Hello, SportsNation. It's only been a few weeks since my last chat here, yet you've aged terribly.
Potential topics for today: bowl season, the end of the NFL regular season, the NFL playoffs AND THE PGA SEASON STARTING IN 3 DAYS!!!!!
But we need to keep it moving because I have an interview at PITT for head football coach at 4:00 p.m.
What's wrong with the golf season starting?
Nothing. It's just that it never ended. It might help if anyone missed it. If MLB was like the PGA, pitcher and catchers would report on November 3rd.
how did you get started
Short version: my parents had a bottle of wine one night, I watched the Pirates lose 3 consecutive NLCS's as a kid, perhaps decided I could cope with the pain by making light of sports, started sportspickle after college, got a bunch of media coverage, started writing for ESPN. Next? President of the World, of course.
During the Winter Classic in Pittsburgh, Jerome Bettis and Franco Harris engaged in a hilarious/depressing "shootout". Other than Jeff Reed coming back and playing goalie while drunk, I don't think anything could have made this better. Your thoughts?
I have to say I was impressed with Bettis' hockey skills. Does anyone know where he grew up? Perhaps it was a cold weather city. Who knows. It's a mystery.
That said, it obviously could have been improved. And the best way to do that would have been to give a nod to Pittsburgh's rich hockey heritage. And, by that I mean, of course, having Bettis and Franco shoot at a goal manned by Jean Claude Van Damme.
True or False: A team of hobos that has practiced together for less than two weeks would be able to roll a top tier Big 10 team by at least three touchdowns in a New Years Day bowl game?
35 bowl games is way way way way too many. But I would watch the Hobo Bowl brought to you by Tin Cans. And so would America.
Are you friends with Gary Neal?
No, don't know him. But we did go to the same college. And, let me tell you, I could get dunked on by J.R. Smith WAY better than he can.
What is the best and the worst college football game that you have seen this season?
Auburn's ... I mean, Cam Newton's (sorry) comeback against Alabama was pretty impressive. As for worst? I'm sure almost no one else saw this, but the first half of PITT-South Florida was some of the worst football I've ever seen. It was sort of like a prequel of last night's Seahawks-Rams game. "NFC West: The College Years."
How about having Jean Vandeveld take a golf swing slap shot at a goal manned by Jean Claude Van Damme?
Also incredibly entertaining television.
Does the TCU-Wisconsin outcome do anything to get us closer to a tournament?
Not at all. The Big Ten has been doing everything it can to keep the BCS as is to stay relevant. They're only going to try harder now that they got crushed. Again.
You're welcome for Steve Pederson.
I think PITT should hire Bill Callahan. He had to learn a lot at Nebraska, right? Right? He'd definitely be better than Mike Haywood, I think we can give him that.
Talk about me!!! Talk about me!!! Talk about me!!! Talk about me!!! Talk about me!!! Talk about me!!! Talk about me!!!
Why did you just run off the field yesterday without talking to the media? That's not like you at all. I'm getting suspicious. You're planning something, aren't you? The press conference to end all press conferences. You're going nuclear.
I know its crazy that we (Seattle) made it to the playoffs..wouldnt you love to see us somehow make it to the superbowl????
This chat is fantastic. Did it start? Do you think Tim Tebow gets confused when he sees Charlie Whitehurst?
Definitely. Heck, I'd bet Jesus would even get briefly confused seeing Charlie Whitehurst. "Wait, how can I be over there and here? Ohhhhhhh, right. Ultimate power."
Lakers fan here..for the 1st time in a few years im worried about r team. What is your honest opinion on the 2010-2011 Lakers team?
They are the October-November 2010 Heat. Everyone will enjoy laughing at their troubles now, and then we'll all shut up in the playoffs and pretend we knew all along that they were really good.
I guess a lot of people (in hockey terms) watched the Winter Outside Game, but it seemed pretty terrible for the players as well as for those in attendance. So I guess my question is... I just think hockey is dumb.
If HGH makes your head and hands big, does it work down there as well?
Because this is a family-friendly chat, I'm going to assume that by "down there" you mean "feet." And since you therefore mean feet, I'm going to assume that "Nick (CA)" is an alias for "Rex (NY)". Hi, Rex! My first star fan. Neat!
Not that I don't value all of you, the unwashed non-stars. It would just really help MY career if one of you would become famous. If you could get on that in the New Year, I'd really appreciate it. Thanks!
I like applesauce!
I like turtles.
People will come Ray, People will most definitely come.
Why does it keep raining in LA?
Sorry, Logan. I only do weather on the 8s.
If Sisters of the Poor University were to play OSU in the Sugar Bowl, how big of a favorite would the Sisters be? 10 pts?
I think two touchdowns. The question is, would Ohio State players corrupt the poor sisters by convincing them to trade their nun outfits and rosaries for cash.
Speaking of fetishes, an ex of mine really loved tan white guys. Her favorite website was full of Mike Shanahan pictures.
Mike Shanahan is all about GTL: Gym, Tan, Losing.
Gallo you suck
2002...the last time the Big 10 won a National Championship in football or basketball. Why do experts consistently overrate them?
Have you spent any time around Leaders or Legends? It's hard not to be starstruck.
My Saints have a good start for the playoffs? Don't u see us making another run this year?
I'm worried they're going to be overconfident. Early reports are that they're not planning to bring their pads to Seattle and that Sean Payton is planning to start Drew Brees' adorable son at quarterback.
Can I hear a joke about Jay Cutler? Also, what are your thoughts on the Bears?
Jay Cutler walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face." Cutler says: "My face isn't long. You're thrown off by my neck." (Sorry, that's the best I could do on short notice.)
As for the Bears, I think they're almost as good as the 13-3 Dick Jauron Bears!
Can I still go to Disneyland this summer? Or is that only for the winners? I like Goofy. He's funny.
Wow, did you hear them say on Sunday night that Pete Carroll is 59 years old and the second oldest coach in the league?
Age is just a number. Live Forever.
The potential QB matchups in the Super Bowl must have the people who write/produce the annoying redemption stories licking their chops. Big Ben v Mike Vick? Tony Dungy's head might 'splode.
Except the Patriots are the heavy favorite. So let's not overlook the story of Tom Brady's brave journey back from baldness. (Thanks, hair plugs!)
Now that Randy Edsall is coaching Maryland, how long until leads them to a 28 point loss in a BCS game?
I really respect him for taking a step down. You don't see that every day. Have to respect it.
Gallo, whats your problem with Seattle? I dont know why you hate, you are the NFC West of ESPN columnists
Yes! I win! You just insulted yourself by trying to insult me. (And I don't have a problem with Seattle. Fantastic town. Terrible football team.)
Unless you meant that I'm a diamond in the rough and deserve way more respect with your NFC West line because I'm secretly awesome. In that case ... THANKS, FELLA!
Why am I hearing about Bracketology and the NFL draft on January 3rd?
The same reason you were hearing about it on December 3rd. (By the way, if anyone tells you Tennessee if getting anything better than the 2nd seed in the West bracket IT'S A LIE! LIESSSSSSSS!!!!!!)
Did uou see that old cooking broad Paula Deen toss the coin for the Rose Bowl? I'm surprised she didn't eat it thinking it was chocolate. Anyway, wouldn't it be funny if the "celebrity" tosser just winged the coin as far as they could, then defiantly walked off the field giving the crowd the finger? Well, that's what I would do.
See, another chat participant who I wish would become famous. Partly for my own gain. No, MAINLY for my own gain. But also because then you would be invited to do a coin toss and could carry out your awesome plan.
do u know anything about basketball??? we r in basketball season and you havent answered a single question? what do u honestly think of this years Spurs team?
What do you mean? I said I could get dunked on way better than Gary Neal.
Since your name--really an anagram for JAG DOLL--reveals your love for the Jag's, how did it feel to watch them roll over and play dead against the Texans?
Go Jags! Well, I don't think they were going anywhere in the playoffs even if they made it, so by losing they have a better chance of getting Tim Tebow in the draft. Ohhhhhhhh ... right. Well played, Jaguars! Well played.
yeah thats an idiotic answer btw lol can u answer the original question about the spurs??
Yes. I think the Spurs are very good this year. I just hope they don't win the title because kids my start tearing their ACLs to be like DeJuan Blair.
Since your name in really an anagram for lag lodj, how do you feel about the lodge this year?
Eh. It was okay. A bit drafty.
Your colleagues at Football Outsiders put up a stat that said that the Sanchize lead the league in dropped interceptions this year. That got me to thinking- if Brett Favre had mastered this trait, how many Super Bowls would he have gone to?
The Sanchise is just that full of poise and moxie and the the other words that TV people say about young quarterbacks who aren't that good yet. Oh! "Flacco-y" is another such term. Anyway, he's just that full of poise and moxie that he knows to put a little something on it so that defensive backs drop the ball. That, or all defensive backs have brick hands, which is the sole reason they are DBs instead of receivers.
Didn't you tear your ACL?
I did. Had surgery almost 8 weeks ago now. And I'm still not playing for the Spurs. My surgeon should prepare for a medical malpractice suit.
do you think the steelers can beat the patriots?
Wait, why aren't you on TV anymore?
Who said I'm not on TV anymore? Watch any basketball game. I'm the annoying guy behind the broadcasting crew on my cellphone asking my brohims if they can see me on TV.
Heard you twisted your ankle. How was that?
Ugh. Let's not give him any ideas. Brett Favre, player-coach, seems like the next logical step for him.
Don't know what happened there. Someone asked me if Brett Favre would be the coach of the Raiders. Moving along ...
Why are libraries legal? Don't they hurt authors?
They don't help. But no one liking to read books anymore seems to be a bigger problem.
Can you give us a sure-fire guaranteed not to miss sports prediction for 2011?
80 wins for the Pirates!!!
Whoops. Read that wrong. Didn't see the "not."
Pitt needs to continue having a mustachioed coach. I can't come up with anyone though. Any ideas?
Give me in 2 seconds your super bowl champion???
New England Pa ... ah, crap. Couldn't get it out in time. Slow typer.
is it sad when your sarcastic prediction of way to many wins for your hometown baseball team still involves them finishing below .500?
It was a real prediction! Which I'll be sure to tell you about when/if it comes true. If it doesn't though ... I WAS TOTALLY JOKING!!!
What are the odds that Jon Gruden coaches the Cleveland Browns and it gives the city of Cleveland something to be somewhat excited towards, other than LeBron bashing? Also, will the Cleveland Indians be playing in the MLB this season? I'm not sure, wondering if you knew.
I'm pretty sure Mike Holmgren won't bring in any big name coach. He wants to run things. In fact, maybe he'll name himself coach. Then it's nothing but the glory land of 8-8 and 9-7 season for the Cleveland Browns!!!
As for the Indians, I welcome all kinds of sports fans to my chats -- even obviously very casual fans -- but the Cleveland "Indians" are not a real baseball team. You're thinking of the fictional team in "Major League."
What about the guy who ran for mayor in New York and complained about the rent? Wouldn't he be an excellent coach for PITT?
The other team's POINTS ... ARE TOO DAMN HIGH!
Would you take a charge from Lebron or just run away?
Run away. RUN AWAAAAAAAYYYYYYYY!
Hey DJ. What did you think about Jason Whitlock complimenting you on twitter. Was it the greatest moment of your life? Also, my dad played football at Ball State with Whitlock, so I feel as if we have some creepy connection between us.
I did not start Twitter. It was Joss Stone.
Or Biz Stone. Whatever. One of them sings, one has weird glasses and runs a site that crashes every 20 minutes. Same difference.
Try and tackle Jerome Bettis, take a punch from Tyson or fight Bob Probert on the ice...which one of the three would you do if you had to do one???
None of them sound fun. Probert would destroy you. Bettis would hurt, unless you got him right in the stomach and then it might just feel like someone threw a bean bag chair at you. But I think I'd try to fight Tyson. I beat him plenty of times in Punch-Out, you just have to avoid that opening flurry.
Bob Probert is dead.
I don't think he meant now, Debbie Downer. If he meant now, none of them are all that intimidating. Like you said, Probert is no longer living and Bettis and Tyson would get winded just getting off the couch.
Clevland has a baseball team? "Yes, we have uniforms and everything"
"This guy's dead."
Well, my time is up, good people of SportsNation. And I have to get into the chancellor's office for my interview. Marvin Lewis is walking out now. Wait, I'm up against Marvin Lewis??? YES! I've got this job locked up.