philip Michael Thomas having an angel dust induced meltdown in the grocery store."

Bill Simmons
  (5:22 PM)

Also, it's been circulating the 'net for a week, but if you haven't listened to Elijah Dukes's radio interview yet, make sure you carve out 20 minutes to do so. I am pushing hard behind the scenes for a new ESPN show called "Quite Frankly with Elijah Dukes."

Brent (Portland, OR)

Bill - why isn't there real-time wagering on sporting events available on cross-country commercial flights? The on-line access is available, the TV feed is available, the cocktails are already there and you tell me what better defines a "captive" audience. This should be a credit card swipe away on every major airline. How do we make this happen?

Bill Simmons
  (5:23 PM)

Now that's the idea of the day!

Mike (Chicago)

I would like a lap dance to Rick Astley's "Never gonna give you up".

Bill Simmons
  (5:25 PM)

I'm glad you brought this up. When I was in college, we used to go to Papa Gino's for All You Can Eat Pasta night, which was fantastic. Anyway, right when we got there one night, I put $5 into the jukebox and just selected that same Rick Astley song over and over again so that it would play for the entire time we were there. The reactions from the diners were priceless. Every time the song ended, you could see people praying that it wouldn't start again, and then it would. I miss college.

Nathan (Phoenix)

Good call on one sleeper, Jared Dudley's number 10 on Hollinger's article.

Bill Simmons
  (5:26 PM)

OK, now I want to read it.


Where's my mojo? It seems like I couldn't hit a whiffle ball right now...

Bill Simmons
  (5:27 PM)

Please, start grabbing your crotch more often. Ever since they had that talk with you, you've been a mess. grab the crotch, Julio. Grab it. Don't worry about what people will think.

Jake (Boston)

John Hollinger has given me even more reason to have nightmares the next two nights. Read the article- it will terrify you.

Bill Simmons
  (5:28 PM)

now i'm afraid again

Chris G, Tallahassee

5:30 Quittin time! thanks for helping me get through the last 2 hours of my day. My production is at an all time low

Bill Simmons
  (5:29 PM)

Yeah, you're probably right. Let's start wrapping this up shortly. Please don't send me angry e-mails when this chat abruptly goes right to Insider, that's just trhe way the system works, we'll have a transcript for you at some point soon.

Rene (Toronto, ON)

During the day, they replayed the 1993 NBA Draft, and they listed Robert Horry's weakness as "Intensity" ... let's ask Steve Nash if Horry still has that problem!

Bill Simmons
  (5:30 PM)

In the '88 or '89 Draft yesterday, Eric Leckner's weaknesses were "rebounding and intensity." That killed me. No mention of his lack of athleticism.

Benny, Hong Kong

Bill, predict the rookie season stats for Oden and Durant right now.

Bill Simmons
  (5:30 PM)

Oden: 14 PPG, 11.3 RPG, 2.6 BPG, 65 games.

Bill Simmons
  (5:31 PM)

Durant: 17.9 PPG, 8.1 RPG, 1.7 BPG, 42% from three.

Mike (Saskatoon, SK)

So, you're not going to admit that liking the Bravery was a Kevin McHale-type selection?

Bill Simmons
  (5:32 PM)

"Time Won't Let Me Go" - good new tune. There are worse bands than the Bravery.

Danny Ainge (Boston)

Bill, didn't you hear that Pierce just demanded a trade unless I bring in a big vet, a la O'Neal, KB, or KG??? I should trade him and then take Brewer, right? Your thoughts?

Bill Simmons
  (5:33 PM)

I want to live in a world where NBA "franchise players" don't agree to $20 million per year extensions, then demand trades 12 months later.

Ryan (SLC)

Just thought I'd confirm your thought that the Kirilenko trade makes sense. As a die-hard Jazz fan, I actually think it makes sense on both sides. I'd rather have two guys who can shoot (Wally, Green) than a guy who is going to have a nervous break down next year if he doesn't get away from Coach Sloan.

Bill Simmons
  (5:33 PM)

Good, then it's settled. let's call it in to Commissioner Stern.

luke, Tucson, AZ

Players rated above Brewer in Hollinger's system include: Fazekas, McRoberts, Dudley, Kyle Visser, Sean Williams, Herbert Hill, etc... I don't agree with any of this, but is it possible for Brewer to fall way short of expectations? I wouldn't think so, especially since his defense is his strength. Any thoughts?

Bill Simmons
  (5:34 PM)

Hold on, I'm pulling my tongue out of the back of my throat.

Doug (Dallas, TX)

Did you see Hollinger's draft rankings? Kevin Durant scored off the charts. He is over 200 points above Greg Oden. Plus Hollinger can't factor in the "chip on the shoulder" that Durant will have after he gets picked second. Get excited.

Bill Simmons
  (5:35 PM)

I like that John Hollinger!

Logan (Bellevue, WA)

Am I alone in thinking that "Donna Martin Graduate!" is a great rallying cry, regardless of what's going on? I'd like to see more "Donna Martin Graduate!" chants at sporting events.

Bill Simmons
  (5:36 PM)

Forgot to mention: I made a joke about the Canadian exchange rate in Monday's NHL column... apparently, it's 93 cents on the US dollar right now. Good God! That's Canada's music!

pete, vancouver BC

That creepy Joan Osborne song about God is my nominee for worst strip club song.

nick eht, nj

Mike and the Mechanics "The Living Years" would also be an awful strip club song.........

Justin (Nowhere, TN)

Come on, can you really blame Paul Pierce for wanting out? He signed that extension expecting that the team would do SOMETHING toward pushing for a title. Now he's coached by a guy who would be overwhelmed at the middle-school girls' level, the team's about to bank its franchise on the Chinese Brad Lohaus, there's no rhyme or reason to anything the front office does... wouldn't you want out of that, too? Hasn't the franchise betrayed him with its incompetence?

Bill Simmons
  (5:39 PM)

No, he signed it HOPING they'd do something. Big difference. I'm just tired of guys like Gasol, O'Neal and Pierce bitching about their teams when part of the team's problem is that they're spending 1/3rd of their cap on guys who aren't franchise players (or in Gasol's case, 1/5th). The whole "get me some help" routine should only work if you're in the class of KG or Kobe and you're a legitimate franchise guy who got screwed over by a GM.

Adam (East Lansing)

Kevin Durant is a remarkable player, but this is a perfect example of why you will never be a GM Sports guy. Admittedly you could do it better than about a third of the guys working right now, but there is no way you pass a franchise center up for someone who has the potential to be abigger bust than Sam Bowie.

Bill Simmons
  (5:41 PM)

I'll never be a GM because it would be ridiculous if anyone ever hired me as a GM. But I'm right about Durant. None of this will come back to haunt me, barring injury. I am right about this. He's going to be an all-timer.

Tracy McGrady (Houston, TX)

Bill Simmons: (5:39 PM ET ) No, he signed it HOPING they'd do something. Big difference. I'm just tired of guys like Gasol, O'Neal and Pierce bitching about their teams when part of the team's problem is that they're spending 1/3rd of their cap on guys who aren't franchise players (or in Gasol's case, 1/5th). The whole "get me some help" routine should only work if you're in the class of KG or Kobe and you're a legitimate franchise guy who got screwed over by a GM. Do I count here? John Weisbrod & The Orlando Sentinel tag teamed me out of Orlando, where I'm from.

Bill Simmons
  (5:42 PM)

Yeah, you count T-Mac.

Ryan (Dallas, TX)

New rule. You can't be a franchise player if you can't take your team out of the first round or even to the playoffs.

Bill Simmons
  (5:42 PM)


Robert, Dallas

As the father of a baby girl I would assume your friends who only have boys taunt and joke about their kids dating your daughter. What do you do? Not sure if I should ignore them, acknowledge the better jokes or kill them.

Bill Simmons
  (5:43 PM)

My friend Sully does this to me constantly. I'm going to have my revenge 13 years from now when I pay off his kid's English teacher to embroil them in one of those Pam Smart sex scandals.

Jason (Seattle)

Man, you just totally jinxed Durant with that proclamation. If he breaks his leg slipping in a rain puddle, I'm gunning for you.

Bill Simmons
  (5:44 PM)

I didn't jinx anything, He can't miss. MJ couldn't miss, LBron couldn't miss and this kid can't miss. Sometimes you just know with these things.

Lincoln (Seattle)

KJR sports radio in Seattle is reporting the Hawks are enamored with Ridnour and are offering # 11 for him. If this is for real, the Atlanta Hawks are my all-time favorite franchise!

Nick (Boston)

Did the producers of Entourage take Horatio Sanz's depiction of Gene Shalit, combine it with a bad Antonio Banderas impression, and spice it up with a pinch of the '2Pac walking out of court' strut to recreate Pablo Escobar? It's pretty embarrassing.

Bill Simmons
  (5:46 PM)

You raise a good point - were those scenes supposed to be tongue in cheek (because it was a discreet way of telling is the movie is going to bomb), Or was Adrian Grenier just that bad? It had to be one or the other, right?

josh ut

Just one more thought on the Benoit situation for the non-wrestling fans. This was the equivalent of a Derek Fisher or Donovan Mcnabb or Derek Jeter committing the act, one of the most recognizable class acts of a sport. The man was known as classy individual and had the respect of everyone he worked with. If your kid was going to be a wrestler, you would have wanted him to be Chris Benoit. This is why it is so hard for the wrestling community to come to grip with this tragedy.

Jonathan (Boston)

Disco Duck by Rick Dees. We have a winner!

Bill Simmons
  (5:49 PM)

All right, looks like we're done. Tomorrow, Chad Ford and I are going head to head in an interactive mock draft on Not sure of the time or the format, but at the very least, it should be interesting. After that, I'm going to church for the first time in 4 years to pray that the Celtics don't do anything dumb. See you tomorrow, thanks for all the questions on short notice!